More confident. Increased sense of empathy. Better social interaction and eye-contact. Sex is way better than before.

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Woohoo! Thank you guys! This forum has been extremely helpful for me. I don’t think I could have ever done it without you. First of all, this is not the first time I quit my porn addiction. I have done it before for about two years without NoFap, and it was a very fruitful period in my life.

But what can I say! People forget. And addiction builds up slowly but steadily. Humans are not very strong or sensible really. They need to constantly remind themselves of what they should or shouldn’t do. Otherwise, they may lose track.

I’m in my mid-thirties. Lately, consumption had increased dramatically and was ruining my life on all aspects. I got furious as I felt like I was a slave to it for life and realized that I hit rock bottom. I was depressed and felt miserable inside. I wanted to redeem my life and soul. So, I decided to first try NoFap and then see what else needs to be fixed or improved in my life, inspired by the philosophy that before planting a vegetable garden, one needs to eliminate the weeds. Porn was the first on the list that needs to go for sure.

Here are a list of drawbacks and benefits that I have seen so far:

Drawbacks:

  • In the 1st month, I got horrible flu-like symptoms.
  • Very strong urges, especially in the beginning, then every few days. The suffering is real. Sometimes I feel like there is someone inside my head screaming when I don’t give in, so I let it scream, while ignoring it. Great feeling of victory after it shuts up 🙂
  • Depression, low mood, sensitivity, sadness, especially in the beginning.
  • AGGRESSIVENESS. That one was huge for me. I would burst out for the tiniest reason.
  • Fatigue.

Benefits:

  • I’m more confident. I take better care of myself.
  • In general, people respect me more. Better social interaction and eye-contact.
  • Sex is way better than before. It just “clicks.” I think before NoFap, I would act as if I’m having sex, instead of being in the moment. I used to question my performance and didn’t pay much attention to my intuition. Now, I’m better in bed, and sex feels much better than before. I think other factors that may have contributed to that besides NoFap are breathing exercises, workout, Kegel exercises, prayer, and most importantly practicing mindfulness and being present in the moment
  • In addition, I think training my will-power with NoFap helped me to better control my ejaculation and to last longer.
  • More time to do the things I love and care about.
  • No guilt or worry that someone may find out about my addiction.
  • Increased sense of empathy towards other beings.
  • My feelings toward my child have changed, from resentment to love and care. I think porn addiction turns one into an endorphin seeking animal who resents any kind of responsibility. Cutting it helped me restore my humanity and parenthood.
  • The next day after I beat a big urge feels great! I feel powerful and free.
  • Better performance at work.
  • By day 80, I decided it’s time to let coffee go too. But that’s a different story. However, I recommend that you check the r/decaf sub-reddit if you’ve abused it like me and now are suffering from its addiction.

Final thoughts:

  • Resort to this forum a lot, especially in the beginning of your journey. You need to convince your addicted self of the reasons you’re doing NoFap and imprint them on your mind. So you’ll need an arsenal of tools including all kinds of arguments, motivation, and peer support you can get.
  • I like to think that it is not the brain that is addicted or sick, but the heart (or the soul or the self, whatever you name it). I think the brain is just a tool that one uses. If you’re a violent person, you can’t claim that your hand is addicted to hitting people! So, instead of obsessing about chemicals going inside your brain (the materialist approach), try to address you heart, higher self, and core values and contemplate on how to fix them in order to achieve long-term change.
  • One fears to be innocent in a cruel world such ours, so they try to toughen up and kill any feelings they have in order to avoid the suffering they have once experienced. But by killing one’s feelings, they kill their humanity and desire for life without realizing it at first. Then they fall into depression and wonder why it happened. There is power in goodness and innocence. A power that porn, as we recently know it, has exploited and ruined for good. But one hopes there is a way that they can claim their lost innocence while guarding it with their adult experience.

Good luck everyone, and thanks for reading.

LINK – 90 Days! Mission Accomplished!

by smou7a