Porn-Induced Sexual Dysfunction Is A Growing Problem

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This article is a bit dated, for more up to date info see the Porn & ED section, and begin with START HERE: Porn-Induced Sexual Dysfunction.

Also see:


Update, 7-12-14: The first peer-reviewed study to ask the question finds porn-induced ED. About 60% of compulsive porn users reported erectile dysfunction in this brain scan study - Neural Correlates of Sexual Cue Reactivity in Individuals with and without Compulsive Sexual Behaviours (2014). From the study (CSB are compulsive porn users):

CSB subjects reported that as a result of excessive use of sexually explicit materials.....experienced diminished libido or erectile function specifically in physical relationships with women (although not in relationship to thesexually explicit material) (N = 11)...

The subjects stated that porn use caused their ED. The average age was 25, yet 11 out of the 19 subjects experienced
erectile dysfunction and diminished libido with partners, but not with porn.


ARTICLE: Internet porn appears to be "sex-negative" for many users.

A growing number of young, healthy Internet pornography users are complaining of delayed ejaculation, inability to be turned on by real partners, and sluggish erections.

Lots of guys, 20s or so, can't get it up anymore with a real girl, and they all relate having a serious porn/masturbation habit. Guys will never openly discuss this with friends or co-workers, for fear of getting laughed out of town. But when someone tells their story on a health forum, and there are 50-100 replies from other guys who struggle with the same thing, this is for real.

Threads relating to this issue are springing up all over the Web on bodybuilding, medical help and pick-up artist forums, in at least twenty countries. Notice from one such forum:

Due to the overwhelming emails and requests we have received concerning pornography addiction and erectile dysfunction, we decided to create an entirely different thread. ED due to porn is becoming rapidly common, especially for young men.

Desperate young men from various cultures, with different levels of education, religiosity, attitudes, values, diets, marijuana use and personalities are seeking help. They have only two things in common: heavy use of today's Internet porn and increasing need for more extreme material.

Many have previously been to doctors, undergone various tests, and been declared "just fine" physically. Neither they nor their health care providers considered excessive porn use as a potential cause of their continued performance problems. Most were assured that "masturbation cannot cause erectile dysfunction." The final diagnosis was generally "performance anxiety."

Is anxiety really the cause? Here's a simple test: Try to masturbate (alone) using no porn and no fantasy—only sensual touch. Use the same speed and pressure as you would during intercourse. How erect is your penis without porn? If your penis is not fully erect, or it takes effort to become erect, then the chances are that anxiety is not the source of your problems. Persistent performance problems can certainly lead to anxiety, however. As one man said after he recovered following three months without masturbation or porn,

It's hard to tell where addiction ends and anxiety begins. I think a combination of the two is involved in a lot of situations.

Not long ago, Italian urologists confirmed an erectile dysfunction-porn use connection via a large survey. When interviewed about the survey, urologist Carlo Foresta (head of the Italian Society of Andrology and Sexual Medicine and professor at the University of Padua) mentioned that 70 percent of the young men his clinic treated for sexual performance problems had been using Internet pornography heavily. (Foresta has since apparently conducted another survey.)

The Italians are not alone. Other medical profesionals are beginning treat young healthy men who have developed porn-induced sexual dysfunction:

Recovery usually takes 6-12 weeks (many young guys are now taking much longer), and rests primarily on one factor: avoiding the extreme stimulation of Internet erotica. (Many also avoid masturbation for a time, either because at first they cannot masturbate without porn fantasy, or because climax triggers binging.)

Among those who recover, progression is surprisingly similar. Men typically report that after a few days of intense sexual cravings, their libido plummets and their penis seems "lifeless," "shrunken," or "cold." These "flatline" symptoms typically continue for up to six weeks on average, dependent upon age and intensity of porn use.

Gradually, morning erections return, followed by libido and, perhaps, occasional spontaneous erections. Finally, there is complete recovery of erectile health, sexual desire for real partners, sex becomes extremely pleasurable, and condom use is no longer problematic.

  • I am a 25-year old male, masturbating a lot from 13 and using porn from 14. Gradually, it took more to turn me on: bigger fantasies or harder porn, and I stopped getting hard without touching. During sex I would struggle to get an erection or keep it, especially for intercourse. Over the past 7 years I haven't held down a relationship, and the main reason for me has been this problem. Now the good news: When I realized the cause, I immediately gave up porn. Over the last 6 weeks I held off masturbating as much as I possibly could. (My best record was 9 days!) It all paid off. I just went away with a girl for the weekend and it was the best ever. I don't think I'm out of the woods yet. I still get pretty anxious from all the bad experiences over the years. But I just wanted to tell you all it can work, and it's well worth it!
  • Week 12, age 36 - I'm actually totally impressed how HUGE I get. It has been kinda hard to ignore. I mean, my erections are ROCK HARD and ENORMOUS. I remember asking other guys who went before me about when they noticed the return of their full erections. Well, I think I got mine back.
  • Since we wrote this PT post, a disturbing trend has emerged. Guys who used Internet porn during their adolescence often need longer to regain their erectile health, see - Young Porn Users Need Longer To Recover Their Mojo)

How can porn cause sexual performance trouble?

The cause appears to be physiological, not psychological, given that such diverse men change only one variable (porn use), yet report a similar recovery pattern. For these men, anxiety is secondary.

Recent behavioral addiction research suggests that the loss of libido and performance occur because heavy users are numbing their brain's normal response to pleasure. Years of overriding the natural limits of libido with intense stimulation desensitize the user's response to a neurochemical called dopamine.

Dopamine is behind motivation, "wanting" and all addictions. It drives the search for rewards. We get little spurts of it every time we bump into anything potentially rewarding, novel, surprising, or even anxiety-producing.

Animal models have established that both sexual desire and erections arise from dopamine signals. Normally, dopamine-producing nerve cells in the reward circuitry activate the sexual (libido) centers of the hypothalamus, which in turn activate the erection centers in the spinal cord, which send nerve impulses to the genitalia. A steady stream of nerve impulses, which release nitric oxide into the penis and its blood vessels, maintain an erection.

Nitric oxide in turn stimulates the blood vessel dilator cGMP, the on/off switch for engorgement and erection. The more cGMP is available the more durable the erection. So, the pathway from the brain to an erection is:

Reward circuitry (dopamine) > hypothalamus > spinal cord > nerves > penis

Erections start with dopamine and end with cGMP. Sexual enhancement drugs work by inhibiting the breakdown of cGMP, thus allowing it to accumulate in the penis. Yet if the patient's brain isn't producing enough signals in the first place, ED drugs will not increase libido or pleasure even if they (sometimes) produce an erection.

My ED is definitely porn-related because even erection pills do little but sometimes help enough to penetrate or get an erection. But, NEVER is the feeling good...because I still don't feel anything. I've lost most, if not all my sensitivity.

In the case of age-related erectile dysfunction, cardiovascular conditions or diabetes, the primary weak link tends to be the nerves, blood vessels and penis. However, for men with porn-induced erectile dysfunction, the weak link is not the penis, but rather the desensitized dopamine system in the brain.

The relevance of recent addiction brain science

In the last decade or so, addiction researchers have discovered that too much dopamine stimulation has a paradoxical effect. The brain decreases its ability to respond to dopamine signals (desensitization). This occurs with all addictions, both chemical and natural. In some porn users, the response to dopamine is dropping so low that they can't achieve an erection without constant hits of dopamine via the Internet.

Erotic words, pictures and videos have been around a long while, but the Internet makes possible a never-ending stream of dopamine spikes. Today's users can force its release by watching porn in multiple windows, searching endlessly, fast-forwarding to the bits they find hottest, switching to live sex chat, viewing constant novelty, firing up their mirror neurons with video action and cam-2-cam, or escalating to extreme genres and anxiety-producing material. It's all free, easy to access, available within seconds, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Overstimulation of the reward circuitry in the brain is a very real possibility today.

Many men don't realize their brain's sensitivity is declining toward normal sex because Internet erotica delivers endless dopamine hits—making erection and climax possible where normal encounters would not. When they try to have actual intercourse and cannot, they understandably panic.

