Summary of how I went from addicted to porn and anxious to pornfree and confident. My life story and how NoFap has helped change me and bring me a new sense of self worth.
To start off with I classify myself as your untypical nofapper in the sense that yes I shared the same PMO addiction but my life was decent. I’m a 21 yo M, ivy league student athlete, decent looking, ect. I say all that to say that I had my fair share of female interactions, hooked up with plenty. Won some and loss some the type of healthy interactions I should be having, interactions with the real thing, a living and breathing human.
Plagued by porn addiction
Even with all of that under my belt I was still plagued by this addiction to PMO. So much so that I made it so my life would revolve around it. Academic wise I was doing fair, ENOUGH to keep my athletic and academic eligibility. But that is so subpar to my worth is what NOFAP taught me through discipline. I had all the side effects but was so used to playing the role of the student athlete or jock that I still received some of those benefits (ie- hooking up with girls that I honestly felt really lucky to even kiss)
Notice how while I was able to have sexual relations I haven’t commented on my friendship with women. Because I couldn’t maintain any, it’s hard to do so when literally just a few hours or even minutes ago (jacking off before class) I just PMO to versions of this girl, in the deep dark recesses of my cave like atmosphere of a room. I struggled to even SPEAK. When everyone is constantly asking you to speak up or repeat yourself at one point you have to realize that the problem lies with you or else everyone else is simply crazy.
Addicted to porn and anxious
The simple act of raising my hand in class to speak on a matter that I felt passionate or wanted to speak on gave me such anxiety. PMO literally restricts your basic human rights, I give up my freedom of thought to anxiety. PMO groomed me to fit the role of the eye averting, soft spoken, and wrongly sexually charged man. It saddened me that I couldn’t even maintain a simple platonic relationship with another human being simply because they had a different anatomy than me.
Well long story short being this far in I do feel a greater sense of clarity, freedom, new found confidence and I’m starting to find myself. I’m starting to figure out what sort of person I really am. Recently I’ve made two new friends both girls, and that’s not even the best part. I was able to hold a nice and enjoyable conversation with both upon our initial interaction. I’ve been raising my hand in class with a PURPOSE, charging after it because I now NEED and WANT to be heard.
Life is better without porn
In conclusion, fuck porn. Shit is vile and twisted, does all types of weird shit to our brain that we don’t even fully understand. All I understand though is that ever since starting NOFAP my life has been getting better and I truly am feeling more like my youthful self. Should have heard my laughter the other day at the dumbest thing.
Take the step brothers, it’s always hard at first hell sometimes it’s still hard even after being away from it for a month now, but I know that my life is better without it. Thus, I must be doing something right 🙂 I believe in you all and make sure to have fun along the journey.
LINK – Fight IT! How I went from addicted to porn and anxious to pornfree and confident.
By – u/uaualegion
If you’re struggling with porn addiction or a porn-induced sexual dysfunction, support your journey to quitting porn. Browse thousands of recovery self-reports to learn what those who’ve recovered have experienced: Rebooting Accounts Page 1, Rebooting Accounts Page 2 and Rebooting Accounts page 3.
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