I have been filled with hope having looked back at my journey over the last year and a half. I looked back from the point at which I started and while I am back to day 2/3 today having relapsed I am a long long way from who I was back then. I was a shadow of the true me, an image of lost potential.
Today I am proud of who I am and it is because of this and the journey this has set me on. I won’t claim it to be due to chemical changes in the brain, though that does have a certain amount to do with it I’m sure, but it has to do with what I have done in order to conqueror this addiction.
Building habits, making friends and finally living life! I have begun to live up to that potential as a person. I have a ways to go but in honesty I don’t fear relapse as I once used to. I know that I will get back on that horse stronger than I was before having made greater progress than before. I keep those habits, those friends and memories.
I cant wait to see where this will take me next. Thank you to all those who have messaged me and supported me thus far. This is an amazing community. And for those of you just starting, listen to these people as they know what they are talking about.
I’m 23 now. The main symptoms that caused me to stop were that I was acting like a zombie, I had no fight in me. I could not get angry. Also despite having a girlfriend at the time I felt lonely. No libido, yet for some reason still tried to have sex, and gave up as I could just not. The mood and energy was not there. Hard to put into words.
I am not using porn anymore, except when I relapse which is increasingly far and few between now.
As for benefits where to start, wow! Clarity of mind. This is hard to put into words but there is just a focus on whatever I put my mind to. I started a trend of great habit building. I have more time to do things that matter.
Energy! I just had to burn it off and I could push myself further than ever. Because of that my fitness went through the roof.
And socially I have improved the most. I have more friends than I shake a stick at, at least in comparison to my past self. And people seem engaged in what I have to say. I feel it has to do with feeling lighter and more passionate in everything I do. They pick up on the emotions and that attracts people to me.
[As for sexual dysfunction] I have tested with a partner and was very happy with the results. That was a month and a half ago and have not tested since.
LINK – Looking back and seeing how far I have come
By squashguru
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