The brain changes causing porn-induced erectile dysfunction arise from actual physical addiction processes (among them, numbing of the pleasure response of the brain). Quitting can therefore be quite challenging. In addition to an alarming temporary drop in libido, some men experience withdrawal symptoms: insomnia, irritability, panic, despair, concentration problems, and even flu-like symptoms. Finding a good counselor who understands addiction, and why today's porn has different effects from viewing a Playboy magazine, can be very helpful.

The brain needs a chance to "reboot," that is, return to normal dopamine sensitivity. This can take a couple of months. For a science teacher's explanation of the science behind porn-related erectile dysfunction, see this video presentation: Erectile Dysfunction and Porn.

Most men are astonished to learn that pornography use can be a source of sexual performance problems. Instead, many are becoming convinced that ED at twenty-something is normal. They are amazed that heavy porn use can affect them adversely, that no one told them it could affect them, and  that humans have actually masturbated without porn. There is almost total ignorance about the significance for porn users of the recent discoveries of addiction science.

If you are suffering from youthful ED, and wish to restore your potency, be optimistic. As one man said after his successful two-month experiment:

A few facts:

1. This is 100% fixable.

2. It will likely be one of the most difficult things you've ever done.

3. If you ever want a normal sex life again, you kinda don't have another choice.

4. If you started Internet porn at a young age the process can take longer (see - Started on Internet porn and my reboot (ED) is taking too long)


Comments

This article hits very close to home. My girlfriend and I recently tried having sex and it was a disaster. I could barely keep an erection and I couldn't ejaculate at all from intercourse. I eventually just masturbated to orgasm to prove to her that I could (hopefully this won't mess up my rebooting progress).

I know this is caused by my pornography addiction.

The good news is that I am making progress on kicking the habit. Basically I have gone 8 days/1 PMO event, then 7 days/1 PMO event, and currently up to 7 days no PMO. No binging during any of the previous 23 days and 2 instances of PMO. And, thankfully, it's getting easier to resist as well.

I imagine you have see this FAQ - Is my erectile dysfunction (ED) related to my porn use? http://yourbrainonporn.com/erectile-dysfunction-question

It contains several pages covering porn-induced ED.

This page is on rebooting with a partner.

http://yourbrainonporn.com/rebooting-with-a-partner

We can't really say how having sex will affect recovering from ED.

Good luck

Firstly, thanks so much for this site! So much useful and well thought out information.

I'm posting now, having been reading off and on for the past week. Boy, it's hard to know where to start!! I am almost day 14 of no P, and today is the first day I have had some craving\flashbacks, mostly due to being along and a little bored. However, revisiting this site gives me renewed discipline so that's great.

I'm 40 now but have not been in a serious relationship for a few years. It can obviously get lonely so it's easy to understand how PMO can provide that hit you need to feel better, numb the boredom, loneliness etc. Like most, I started with the mags, then graduated to DVDs, then high speed net brought a whole new dimension to the habit. At its worst it was 4-5 times a week, PMO. I looked at my online billing history the other day and it goes back to 04! I cancelled the 2-3 open subscriptions I had the day I found this place. This was just after I'd had ED problems with a girl I'd just met - and this wasn't the first time. I needed answers. It's been intermittent for a number of years, the ED, likely tied to how much P I was using at the time. It all makes sense to me now - the numbed brain response.

A friend once said to me "are you meeting any girls? You just don't seem interested." There's a lot to be said for that comment, as it stuck with me and I hadn't been able to work out why I just wasn't all that interested in the chase and generally, life has often seemed less interesting. Indifference seems to rule the roost!

I guess it was easier not to risk anything, risk getting burnt y'know; it was easier to just go home to the "girls". But even P of late wasn't doing it for me much, needing to find racier, raunchier stuff. I often felt guilty right after using. I never saw any of this as an addiction to be honest. A bit like going out for drinks, everyone does it, right?

A while back I did abstain from M for 2-3 weeks for other reasons and it did have a profound effect on my mood and general well being. In a nutshell, I wasn't as lazy when abstaining, that's for sure. But even after that realisation, I just lapsed straight back into the old ways of PMO.

There is a great section in a book called 'Think And Grow Rich' about Sex transmutation. Basically, it was about channelling sexual energy into more fulfilling pursuits and how many, many successful\wealthy men were able to do this. This also should have been a clue to me, but it got overlooked. The cravings and relapses into the easy world of P were just too strong.

Much like today, I know I'm going to be sorely tempted to have a look, just one small look but hopefully I can kick this thing for good and find myself a loving relationship very soon. It's been too long and I'm sick of being alone and feeling like this beast is controlling me and wrecking what's left of my life. The money and the hours wasted !!

I'm shocked to see that so many guys 15 yrs my junior have been hooked on this stuff for 10-15 yrs. For me the harcore P has really only been the last 7 or so years, but no more!

I consider myself a quite shy, reserved person at times but I figure that P has robbed me of some of what mojo I did have. I'm taking back the power!!l....so far so good.

In the last week or so I have had some murmurs of libido and morning erections, so that's positive. Will update again.

Good luck to all.

Your story succinctly describes the problem. It is frightening that so many guys today started young with daily use of hard core porn. Our next Psychology Today post will be: Teens and Porn - where we examine the vulnerabilities of the young brain.

Comment: Note that his potential girlfriend says that is seeing other men with this problem.

"I'm in deep dirt.... Yesterday the girl I'm in love with "she in love with me too" ASK me the deepest question ever over the phone.

She asks me have I ever had any problems getting it up. I paused on the phone for a second and flat out told her NO! She then asks me if I was being honest and I said "yea". Then she was like "oh okay, because men out here are having a problem getting it up sometimes if it's that's the case then that's a problem"

That's exactly what she said... So now I feel guilty for lying about this and I'm thinking about coming clean today because I don't wanna hit her with any surprises."

I have this exact problem except I don't have a penis.

When I read this it made me realize this is what I have been suffering. I did not know Porn was my problem. I have been looking at porn, and addicted to it since I was very, very young. I am only 24 and my love life is a struggle at best. My husband understands somewhat but I have never really been able to tell him what it was from, as I didn't tell him about my addiction. Mine started normal, where my sensitivity to touch decreased exponentially, since I started looking at porn. Also as the paper said, the porn I viewed also increased in "harshness". I used to get turned on over nakedness and now at a stage where I am concerned about my mental sanity.

I have a hard time achieving any type of orgasm without clitoral stimulation and some hard thought processing on my part. I miss being able to have sex and it feel good without much effort.

I have not looked at porn for a long time, and have just started again, and the time away did not increase my libido but might explain why i had no libido. I used to have a very extreme libido and could barely control it, now I don't even like being touched.

I think in my case, giving up porn and visual aids would be difficult and a long journey. I have a feeling it might be years before my sensitivity would come back, if that. Here is for hoping! Thank you for writing this and bring this to not only my attention but many others!

I hope the authors understand that women, along with men, use porn to masturbate too. In secret I bet women are pretty close to the amount and severity that men use and maybe that's why many women need some type of stimulation to achieve anything. Vibrators are the devil and I will be getting rid of mine, that's for sure.

I'm a woman and I have seen this happen to me. I've told my boyfriend , but he thinks I'm just over-reacting. The problem is I don't get stimulated like before. Caresses, kisses don't turn me on any more. I have to imagine sex scenes, to remember porn scenes. I'm determined to stop. Part of the matter is that

 I only watch online( I don't download because my sister uses my computer sometimes and I don't want her to find this stuff there; I'm pretty sure she doesn't watch and wouldn't understand it). It's a problem because porn these days has escalated and I see all kinds of stuff. There's just nothing that turns me on any more. I've seen to much. My boyfriend has old stuff downloaded on his computer. No anal ( he finds it disgusting), no swallowing, just normal sex or with oral. And I know he doesn't watch the parts with the oral that much because he usilly moves past them. I asked him about it and he said he's not that interested in the guy's pleasure...lol :)). It's about her pleasure ...hm...He's got tones of photos, though.

