Today is my last day on NoFap, after all we have to move on some time. I love this community, and I am going to miss you, but the wise know when it’s time to move on + Reddit takes up too much of my time.
I have been porn-free for close to 150 days, I’ve fapped 3 times since then, due to incredibly logical reasons and not due to temptation (long story) and I’m nowhere close to going back.
I want to address this to the all fapstronauts who are focusing on getting women.
A. NoFap + Focus on Women = Frustration & possible relapse.
1.) When you sit there and drool over every pretty woman, wishing you could be with them, you are still feeding a different process, which is rewarding your brain (albeit not as intense as porn), and it tells you that being a spectator, muttering to yourself “Mmm…dat ass is fantastic, I would tap that all day, everyday”, and not approaching her – is more rewarding than actually approaching her.
2.) You look for the validation of women to make eye contact with you; or give you a sign that they see you as attractive, Most women don’t do this anyways, so your confidence is going to plummet.
3.) You end up losing focusing, getting off-track and get angry when women come easily to other guys; making you feel that you aren’t worthy for one
4.) Then you Fap and/or watch porn, fantasizing over women who do ridiculous things in ridiculous situations that will never happen, which will make you more disinterested in real women.
5.) You’re back to square one.
B. So How Am I Suppose to Attract Women Without focusing on it?
- There is a surplus of guys with sex drive.
- There is a surplus of guys who can suppress that sex energy with porn.
- There is a surplus of guys who can express that sex energy with staring at women all day and fapping when they get home.
- There is an extreme shortage of men who can express that sexual energy in a positive manner.
C. So What Are You Telling Me To Do?
Read This: Think and Grow Rich – Napoleon Hill
D. The Benefits of Controlling Your Sexual Energy
1.) Apply it to exercising, if you make exercising a challenge everyday, then NoFap will never get old; because every single day you will feel like you’ve accomplished something.
2.) That same persistence that you had when you spent hours to find the PERFECT video to get off to in porn? Remember that? That persistence will be everywhere in your life. You’ll be productive for hours upon hours on end without even knowing it, contrast to those wasted days you watched pretty much the whole day and felt like shit because you don’t know where the time went.
3.) You will stop focusing on women, and because of this, for some strange reason women love the aloof guy; they’ll flock to you. It’s happened to me, but I don’t care. In fact, when a woman asks for my number, I get kind of annoyed now. Mostly because, I have the confidence to approach her, if I didn’t, then there’s a reason. (sorry to sound like a douche)
4.) Your personality will be magnetic, like that one guy that you know, that people just seem to gravitate to and want to be in his “circle”. That’s because he’s most likely mastered Sexual Transmutation usually without knowing it.
5.) When you do find that one beautiful woman that does catch your eye. Something will happen; it will be second nature, your feet will move and you will approach her. You will get her number, and you will be expecting her to say yes. I have never approached a woman with confidence before, in my life, until I focused my sexual energy on self improvement.
E. Legitimate Arguments Against This
- Men are hunters, we have to hunt for women – I understand this side, but if you look at it, men are also meant to attract women by showing off their status. etc.
- You can’t get girls unless you focus on them and be aggressive – This is a legitimate argument, the early bird gets the worm, and girls like men with confidence, etc; but there’s a certain way to do it, have you ever met those ghetto dudes (of every race, mind you) who holler at women from across the street? “AY MA! LEMME GET YO NUMBAH!” – Has never worked once.
And there’s probably more, they are legitimate, but just apply this to your life immediately. It won’t be immediate, NoFap and Sexual Transmutation is a snowball effect, but eventually you’ll see huge improvements in many aspects of your life.
Thank you guys, it’s been an honor, hopefully this subreddit gets more subscribers than r/gonewild one day :p, goodbye.
TL;DR – Stop focusing on sex.