First of all, want to say thank you and mad respect for the whole NoFap community and especially this subreddit r/Nofap , you guys, definitely gave me tips, great motivation, how to kill urges and deal with them, you guys rock!
Backstory:
Started fapping since I was around 9-11years old, even at the young age I was getting into some shitty kind of porn, I remember I have had nutted to super freaky hentai incestry porn when I was young and some other freaky shit, not going to get into it but please trust me, some freaky shit. So, I was drifting my sexual fantasies at pretty young ages not even knowing I was doing harm to my brain.
My NoFap journey:
Before NoFap Me – vary obese, bad habit (weed, video games, junk food), desperate, gamer 17yo virgin-kid who likes to go for that dopamine hit because IT FEELS GOOD DUUH, although I believed I weren’t very dumb after all, life-wise. But still, the facts about my life said something else about me.
Around 2016 I found NoFap idea. Started doing it without any tips and only with my intention to stop masturbating, because I knew and thought it is pretty common sense it would give some benefits in my life, not talking about healing my brain. At the start I failed miserably since I thought I could do it if I really wanted (like dropping nicotine addiction).At the start I dealt with PMO like it was a harmless puppy which I can beat, but in reality it is fire-breathing dragon who kept pot of gold behind it.
2017 – Started using Reddit. What a great app it is, forum of forums about everything pretty much. Joined whole bunch of subreddits also r/NoFap on my main reddit account. Casually visiting r/NoFap really stepped up my game in NoFap since I started looking at other people experiences, how others fight against PMO, how others fail, how others recover and success. But still I wasn’t fully into it since I had other life issues like smoking weed or compulsive eating which made myself more anxious and more drawn to that huge dopamine hit which would fix my anxiety temporary.
2018 – Started losing weight and slowly leaving weed behind me, stopped eating some of the foods which I usually binged and started intermittent fasting, this helped me to lose weight slowly over the years (or at least not gain it anymore), ALSO I started using NoFap techniques which I made myself. Actually, one particular technique – when I nut, I mark it on my calendar, If I nut twice a day, I mark it twice etc. This one was really bad since NoFap is about the mindset not about particular goal AND I think this technique would be better since if you fail, you start over. So, from this experience I would recommend everyone putting big thought into NoFap techniques what you rely on.
2019 February 7 – Had a regular nut relapse, can’t remember what I watched, I just know I did it at night from feb 6 to feb 7. Never ever I could’ve thought it was start of 365 days, so as you, you don’t know which nut will be or was the one where you will hit those 90 180 or 365 goals. Since it was late night nut, I didn’t feel post-nut depression, just went to the bed and continued my streak from 0.
2019 February 9 – Maybe was crucial point for my journey, I changed my mind that I don’t want to track all of my nuts in my calendar and just threw away my calendar, deciding to go on NoFap journey without counting the days I think was the crucial point. I started fighting against urges in the moment at the time when urges occurs and not for the goals, but for BENEFITS of it.
So, here’s what has changed in my life with NoFap (4 years since I joined NoFap):
- My brain works better (not only from NoFap, from meditation and sports too I guess)
- Started reading personal development books.
- Stopped playing video games
- Stopped smoking weed so frequently
- Stepped back from weed buddies
- Strengthened connection with people who I really care about
- Going to gym and staying on healthy diet is easier due NoFap
- Start meditating on HeadSpace app at third month of NoFap (Going to do 365days of Meditation too).
- Got confidence to start caring about my looks (hair, clothes, hygiene)
- Got a great glance what consistency should look like and learning to discipline myself more and more.
- Lost 28 pounds of weight throughout the whole year
- Got very confident in talking with women comparing myself before. After long periods of NoFap I believe that you numb your urge feeling and you can calmly and confidently talk with girls and show the real yourself, they love it. On the other side you sometimes get super horny if like you get in contact with girl and like she’s talking some kinky stuff or showing blatant signs that she wants you or I imagine if you having sex that would be mind-blowing, like the balance is still there.
- Got confidence to compete against other men, my self-esteem is definitely highest than ever been, since I know I accomplished and still accomplishing insane things (not only NoFap) that a lot of men couldn’t do consistently.
- There is a strange thing about NoFap aura, I believe there is one. Since it seems logical that from NoFap you get confidence and from confidence you get that confidence-aura which girls are just subconsciously attracted to and Astronauts call it NoFap aura. But I really believe the NoFap Aura exist, when you walk with your balls full with no issue at all, controlling the situation with your back straight, approaching other woman, talking and making eye contact confidently and knowing that you don’t care what others think, I think I have felt that other girls have recognized that aura which comes from me.
- I finally find it fun and amusing to approach girls with not much confidence problems, I am no longer so much scared like used to be. I even like to approach older ones if the situation is good, making jokes, asking something dumb etc. like at restaurants, stores cashiers etc.
My personal favorite tips:
- It should be your mindset, not the goals, goals will come quicker if you won’t chase them, you better chase a mindset that consistently fight against urges, also remember that everyone does and will get urges, it just become less frequent or weaker over time.
- At the start of this nofap journey I cutter all things related to dopamine rush which you get from looking girls, I even stopped looking at girls for some time because I felt it was making me urge (also its mindfulness practice).
- Meditation definitely helps, you learn your monkey mind to be more and more calm, and with mindfulness you can catch yourself when you feel urges and go kill it.
- One of the best methods for me to fight against/kill urges besides mindfulness is looking at this subreddit, how other relapse, get back on their feet, looking at other people tips, and obviously success stories.
- Don’t wait till Mondays or after next relapse to begin, your nofap journey has already started , as the saying goes, JUST DO IT (not to fap I mean, to fight urges, if u didn’t get that right).
- You better not talk about it, don’t promise anything to yourself just FOCUS on the URGES AND FIGHT IT period. It’s the ego what promises itself to do something or talks about it and lets you think you get confidence from talking about it, it’s YOU not the EGO who haves to fight against it. After only 9 months on no-nut November I started telling my friends that I do this thing called NoFap and introduced them to it.
Ending note
This NoFap thing is great, with your free will you consciously change the properties of your life, which change your subconscious which dictates your conscious and your conscious become more and more confident. Long lasting journey, I wish you all.
Remember, don’t count the days, make the days count ✌💪!
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tl;dr was desperate, became more and more confident and not going to stop
Here is my AMA if you want to ask me anything, I would answer questions here too but I’ll try to answer more specific if you ask there – https://www.reddit.com/r/NoFap/comments/ex7nef/ama_virgin_who_is_almost_at_365_days_of_nofap/
LINK – [20M Virgin] 365 days of NoFap achieved – Here’s what has changed in my life *LONG POST*
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