Maybe men could try looking at photos or they could try old stuff, like he has. Just try watching normal or does that have only oral, masturbating , and not heavy stuff, like threesomes, gang-bangs etc. He's too lazy to upgrade it. It's hard, I know. I don't even try watching other stuff, but it pups up on the sites, and nevertheless I think that I've desensitized myself in some way. I masturbate and I'm not interested in sex anymore. The problem is he is. I'm selfish because I don't want to wait until I see him. I just use porn.

Women don't watch in such high percentage as men and they don't actually have to be turned on to have sex. That's the problem with women not reporting this. You don't notice it until it's reached the point of not feeling anything at all when he penetrates you, and must of the times it's not the case. You can use lub and masturbate youself prior and it will be ok for women. It's just about the emotion..it's kind of gone..and I miss it.

What are the affects of porn addiction on women? I ask because I confided in one friend who was a girl about this issue. She told me she was addicted to pornography and erotic novels. She told me it became extremely challenging for her to orgasm with real life partners unless the situation was very similar to the porn she was into. But she also mentioned that even then it was challenging.

She recently sent me a message and I told her about my experience and what's been going on. I told her that the sexual problems I had before are non existent now, and I fully believe that they came about because of heavy porn use. Would recovery look different for women?

Porn use almost ruined my long term marriage and if my wife was not as strong as she is, it would have.  I have talked 4 other men about porn and ALL four admitted to me that they have been using porn and are to the point of using ED medication.  Now that I find the truth of the invasive nature of this and the courage to talk to others, I will continue to do so.

She wrote:

I am a woman and I can tell you from personal experience that women can be affected by it too. There was a period of time when I watched a lot of porn and found that my desire to have sex with my partner and to feel satisfied after having sex were greatly affected. I  stopped all porn veiwing and sex as gotten so much better! Now the only problem is that I want more of it!

Below is my attempt to lay down some of the key facts about this problem, since a lot of people have this problem on here, it’s important to me that you receive the facts, because only then can have an effective way to heal your problem.

Before I started my reboot I had years of trying to fix the problem because I thought it was sexual performance anxiety. I thought it was just my nerves getting the better of me. That’s why it took so long for me to find a solution since I thought I was just on an emotional level.

It was only around November last year that I really felt like my penis was dramatically less sensitive. That was the cue that my problem was not just Sexual Performance Anxiety but it was a physical problem too. How could a dramatic loss in sensitivity not be a physical problem? I could touch the tip of my penis and I didn’t feel much. Therefore the problem is also physical. That was when I started looking for a solution.

I have Sexual Performance Anxiety caused by my inability to get or maintain an erection with a real women, because my body has become desensitized to dopamine that is used to get and maintain an erection (Erectile Dysfunction), this is a physical problem. I believe people with my problem have both a metal and physical problem.

What is Erectile Dysfunction?

Wikipedia definition of ED: Erectile dysfunction (ED) is sexual dysfunction characterized by the inability to develop or maintain an erection of the penis during sexual performance.

Do people that have PMO’ed every day for years develop a problem with maintaining an erection during sexual performance?

Yes, we most certainly do. We can get an erection watching porn and masturbating but we can’t with real women. Some of us can’t even get an erection watching porn. That is due to some of the below problems relating to mostly the desensitization to dopamine and real women caused by too much porn, masturbation and orgasm. Therefore we have a type of erectile dysfunction (ED) since we can’t maintain an erection of the penis during sexual performance.

Do we have sexual performance anxiety?

I believe some of us including myself have 2 issues, one is Porn Induced ED the second is Sexual Performance Anxiety. My problem is starting to become more SPA then Porn Induced ED because I’m on the way to fixing the ED. How can someone have easy, good sex if they can’t get a sufficient erection due to the desensitization to dopamine caused by too much porn, masturbation and orgasm.

Is the problem physical and mental?

Below are symptoms of physical problems. From yourbrainonporn.com

The combination of the following leads to porn-induced erectile dysfunction:

1. Reward circuitry desensitization (addiction process),

2. Brain rewiring. or sensitization to Internet porn (addiction process),

3. Conditioning to a certain type of stimuli or delivery system (Pavlovian, rewiring, addiction process),

4. Death grip and rapid jerking (multiple levels of nervous system adaptation) You constantly need more stimuli, such as tighter grip and hardcore porn to get an erection. A vagina can’t create the death grip your nervous system as adapted too.

5. Have not yet wired to the real deal (men who started early with porn)

Both sexual desire and erections run on dopamine from the brain's reward circuitry. The dopamine-producing nerve cells in the reward circuitry activate the sexual (libido) centers of the hypothalamus, which in turn activate the erection centers in the spinal cord, which send nerve impulses to the genitalia.

When you watch PMO for years your body loses its sensitivity to dopamine. And since real women can’t give your body as much dopamine as porn website with 100 vaginas on the screen, you can’t develope and maintain an erection you stay limp even though you want to have sex.

Why do a reboot?

The biggest thing is that it will make your brain and nervous system more sensitive to dopamine that will help in having and maintain an erection during sex. This will then make it easier for you to have sex with a real women.

There are 100’s of cases of successful reboots in the below link.

What's it like to use porn after rebooting? | Your Brain On Porn

If you also have sexual performance anxiety that was caused by your inability to have an erection caused by too much PMO, will it be easier to cure SPA?

Well if you can finally develop a good erection to have good sex, yes i think so. That's because your body has increased its sensitivity to dopamine and your penis has more neves to feel a vagina. Make it easier to have successful sex and cure your SPA as well.

_______________

Day 51 of no porn masturbation orgasm

My libido has gone again It actually started yesterday. My penis isn’t alive like it was at the start of the week and im not on the prawl to just have sex. I think I’m flat lining again for the second time. My penis is exactly the same as it was couple of weeks ago. There is a case on here Age 29 - Day 89, two flatlines | Your Brain On Porn . Sucks but hey I’m here to see it through.

 - Life is Different Now, and I Feel Amazing!

Dear NoFap, After 33 days of NoFap, I feel absolutely amazing.

I started NoFap because of problems with ED. I am a college student, and the first time, and many times after I tried to hook up with girls, and have sex, I couldn't keep an erection. As a college kid, it was really upsetting, embarrassing and I felt terrible. Sadly, many people found out about it from gossip, and it just made everything worse. However, it wasn't until 33 days ago I was watching TED talks on /r/getmotivated, and found the one that talked about ED, and instantly started.

I had a little trouble in the beginning but after 21 days I started feeling great. Now that I'm back home from college, I have never felt so motivated and just all around great! While I still talk to many people, I have always had a little social anxiety, but now I have no problem with talking to anyone! I even have started p90x because I feel so great! Also, what makes it even better, is that I have a girlfriend now, and we have sex almost everyday. About 6 months ago I thought that I would never be able to have sex with anyone, and now almost every day for the past two weeks we have had sex.

Right now, I feel amazing, and wanted to tell everyone who is doing nofap that it is completely worth it, and reminding you that will feel amazing during and after the challenge. At first I didn't think it would work, but now after 33 days, I am so happy I stuck to it, because the results are outstanding, and my life is

LINK

For those of you out there whose junk is a little out of practice with real women, I was there too. I know my badge only says 4 days, but before this relapse I went 50 days. I had a girl sleep over last night, and I will never fap again. Not because I couldn't get it up or anything like that, but by nofapping you have nothing to worry about with ED and the moment just flows so much better. Being with real girls really is amazing. Your own touch can get you by, but the feel of being entangled with a woman is just amazing. Stay strong guys, it's worth it.

LINK -

I even had my brother mention YBOP, and porn induced ED to me when I first expressed to him that I was having issues, and I still convinced myself it was a million other things before it could possibly be porn. I think the biggest challenge with porn in this generation is how much 'conventional' scientific wisdom has ingrained in us that porn use is totally healthy. For most men, I feel like the second someone says "Porn might be causing these problems" we kind of assume "oh great, some religious moral absolutist trying to spout their bullshit at me."

Probably wouldn't be a virgin right now if it weren't for my Porn induced ED

I'm a 24 year old virgin but I believe I wouldn't currently be a virgin if it wasn't for this porn enduced ED that I have and all the confidence problems that come with it.

