Today marks 300 days of no P and no M, and O only with my wife. It also marks over 60 days of no P-subs of any kind, including fantasizing thoughts. I think it is the last bit that has really pushed me over the top. My mind is the most free now that it has ever been in my adult life.
I follow the FREEdom process for establishing and maintaining mental discipline.
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1zqVL11JjWICOHCRUDmqXr9TNC_gpb6yhRF1hKp-fxcc/edit
I hope it may be a help to you, as well. I highly recommend reading the full book referenced at the link above and actually working through the material, in a group setting if at all possible. I was involved with 12-step style meetings for a few years, and that was incredibly helpful to me on my journey.
I commit to confessing each day that I am powerless to control my tendency to do the wrong thing, and that I am fully dependent on Christ’s help and strength in my life. I lay my life down to him each and every day, because I know now deep down in my bones — after many years of fighting against it — that his way is the only way that leads to true life. His care and control of my life has yielded far better results than mine ever did. And he has proven himself unfailingly good. I trust him. So, I entrust my self and my life to him. One day at a time.
I commit to continuing to check in with my AP network on a daily basis. These men have changed over time, but their continual presence in my life has been a huge encouragement to me, and they have helped me stay the course many, many times when I thought to veer off of it. Long-term recovery cannot happen in isolation. These men are the community of brothers to which I owe an enormous debt of gratitude. I do not take you gentlemen for granted, and I can never repay you for your service and love to me. We will all move forward into greater Christ-likeness, one day at a time.
I commit to keeping accountability software installed on all of my electronic Internet-connected devices for the remainder of my life. I do not trust myself in this area, and I never will. I feel today as if I will never go back to P, but I have felt this way before — and fallen. I will do everything in my power to safeguard my heart and my mind. This includes humbling myself to allow my trusted APs to monitor all of my online activity. A cord of many strands is not soon broken. I will be mindful every time I am online and will continue to commit to never seek out artificially sexually arousing material. One day at a time.
I’m just a regular fellow. There is nothing at all special or unique about me in any way. I am entirely average. I am also 100% committed to remain free from PMO from this day forward. As I was told long ago: Success in recovery is 100% guaranteed if you are 100% committed to the process. I have seen this to be true.
Onward and upward!
LINK – 300 Days
by Tao Jones
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