17 years old 18/05/18, 22:44. After breaking up with my ex the second time, it triggered everything up to this point. I moved out of my dad’s because my relationship there was toxic, I felt like shit, and PMOing just simply made it worse. I deleted Snapchat and Instagram, and took up Reddit, because those sites just fuck with your mental health. It was a butterfly effect and eventually I ended up here, 90 days of success.
To begin. Superpowers. For the TL:DR yes it’s true. You do have more energy, confidence and everything else you might’ve read about. However, if calling feeling confident in yourself and motivated to do good things for yourself is a superpower, then that’s a simple indication that there’s something wrong in your life. Feeling happy with yourself isn’t a superpower, lifting cars and shooting lasers out of your eyes are.
NoFap and the community is the key that helps you unlock something you didn’t know you had. The will power to go to the gym and actually hang out with friends, without feeling that social anxiety of being judged all the time. To push yourself past a point you didn’t know you could, and do dumb shit like wake up at 5:30 in the morning to go for runs. Along with these superpowers you learn the boundaries you didn’t know you had, and that confidence and assertion you always wished you had.
But with every pro there’s a con. To the new people starting out it’s ok to have horrible shit feelings, know that they’re only temporary. And to those who know what I’m talking about, the relapsers and those who are well into their NoFap journey, I feel and understand you. That veil of anxiety you experience is just your body telling you it wants something, it craves something. It’s a beast you must learn to tame. An energy you didn’t know you had, your true self. Know that this shitty feeling may last up to weeks (flatline) just don’t give into it no matter what. Remember it’s just a feeling, you control your emotions, your emotions don’t control you.
How do you deal with that shitness? You ass fuck that feeling and fucking own it. Go to the gym and run twice as long, faster and harder because fuck that. Tell it to go suck a dick and go for a hike and go do shit. Fucking sit under the stars and be with your thoughts because fuck everything. You’re you. You’re a huge motherfucker and own it coz you ain’t it’s bitch, it’s your bitch. YOU ARE THE FUCKING GREATEST COZ THERE’S NO ONE ELSE LIKE YOU. Be independent. Be authentic. Be dominant. Be assertive. You are confident, and if you wanna cry because shit’s just getting to you, cry, because that’s better than giving into that inner demon you have. You control that demon, always hold your head up you beautiful bitch.
Remember that it’s all mindset. You learn new things about yourself and the world, because with discipline comes lessons. Your mind is stronger than anything. No matter how big your muscles are, if you’ve got a weak mind, then you aren’t really anything. You develop as a person, and that’s where these “superpowers” come into play. You simply just become you. The real you. You grow a mindset that you wouldn’t trade anything else for, and though you may still not be perfect, know that you can congratulate yourself for the things you have changed.
Don’t be fooled that your whole life is going to change in 90 days, because it won’t, but it does get better. Know that it’s a constant self improvement and it only goes uphill from here. I know I need to study harder and focus more, but I know I will get there sooner or later because I believe in myself. And you should too. No matter how many times you relapse, feel shit, whatever, always believe in yourself, move on and start over.
To end. I’m on the train writing this after seeing my friends, and for the first time in fucking forever I felt genuinely happy. I connected with them, laughed and talked (without that stupid fucking stutter). I just enjoy things more and do shit for myself. I have to say a huge fucking thank you to you guys and the community for helping me get through this. I thank reddit for shaping me into who I am (I know it sounds ironic af). Without this site I wouldn’t have learnt how to dress better, find my humour or find people I can relate to. So thank you all.
Good luck on your journey my dudes.
LINK – My 90 Day Experience
by Orthodox
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