First time I had a chance with a girl was when I was 17 and long story short, she was naked on my bed but I couldn't do anything about it because I couldn't stay hard... pretty big punch in the stomach for a 17 year old. That encounter just crushed my confidence with women and I've always been afraid of taking things that far with women because I'm afraid the same thing will happen again. I've had numerous opportunities that I feel I kind of backed out of or didn't pursue with the same kind of confidence I would have if I didn't have that memory burnt into the back of my head telling me: "it'll just happen again".

Back then when I was 17 I was watching A LOT of porn and at the time I didn't know that the porn was causing this but since then I've realized that my ED is actually caused by my addiction to fapping to porn because one time I went to a family trip to a summerhouse for 2 weeks where I had no access to any sort of porn and since I was so used to fapping to porn I basicly couldn't fap without it... so I didn't fap at all! After the 14 weeks I noticed that I suddenly had no problems getting an erection that lasted forever and could fap with my imagination alone for a powerful orgasm (something I couldn't do before) and this effect seemed to last until I started watching porn again.

This was a true eye opener for me but I've tried several times to stop watching porn since then and always relapsed and never gotten beyond the 14 day mark, but now I've realized that I'm 24 years old and if I'm ever going to get my confidence back and finally lose my virginity I'm going to have to stop watching porn RIGHT NOW! I'm now telling myself this every single time I feel an urge coming on and that is a huge motivator for me, as well as visiting this subreddit and reading you guys' success stories.

100 day milestone! 1st time post.

Just wanted the community to know this. Here's my story:

  • 23 y/o male, been fapping since as long as I can remember, multiple times daily.
  • Have had some steady relationships in the past, never was able to O from BJs.
  • In a great relationship nearly 5 years now and decided to start NoFap after confronting so many young patients with ED issues in the pharmacies I work at. I could not comprehend how so many individuals at such young ages have ED issues, and the TED video made me realize this about myself as well, even scared me a little.
  • I have failed several times in the past since joining NoFap. My previous record was only 20-something days.
  • Throughout this journey my overall physique has greatly improved, have become a regular in a new gym I joined, bought a bike to ride everywhere now, and finished schooling for pharmacy.
  • My SO loves that I have started this and has noticed my performance boosts in bed. I can O from BJs now!
  • This decision has not been easy, but some days I come back on here and notice: "hey, I didn't know it was that long already!"
  • I still end up looking at porn from time to time, but my more obscure fetishes have subsided, which was really getting to me; another push to start NoFap.

Sorry about the ranting, feel free to ask me any questions!

ED, Even in the Most Ideal Circumstance

Notice a lot of men on this board have had an issue with porn addiction, which has lead to erectile dysfunction. My problem sort of bleeds into both worlds.

A few years ago, I found out an old high school friend of mine got into porn. I had always found them very attractive and even had a crush on them for a while, so I looked it up and thoroughly enjoyed myself.

Cut to now, I've actually had the opportunity of sleeping with this friend... and I can't get it up. I don't understand it. I can masturbate to them in a porn no problem. One on one, I get nothing. I know people say that the reason for loss of real-life intimacy is due to an addiction to the fantasy, but in this situation the real life friend IS the fantasy.

I feel like I've got an ideal situation here, and it's killing me that I can't for the life of me get it up!

There appears to be two types of porn-induced ED -Chronic, whioch takes months to resovle, and a type where recovery takes 1-2 weeks.

Thought I had ED, low testosterone, or something. Tried Viagra, but it seems that porn is the problem.

I made this post a few days ago: http://www.reddit.com/r/NoFap/comments/y5yab/yesterday_my_girlfriend_walked_in_on_me_while_i/ . Over the past few months I developed ED with my girlfriend. I thought something was wrong with me, I had too much stress, low testosterone, or something. The doctor prescribed me Viagra, which works. However, once you get onto something like that, it's hard to come off, because you don't think you can come off, because you're worried you won't be able to perform without it. Anyway, I tried not jerking before, but never thought that porn might be a problem. You see, I would often look at porn in the morning, maybe jerk a little and not climax. I thought that was okay, but I don't think it is. I also tried different supplements, zinc, horny goat weed, and lots of sleep/exercise.

This week has been one of the most stressful for me, I haven't exercised nor slept that well let alone eat a healthy diet or take my supplements. However, I did stop looking at porn. This morning, I was hard as a rock despite not taking any Viagra, and my girlfriend, who is now sensitive to my sexual needs offered to hook up. I was thinking to myself, WTF? How is it that I've such a raging hard-on despite all my stress and unhealthy lifestyle over the past few days? I think it's the starving my brain from porn that's doing it. There was a post yesterday by someone who said that jerking every once in a while when you're really horny is fine, as long as it's not done with porn. I think that this is correct. Rubbing one out when you're super horny and when your woman isn't around is probably a good thing so that you can just get on with your day.

The Cost of porn:

To be honest I think the root of my problem has been the internet, it has allowed me accessibility, anonymity and variety to any portal of sexual satisfaction. I am now hoping with you guys the internet can help me.

Financially= I have spent over £400 on porn sites etc and over £500 on cam sites (£2 per min...fuck me). On the recent escort saga i have done away with £460. I could of bought and made a decent gaming pc using r/buildapc when rome II and COH 2 come out.

Sexually= Probably my biggest incentive, worry, goal. At this moment i would not be able to have an orgasm during sex if i was wearing a condom. Bareback is slightly easier (feels amazing but still takes a while). I have faked orgasms aplenty and girls have commented on my stamina to keep going (both to enjoyment and disapproval). I just seem to be able to keep pumping away but to no avail. I once tried six times before i was able to orgasm with a condom

When i am with a girl i am finding that i am suffering from a little ED (not the aged vein type that men in their 60's get). Although when im having sex i am suitably hardish but i am not as hard as id want or expect to be (Im thinking why the hell cant i work properly when i have a hot naked girl with me).

I consider this to be down to physical and mental problems. Physically i have likely developed a death grip that has decreased my dicks sensitivity to mechanical stimulation both when im fapping and when i have penetrative sex. Mentally i have become so used to seeing digital girls on the internet that ive become desensitised as well so that when im with a real girl its no big deal to some of my limbic wiring.

I hear what your saying. I probaly also could afford that longtime postponed pc upgrade.

God damn this time this addiction actually escalated probably more than ever. I have memberships including shemalesites, dvd videos on order and also knowledge of those best free sites.
I also freaking spent 50€ in 10-15mins (25+25€). I went online 1 on 1 live cam with a shemale and actually gave her my phonenumber, what hell was i thingking?
Atleast during that i noticed this addiction getting hold over my actual brain because my body felt so weak due to dopamine spikes.

But the thing is, that those girlfriend stories in these porn addiction forums aren't at all helpful. I think they actually have "helped" me to fail my quest for abstince/sobriety which has gone longest about 1-3 weeks. I hope people writing those realize it and stop writing them.
I my self have had only 1 girlfriend my entire lifetime.
Allthough she was the most pretty and most wanted girl in school and she got to be my gf. Atleast those are some good memories.

But now things are hell alot worse. Im in my early twenties, few friends, no girlfriend/partner, unempolyed and without education.

I actually have went ballsout asking girls to cup of cafe at cashier and other non regular places and they simply rejected with "i have a boyfriend but thanks" thats really eating me. Therefore have just stayed with porn and havent really done any un-necessary interaction with people.

I dont drink, smoke or do drugs. I guess this pmo has been my drug.
Luckily no one knows about it and everyone in my family keep saying how good i've handled things, especially my grandma since others are using drugs and some even in detoxification.
I read on the internet that you need to talk about this addiction but i just really cant talk to my family about it and therefore has to be some other option.

Look under the support tab for furms.

Good luck

 264 days after giving up PMO.

I have not had any incidents where I was unable to obtain and maintain erection during sexual activity.

Sometimes I mentally get a little doubtful of myself being able to get erect without issue, but I contribute that to years of struggling with erection issues.  The doubtfulness is going away.

Rebooting works!!!

