I’ve made it!!! A little bit of background on myself. I started PMOing at maybe 13 or so, and have been doing it regularly for the last four years or so. I had my 21st birthday last month, so that gives you an idea of how long I had been in this stuff.
Last year, I met a girl, who is now my girlfriend, and I started looking at myself and my life. In April I got baptized, and then went on an 83 day clean streak before resetting. After a couple of week-long streaks, I finally got really fed up, and came here. I started a journal, found accountability partners, and started fighting.
And it’s now 90 days later! I’ve finished my first challenge! I’m super glad about this, and really grateful to God for helping me make it this far.
TIPS AND TRICKS
1. Prayer
I’m away that not everyone is religious, but this has really helped me. I’ve been sitting on the bus, trying desperately not to look at some girl, just praying “God, help me” over and over again, and he does. He’ll always come through for you. There is no temptation that he hasn’t provided a way out of it.
2. Accountability
I can’t stress this one enough. When I tried to kick the habit before, I was trying to do it on my own, Lone Ranger style. It didn’t work.
This time, I found two AP’s on this forum, and I also told my father and my now-girlfriend. Knowing that they’re praying for me, and keeping tabs on me has helped incredibly!
3. Bounce Your Eyes.
I found this technique in a book called “Every Young Man’s Battle”, and basically it says that whenever you find yourself looking at something unhelpful, you physically look at something else. Nothing something close, where you can still watch out of the corner of your eye, but at something else entirely. I’ve found it super helpful, and after 90 days, it’s starting to become a habit.
Also, if you do this well enough, your SO will notice that you’re keeping your eyes to yourself.
4. Calm Erections Immediately
Just get rid of them ASAP, don’t let them stick around. Getting up and going for a quick walk can really help. Also, I learned that clenching your thighs for several seconds will usually help it go down.
And keeping it down keeps your mind away from what it wants!
BENEFITS!!!
1. Time
I would spend several hours a week on PMOing, and now I have that time for other things! Whether it’s writing, or socializing with friends, or gaming, or hanging out with my girlfriend, or reading a book, or even just sleeping! It’s really awesome to have the extra time.
2. Increased Confidence
I wouldn’t have called myself insecure before, but now that I’ve quit PMO, I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I have nothing to hide anymore! Well, maybe not, I’m still a pretty busted-up fellow, but I’m not hiding PMO.
I had never dated before, never even told a girl I liked her, but during this streak I’ve ended up in a relationship with a wonderful girl, and I wouldn’t have been able to get up the courage to ask her if I had still been PMOing.
3. Increased Focus
When I was PMOing, once I had it on my mind I wouldn’t be able to think about anything, or accomplish anything, until I had got myself off. Now, when I have an urge, I can battle it until it goes away, and then I can get back to whatever I was doing!
4. Trust
I have more trust and confidence in myself. I can do what’s right, no matter how hard, and I can win fights that are incredibly tough.
Also, my girlfriend trusts me much more now that she sees how hard I’m willing to work on something when I want to.
4. Other Stuff
I used to have minor incontinence. After I’d relieve myself, I’d leak a little. It wasn’t bad, and I never connected it to PMO, but it’s stopped now!
The images are slowly going away! At the beginning of my streak, I had a lot of flashbacks, and I used to fantasize a lot. I still have that occasionally, but very rarely now!
Dreaming! I used to dream a lot, then they stopped. I thought nothing of it, but I’ve been dreaming much more now, once I got about halfway through my streak.
Pride. I didn’t feel worth much whenever I PMOed. Now, I know that I have beaten the biggest problem that I’ve ever had, and there’s an incredible sense of pride and accomplishment from that. Huge self-esteem boost.
I’ve made it to Day 90, and I’m going to extend my goal to 100 days now. This is a battle that I’m winning, but I never want to let my guard down. Don’t want a coup, haha! I’ll still be active on the forums, and hopefully I can help some people with their battles.
Stay strong! You are never beaten until you quit! Good luck!
LINK – Pilgrim’s Progress – Day 90
by agentcarr20
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