I'm just making this post to tell everyone here that no fap has officially cured my porn induced ED. Last night I had PIV sex with a girl, and I had the first orgasm in my entire life where I didn't have to finish using my own hand. Also: it was awesome. I'm planning on writing a post on my whole experience (the good, the bad, the ugly) when I hit day 90. (LINK)

Anyway, the point is, if you're here for porn-induced ED reasons, I'm telling you to try this out, because it worked for me.

My previous streak before this one was my longest at 19 days. Even though I relapsed, I feel like I still am making great progress. On the 7th day of this current streak, 2 days ago, I hooked up with this girl. The following might be NSFW in terms of triggering a relapse, but I'll try to be blunt and not too descriptive.. lol.. (LINK)

Fapping for years and years before this has made it difficult for me to maintain an erection during sex, especially with a condom on. However, when I was with this girl, I was able to maintain an erection for as long as I wanted. We switched to 4 different positions and I was able to stay hard even when pulling out and taking our time with moving to a different position. Also, I was very hard inside her even with the condom on and made her orgasm 4 times in those 4 different positions, mostly with just my penetration and stiffness. Surprisingly, I didn't come prematurely either. I was able to hold back and focus on pleasuring her, and let myself come when I felt she had a couple of nice O's already. The sensitivity even with the condom on was amazing, and it actually took conscious effort not to come so fast.

After we took a break, I was able to get another erection very quickly from just her lightly touching me there and kissing and cuddling. Getting it up so soon after an orgasm like this has not happened for me in a long time. We were able to go another round with a condom on again and it was just as amazing with no ED issues and a mind-blowing orgasm for me that I felt all throughout my body.

The whole time also I was turned on by my passion for her and connection with her, not just the visual stimulus of her beauty. It was a slow lovemaking session, not fucking, and I completely gave myself over to the physical sensations of being one with her. I wasn't trying to get myself off, I was making a deep connection with her.

This experience has got me all excited and feeling like the healing process is working. I am 34 yrs old, and I had my doubts before about whether my ED would ever get better, but all I can tell you is trust in the process, it will produce results eventually. Keep fighting the good fight, fellow fapstronauts!

Having ED troubles. Should I begin my nofap journey?

I'm a pretty healthy 20 year old, who for the past few years was ruled by porn (progressed from regular porn to animated porn, fetish porn, you name it). I noticed recently that I've been unable to get erect, whether it's for masturbation purposes or for fooling around. My ED may be due to my early masturbation techniques (squeezing my penis and not letting it get fully erect) This problem has gotten worse now that I have a gf, as she thinks her appearance is the problem, and it's not. Will a period of abstinence from porn and masturbation help my problem?

30 Days, or "Holy hell, it works."

Context: late 20s, starting from total ED/lack of libido. I have a longtime GF, and my low sex drive (but somehow not too low to fap) was taking a very painful toll.

RECAP:

Weeks 1-3: Experienced the clear-headedness and confidence that some have described, enjoyed having more time (quit gaming simultaneously), but other than that, total flatline. No sexual desire. But I wasn't too concerned, because that's where I was starting from.

Week 4: Spontaneous boner just thinking about sex. For the first time since ... I literally cannot remember when. If low libido is not a challenge you face, it's hard to describe just how magical this feels.

Later in week 4: Started working out daily (run 2 miles + either lifting or abs), taking 4g L-Arginine daily (seems like taking it with food, esp. bread, helps prevent the heartburn), and doing some kegel exercises. This combo really helped things take off. I've had sex with the gf twice in the last week or so, which is itself an improvement, but both times have been unlike ever before. It's more exciting, and easier to get excited. I last longer. It feels more connected (she spontaneously mentioned this after the last time).

I'm glad that I didn't start the physical regimen until after I had started to regain some function, if only to clarify the importance of NoFap in this equation. NoFap gets your mind right, exercise gets your body right, good things happen. (Don't know how much impact the Arginine is having, but it can't hurt.)

I know there may be more flatline periods in my future, but that's fine. I'm in it for the long haul. Keep the faith, Fapstronauts.

tl;dr NoFap + Exercise + Kegels + Arginine = faster results than I expected.

40 days then reset--my body's vastly different reactions to sex and PMO

I started nofap for pretty typical reasons. I saw the TED talk, visited YBOP and realized that a lot of my ED problems and relationship problems were due to fapping constantly for the last 20+ years (I'm 36).

I lasted about 40 days before PMO. (I'm resetting now, so if my badge still says 48, the reset just hasn't gone through yet). Before reset I experienced the following effects:

  • Major increase in energy and libido
  • After the first week, steady improvement with ED issues
  • After two weeks, disappearance of ED issues
  • A brief flatline of about 5 days somewhere during the third week
  • Increased confidence (although I attributed that to the ED getting better--I was no longer afraid of taking a woman home and not being able to perform)
  • Found it much easier to look people in the eyes and hold their gaze

That last one was the only really surprising one. I kind of expected the rest based on what I had learned and common sense, but had discounted a lot of the "I'm now a sexual magnet!" and "I can sense ovulating women from miles away!" kinds of superpower claims. But I did see someone point out the eye contact thing a few weeks ago on nofap, and it was definitely true for me.

Anyway, I was pretty sexually active during this time. I didn't have sex for the first 8 or 9 days, but then started having sex a couple times a week for the rest of the time. My sexual performance had definitely improved. I was no longer constantly worried about losing my erection so I could take my time. It was all a lot more enjoyable, too. I didn't last as long, but that wasn't a problem, since I'd always lasted too long before and now I was going for just about the right amount of time for the most part (there was maybe once that I came too quickly, but it was fine--we just had sex again soon after).

Eventually I relapsed. I won't bore you with the details, but it was pretty typical. I let my guard down and then proceeded to PMO three or four times over the course of about a day.

The crazy thing for me was how substantially different the effect was from fapping than it was from sex. When I'd had sex, I felt satisfied afterwards, and happy, but my sexual appetite returned pretty quickly. I still had "the fire." After PMO I felt satisfied and happy as well (just speaking the truth), but my sexual appetite didn't return. I had a desire for more PMO, but the fire was gone--I had less energy, lower libido, less attraction to women, less energy, etc.

It's now been almost a week and things are starting to get back to where they were before, thankfully. In a way, I'm glad I relapsed, because I got to really experience the drastic difference between PMO and real sex. I knew PMO had been holding me back, but until this happened, I still kind of harbored this feeling in the back of my mind that the benefits I was receiving just came from reducing the number of orgasms, not actually reducing the amount of porn and masturbation. Turns out, I was wrong.

I know this is long, but I just wanted to add one thing--I'm incredibly grateful to have found this subreddit, and to all of you. It's increasingly clear to me now that several excellent relationships I've had in the past have failed in large part because of PMO. I find myself single at 36, which isn't the worst thing in the world, but not where I thought I'd end up. Some people never do. For all you guys who are getting onto this in your college years or early twenties, count yourselves lucky. Actually we should all count ourselves lucky, even the older dudes. I sometimes start feeling sorry for myself and regretting the issues PMO has caused in my life, but then I look on the bright side--at least I've finally figured this out. There's always time to turn things around. So, thanks.

tl;dr I was on nofap for 40 days, but having sex. The sex would leave me satisfied, but my sexual appetite would come back quickly. Then I fapped, and my libido disappeared again and I lost "the fire" completely. A week later it's starting to return.

I've never confessed this to anyone before, but I'm a real porn addict and I'm in need of serious help.

Basically for seven years of my life I've discovered the thing that helped propel the internet age forward. Porn. I am a 23 year old male. But before you shoot me down as it being 'normal' or 'healthy to masturbate' I'm quite certain my own personal story isn't of that sort.

Everyday it seems, it has gotten progressively worse, and I can no longer simply enjoy doing normal menial tasks without thinking of running to the nearest computer or electronic device with internet access, and pulling up a porn site and tugging away. I can't sit in my college classrooms or stand around at my job for more than thirty minutes without my mind wandering off and thinking about that one video I saw last night and how I couldn't wait to get out and get off.

I tend to masturbate three to five times a day while surfing the internet for just the right video for near countless hours each time I do. I recently have found someone whom I can finally call my own and cares for me on a deeper level. We've been dating for only a couple months now, but when we have sex, I have a difficult time maintaining an erection. My brain wanders off and tries to come up with a video I've seen on the internet, but I immediately try to dismiss it because I have this beautiful person in front of me that I'm making love to and wouldn't want to associate our personal time with superficial nonsense.

I've tried it all, blocking sites, blocking sexy links. But to no avail my head goes into a hypnotic trance right when I see someone I just want to splurge all over, and In a world where our media, advertisements, and everyday experiences has people walking around mostly naked, it sets me off quickly and turns me into some kind of lustful beast. I've used my smartphone on multiple occasions to view porn, run into a public restroom stall and take a load off. It's killing me, my mind feels weak and I constantly feel paranoid as though people know and look down on me for it.

I need help reddit, I don't know what to do. This is the first time I've told anyone about it, and finally accepted it as a problem. It's interfering with my ability to have a normal productive and happy life. I'm starting to fall head over heels for my significant other, and has been the reason I felt the need to seek help, but I feel if I don't do anything soon to improve our sex life, I would be devastated.

TL;DR: I watch countless hours of porn and masturbate, obstructing my daily tasks and love life. I don't know where else to turn.

Sexually damaged after years of watching porn?

OK, short and embarrassing story.. i've probably been exposed to porn for .. 13-14 years or so (i'm 27), never fapped daily but when i did it was almost always with porn, or images from porn playing in my head.. well, what its done to my brain i don't know, but its been harder and harder getting/holding an erection from watching porn and my sex life is non-existing. the last times i've had sex my head was running wild and i couldn't concentrate or getting horny at all. so after those embarrassing episodes i've stayed away from sex, even starting to believe i was gay, which I'm pretty sure i'm not. I have also told myself that it was all because of the weed smoking i've been doing the last years, but even that haven't been really frequent (maybe once a week or less).

So, yes.. what were i talking about.. since porn don't do it for me anymore and i've always been shameful about watching it i decided to google around and ended up here. May i have become sexually damaged from the years watching porn? When fapping away for hours with out getting an orgasm something surely must be wrong.

Anyway, i've decided to stop all that and see what happens.. no more fapping and no more porn.. What i hope to achieve is feeling happier, getting more motivated to get stuff done, and overall feel healthy, inside and outside. Maybe some day in the future getting confident enough to go forward when i'm interested in a girl and not being that passive person i have become.

I can hardly feel my penis. Anyone else's dick completely ruined?

This is why I'm trying NO Fap. It gets worse as I abstain. At about 7 days the dead dick gets major but everything else gets amazing.

I am going to get the 90 days done. No fucking around now.

GUY 2

Flatline means PROGRESS.

Also keep in mind that there is no " trying" - you either go with 100% motivation to do it or you dont (and will probably fail ).

But as long as you dont give up and start all over there is no true failure.

GUY 3

70 days and it's still dead 50% of the time. Which is much better than 100% when I started. It's a slow uphill climb but it gets better. Avoid stresses, eat clean and get plenty of sleep.

GUY 4

It comes back to life eventually, and raging harder than ever. For now use the time to focus on other things that could improve you.

Original Poster

Amazing. Thanks so much guys.

Do you get my point though? I not only have dead dick during no fap, but I'm actually trying to CURE a permanently dead dick by doing no fap.

It must be porn and MO that's caused it because I get all the withdrawal symptoms and the really good stuff (confidence, strength gains, sensations in my jaw, amazing skin etc).

 

 

I just became aroused thinking about the girl i'm seeing naked. Feels good man.

I used to not be able to get aroused unless porn was present. Seriously. I couldnt even masterbate without porn. I would never go back to that slavery.

GUY 2

"I used to not be able to get aroused unless porn was present." Idem dito here, feels bad man.

GUY 3

Same here. I actually just reset my badge and I don't feel ashamed at all. I fapped thinking about my wife naked instead of watching porn for the first time in a very long time. Feels good.

GUY 4

Ha. Yeah. I've got a boner a good 50% of the day now...

GUY 5

Same, man. I always needed porn to get off. Can't wait until that shit is off my mind.

GUY 6

Isn't this amazing stuff?! I am with you man.

From Reddit NoFap: (He still has delayed ejaculation)

Recovery from ED, found a girlfriend and new energy thanks to no fap

So i am on day 48, and boy oh boy my life has changed. Let me give you the run down on how i was before no fap. I am a hard working student who studies law and commerce. I had many friends and many friends who were girls, however i never seemed to get anywhere with chicks. When i was younger, say 16 or so, i would love to pick up as many chicks as i could. I became quite good at it, but never went past second base. Went i started getting older, and getting into a terrible PMO cycle, my drive to find girls and pick them up almost stopped. When i did manage to some how pick up chicks, i had ED issues which was embarrassing for me and her.

Let's fast forward to day 48 of no fap. I have just had more sex in the last 2 days then i have had in my entire life. I have met an amazing girl that i am really attracted to. My ED has vanished, and i mean vanished, i had sex for about 3 hours the first time and was hard for all of it. (for some reason i haven't cum yet, does anyone else have the same issue?). I feel like a man again, with more confidence, better skin and more attraction to women in general.

Come on guys, its 48 days (for me, may be longer for others) man the fuck up and do it, it changed my life.

Indeed, delayed ejaculation is your issue.

Had the same problem, ran into YBOP while googling for solutions. Got over it - even when using a condom. You should know that even if your GF is initially happy that you last 1, 2, 3 hours at sex, she will eventually become annoyed by that 'performance' and it will become an issue. Keep up with the nofap challenge and eventually you will find the cure for DE.

Best of luck! (LINK to thread)

Do hard erections return?

GUY1) Yes, rock hard erections return. You have to stay totally away from PMO and you have to be patient. When I started getting hard erections again, I would have one and then maybe the next time I had sex I might not even be able to get an erection.  I'm over 100 days now and the hard erections are getting much more consistent.

GUY 2) yes they do!!!! mine are so much harder after 2 months i cant remember the last time they were so hard. sometimes they last for 5 minutes without touching..

GUY 3) Sometimes mine get so hard it actually physically hurts. Feels like my penis is about to explode.

For me, my lowest point wasn't when watching porn. It was December 2011 and I went through 2 days of crushing depression. I don't suffer from depression, but for thos two days I felt like crying the whole day and had absolutely no appetite. What was worse was that I was staying at a friends house - so even social stimiluation did nothing. I was struggling to hold back the tears, going to the toilet every few hours for a quick cry.

I ended up taking an anti-depressant pill (just 1) and that kicked me out of it. It was then I realized that my life was fucked up and I needed to do something - the problem was I had no idea what. I started searching the net for the next few months. I started to look into cures for everything I was experiencing. Depression, social anxiety, performance anxiety, ED, etc... Eventually, I somehow stumbled onto YBOP and after reading about 3 recovery accounts I was certain this was my issue. I went 30 days PMO free but eventually relapsed after convincing myself I was fine (the good mood I was in thanks to not using porn ironically made me think it wasn't the porn that was the problem)

After that I started PMO again, usually every other day or every 3 days - but sometimes multiple times in one night. I ended up convincing myself I just needed to get laid (still a virgin) and went to an escort. I didn't even get remotely hard, and that's when I knew I had to abstain. I just had to. Porn got me hard really easily, but not a hot escort naked on top of me? WTF. I didn't even really feel that nervous at the time, but nothing. That day I started abstaining again and 8 weeks later - here I am.

(LINK to thread)

My lowpoint?

Laying there naked next to the most beloved woman in my world (my wife and mother of my children), about to have sex, and not being able to get an erection. She looks me straight in the eye and asks me if I'm having trouble because I'm looking at porn again.

And I lie, right in her face.

Something inside me f*cking died, right then and there...  :'(

On the other hand - something was born: my absolute KNOWING that I was an addict, and I needed to do something about it. Which is why I'm here. (LINK to thread)

My lowest point was when I took stock that I couldn't get it up for my girlfriend (now ex-girlfriend) not once, but repeatedly over the course of our three year relationship. We also never orgasmed from vaginal intercourse (I think I have deathgrip syndrome apart from porn-induced ED) for THREE years!

I was working on the issue (visiting doctors; buying books on penis exercises; trying to change habits by masturbating to POV porn (instead of the extreme porn I was addicted to)); she was totally supportive of me the entire time (this girl really loved me with all her heart). She even bought nice lingerie and made efforts to be the "slut in the bedroom". BUT even with that, I wasn't turned on because the porn I was into was much more extreme than that (rape, forced sex).   

When the relationship was over, her sexual confidence was rock bottom; she didn't feel that she was an attractive woman (though objectively she is definitely hot). To harm someone you love so deeply is a terrible, terrible feeling.

I wish I could turn back the clock and found yourbrainrebalanced sooner. Thank you Underdog this is a great site.

(LINK to thread)

I'm new to NoFap and I'm relieved to have found you

Hi there,

after reading lots of your stories about your willpower and determination, as well as getting information from YBOP, I decided to subscribe to this subreddit. I am really impressed with what's going on here.

I actually feel terrible about my fap habits and I suffer from ED and PE for 12 years already, while still being in my twenties. This is actually the first time I ever talk/write about this because I am deeply ashamed about it. This simply can't be right and I was often looking up articles on the internet but didn't find a solution.

So I stumbled upon this subreddit and I must say it gives me a lot of hope to read about your devotion. I already feel good for choosing NoFap. I hope to be a good fellow fapstronaut and i hope you welcome me aswell.

Eventually, I'd like to ask you folks something. Did you or do you get any help by a therapist? I always thought about this but never even dared to call one and ask for help concerning my ED and PE. Stay strong NoFappers!

"My girlfriend just ridiculed my NoFap attempt. I don't know what to make of it. . ." [UPDATE]

So fellow Fapstronauts, I have an update to the dilemma that rocked me to my core a few days ago (here's the link if you want to read it http://www.reddit.com/r/NoFap/comments/yqasw/my_girlfriend_just_ridiculed_my_nofap_attempt_i/)

I decided to mention it to her again this morning, after having a rather wonderful night last night. I mentioned to her that I'd come to the conclusion that my ED problems had come from years of porn-induced PMO and excessive amounts of it. This time around there was no ridicule. She was very understanding, very loving even. My best guess is that it was her way of apologizing (she has a hard time apologizing verbally, though I know when she's apologizing with her body language). I let it known that I want her support. I don't necessarily need it, but support from your partner is very important. I told her that I want to go back to how things used to be, where I could naturally have an erection and make love, not fuck but make love, real passionate love. She was happy that I was taking charge. I told her that I didn't want her to be an object to me, but a willing partner. In short, it went well, not better than I wanted, but well. I'm happy. I don't know what motivated her ridicule, but I'm happy she's supportive now.

I love you all Fapstronaut. Your concern and supportive words actually brought me to tears :'). I can't thank you all enough. NoFap is exactly what I needed to get me started on this journey to health and self-control, among other things.

I'm happy to see the #1 badge. I made 6 days, with my 7th day being tomorrow. It was difficult, but I did it and I'm fucking proud of myself. I haven't PMO'd, fapped, edged, nothing. I'm happy and feeling great with the marked rise in my general libido and whatnot. The future looks bright.

PS. That day she ridiculed me, I didn't fap. I called up my best friend, we grabbed a beer and had a good chat. I told him about NoFap and my problems and he was incredibly supportive. Very understanding, sympathetic and empathetic. It felt great.

tl;dr Told gf about NoFap, she was supportive after being horrible about it. Gunnin' for more days!

I've been at this for almost 10 years. This is it

Hey guys, I just want to say a huge Thankyou this morning. Here's my story:

I first saw porn when I was like 8 and I heard the word 'boobs' so being a giggly little kid, my brother and I went to boobs(dot)com, clicked through the 18 or older banner and laughed at what we saw. It was at 11 or so that I really started to get into porn back in the Kazaa days. Hahahaha man I can't believe how long ago that was. You guys even remember that?? I remember downloading like 25-30 pornographical items in the Que at once. I must have been at it at least every other day for three years when I finally felt guilty about sneaking around and I decided to quit.

That was 9 years ago next month. Day after day of telling myself that "Oh you're going to quit. This is a tiny little thing, not even worth your energy to worry about. Let it slide this time and you can crush this thing tomorrow." Weeks turned into months and it saddens me to say into years.

BUT ITS OK! It’s not affecting me and once I quit, it will be gone with no signs it was ever here. Besides how else are you going to learn what 69 is and what a clit is and what circumcised means when everyone at the HS lunch table looks at you. Fast forward to last year. I made a home made flesh-light cuz I figured why not up the sensations. It's the same as jacking off. I lasted 15 seconds. WHATTT??

I then went online and realized all that fapping with the subconscious thought to not get caught over the years trained me to bust quickly….. SO YOU’RE TELLING ME if I would have never done this SH*T, I could be lasting 30 min to an hour by now, from the accumulated practice???

Fast forward to 4 months ago. I was still PMO’ing and not really getting much of an erection during it.... That's weir-………….. OH SHIT. Why the F*** do I have ED. WTF is this? I finally found the TED talk on Youtube and through that found you guys; and realized my case is nothing special. I searched all of /r/NoFap and I kept finding other apparently, clones of myself.

I woke up this morning, Day 4, all my will power gone. It’s the funniest and maybe scariest thing, having your own body turn against you. All your strength and energy that was put into quitting on Day 1 is day by day, turning on you; strangling you to give in to it and it will let go. I felt like Venom from Spiderman when he’s trying to rip it off but it won’t go, wanting to consume him. As I read that mature guy’s post about being mid-thirties and having it ruin his life, I got a renewed motivation that I am GOING to kill this thing once and for all. Thank you guys, for encouraging each other and me through this journey. It’s day 4 and I’m going to use this as my new headline when I wake up everyday:

I'm a Male 17 and have been trying to do the NoFap challenge for around a month leading up to last friday, but never without going more than 1 or 2 days due to my pretty low self-control and the excuses that i kept making up for myself. (LINK)

So this last friday after a party, i (still a virgin) hooked up with a girl that i had met and talked with a few parties before this one. We didn't kiss or anything at the party, but decided to her place, with me jokingly using the fact that my last bus home (20 km) had already gone (which was actually true), as an excuse.

We got to her place, continued to just casually chat for about an hour or two maybe, but once we got around to sleeping, i made a move and started kissing her neck and gently rubbing her. Things escalated, and next minute i was laying there, for the first time, with a smokin' hot girl doing all sorts of things. And i really mean all sorts of things.

I imagine most peoples first time as being super awkward and over quickly. Well, not in my case, thanks for my weakness when trying to do the NoFap challenge. After what seemed like at least an hour of various positions including oral and handjobs i had satisfied her, but me, i just couldn't get off. I was so suprised that this was actually the case, and that it was this bad. I had ALWAYS imagined that it would be exactly the opposite when the time came, but no. No matter how heatful it was and what we did, i just couldn't finish. When we decided to stop, and we had started to get tired, i was really fucking annoyed and somewhat emberrassed, but she took it pretty well.

The day after i just left with a sort of empty feeling inside me, knowing that it could have been the night to remember, but due to my low self control beforehand, only got to be a somewhat half-assed experience on my part.

So since that i haven't fapped, and i don't plan on it. I can't wait to finally get this new lifestyle kickstarted. :)

TL;DR: Had the most beautiful and awesome first time sex, but couldn't finish due to my addiction to fapping.

How I figured to become ED free

23/m ED for many years

If you have ED you have to sit down and think all logical reasons how to sort it out.

The checklist I made.

  1. Doctor(Could of been an illness like diabetes, however I was all healthy)
  2. Stop fapping...even edging
  3. Stop porn
  4. Hit gym
  5. Eat heathly

I did all these but missed out number 3. Took me 3 months of nofap to figure it out. It is amazing the difference that no porn has made on me. Literally boners happening all the time. Confidence in bed up 100%.

I think the thing is to find what your problem is. I also found getting your girlfriend on the pill a big help so you don't have to fuck around with condoms. Also made sure the bedroom was warm and found out I have better erect at night time. Put everything together for better success rate and now I am pretty confident all the time

So go ahead guys figure out how you can get better too. I DID IT IN 3/4 MONTHS OF NOFAP THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR HELP!!

Day 39 - Recovering from second flatline & ED issues

On Day 28, I thought I had fully recovered from my first flatline. Successful PIV intercourse. ED seemed to be gone.

Ha. A couple days later I ran into another flatline. Dead dick, no libido. It lasted for close to a week.

Until yesterday. No ED, initiated sex (it's been a long time since I had the confidence or libido to do that; wife was always the one initiating in the last 6 months to a year except for a couple of times) and it was great.

I understand I may run into other flatlines, but if I can recover like this again, I'm fine with that.

tl;dr: 30, in long term relationship (6+ years), PMO'd for 15 years. Had ED issues for the last 6 months which are fading.

GUY 1) Do you feel almost asexual?

GUY 2) Of course, I don't have the natural tension between females anymore. My brain is so fried from years and years of PMO.

GUY 3) Same here. The tension is all intellectualized for me, I am second-guessing whether I am actually attracted to a girl or not. I don't know how to respond.

LINK

What is a successful reboot?

GUY1)

My reboot is also driven by wanting to cure my ED. For me it has been a vicious cycle. Go to have sex > ED > performance anxiety > fear of failure > avoid having sex. I want to have sex, I really do, but I don't want to in the fear of my ED. I want to get to the stage where my horniness returns, where I take a girl home and actually have 100% desire to have sex with her, rather than worrying about whether my penis will work or not.

GUY2)

For me it is to cure my copulatory ED. I'd really like to be able to have sex with my wife again. My wife would really like to have sex with me as well. My actions have hurt our relationship for far too long and I am aiming to rectify the situation.

GUY3)

that's what i am here for, too! getting rid of that ED and have normal and healthy sex again. i think a successful reboot would be to actually feel your sex drive again and your brain tells you to go for the real deal.

Today my girlfriend and I, (though it's been happening for a while) engaged in Karezza (Sex without orgasm)...and it was so successful. The best part? I know it was all down to NoFap. 40 minutes long....All down to Kegel

Contradiction in the title I know, but hear me out!

So yes, today my girlfriend and I engaged in intercourse.

A couple of things to note.

  1. being 47 days in, I found myself very horny for the past week. Nothing major, just generally refreshed.
  2. My girlfirend knows I'm doing NoFap to cure PMO addiction aswell as ED. Which makes me very comfortable.
  3. About 3 weeks ago I climaxed during sex...only after about 10 seconds!

So yes, the factors that occured, I noticed when we got down to business, I was ready, not 100 percent hard. But definitely enough to get things going. Then, about a minute in, I could feel myself ready to finish! I pulled out, breathed deeply for 5 seconds or so...and then carried on, performing kegel like actions throughout.......(Bear in mind this was without protection so I was getting the full feeling!)

The result? Possible NSFW.......text I want to hide For the first time during sex...actual sex, my girlfriend climaxed! She was amazed, it had never happened like that, not only once, but 3 times! the whole time my little man stayed happy and just kept on giving.

It get's better, after 40 minutes, she tells me she's completely satisfied, and doesn't want to ruin my nofap reboot. As sex without orgasm can be a real help!

Overall a complete success.

What I suggest.

DAILY ECERSIZE, EVEN SHORT SMALL ECERSIZES, TO MAKE YOU FEEL ON FORM AND ALERT.

KEGEL EXERCISES TO STRENTHEN ERECTIONS/PRESERVE ORGASM.

CONFIDENCE IS A MUST, make sure you're comfortable with everything.

AND FINALLY DO NOT FAP. I suggest K9 web protection

It dawned on me, that I really want to return to strong erections....I want it so bad that when my brain wants to look at porn, I now have the abilty to say....hell no....everythings good at the moment, think of how it would effect me.

WE SIMPLY TO NOT NEED THAT SHIT KNOWN AS PORN.....IT'S TRUE. IF YOU WANT TO DO NOFAP...YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS......IF YOU WANT TO DO 90+ DAYS, YOU TELL YOURSELF THAT. If not then your brain has won......

If you want success you need to earn it. This isn't a walk in the park....after 2 years of trying I know!

Now I'm constantly having erections whenever I see real women - 38 days

Guys, I've went from one extreme to the complete other now. Instead of only getting real erections when reading erotica or watching porn, I'm constantly going schwing whenever I see a real woman.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing? I'm hoping it's a good thing.

He answers another post

I'm 12. My brain is fluctuating so much at this state of puberty it literally threw away the pathway affected by porn.

I don't think he's coming across as condescending at all, not for me anyway. If anything it's the pro-porn pundits around here that sound rather condescending, even aggressive at times. I've noticed too how some people try and spin the argument while deliberately taking other peoples points out of all context, like saying there's nothing wrong with sex or looking at naked bodies.

Of course there's nothing wrong with sex and looking at naked bodies, that's only natural. A healthy libido is a good thing. But this is what I base part of my argument on against porn, among other things that I've already made quite clear in various threads I've started on these forums. Internet pornography is creating a generation of young men who are hopeless with women.

Over exposure to porn causes a de-sensitising to real sex with a women, so many men are increasingly unable to become aroused by the women in their lives. It's known as 'Porn-Induced Sexual Dysfunction' and explains the loss of libido towards real women caused by continuous over-stimulation of viewing porn. Why is impotence sharply on the rise?

I'm not saying it's all down to pornography, there's also other pieces to the puzzle. But by repeatedly viewing pornography on the Internet you're basically overdosing on dopamine. And with each new thrill the brain loses its ability to respond to dopamine signals, meaning that porn-users demand increasingly harder material to become sexually aroused. Thus the continuous over-stimulation of dopamine through looking at porn effects libido.

I don't say that because I'm religious, it's a fact. Erotic pictures and art have been around for centuries, but the Internet is relatively new, and makes possible a never-ending stream of any type of porn imaginable. Maybe that's why more and more young men need Viagra to get it up?

Embarrassing question about ED turning into possible stage fright...does it get better? Also, does it ever get back to the point of just being able to get hard by just kissing etc.?

So porn definitely caused ED issues with me in terms of what it takes to get aroused.

But I also feel like this has led into some sort of actual stage fright problem, where if I'm about to get with a girl I'm so in my head about not getting hard that it literally feels like my dick is getting smaller out of fear.

It fuckin sucks. Has anybody here had experiences like this? Does fixing the ED by stopping the porn help with the whole stage fright/confidence issue? Is it ever possible to just have the "natural" reaction to fooling around again, which is getting hard as a rock just by making out etc.?

GUY 2)

This might not be super helpful to you, but my first time (July 14th) I had semi-ED due to performance anxiety. The next few times after that I didn't have a problem, and I'm always getting hard just from a bit of making out. I'm on Day 72 of NoFap and Day 342 of NoPorn, so it might take a while of being clean before your ED goes away.

GUY 3)

I'm not a doctor, but I speak from experience.

It's possible for previous ED to trigger performance anxiety, but the good news is it can be treated rather easily. If the problem is no longer physical (your reward circuit being overloaded), but psychological, then Viagra or Cialis would work. A sexologist would most likely prescribe some pills for you to take in the first couple of times, a sort of "crutch" for your penis and confidence. After you've successfully had sex and your confidence is regained, you'll no longer need the pills.

 

Is fapping really the problem or is it the porn?

My friend masturbates like 10-15 times a day. Not even exaggerating. He seriously has an addiction, but he thinks its normal. He also doesnt have internet access, so he never really gets to watch porn either. And he's never had a problem keeping it up in bed. On the other hand, I can't remember the last time I masturbated without looking at porn. But I might masturbate only 4-5 times a week on average. And I have tremendous issues staying hard. At first I thought it was nerves, but after getting more acclamated with sex, I actually found sex to be tiring and boring. Unless the girl was deepthroating me and telling me to choke her, I don't really find sex to be all that great. I'm very desensitized to the female anatomy.

So, I know its anecdotal, but those two infallible differences of our sex lives makes me think that porn is more detrimental than masturbation itself. I tried not fapping for 10 days before and that already made a big difference on how I viewed women, so I still think masturbation itself needs to be minimized. But maybe porn just really shuts off the the psychological part of your libido.

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