Is my premature ejaculation (PE) related to my porn use?

NOTE: If you have just finished a reboot and experience uncharacteristic premature ejaculation during initial intercourse events, don’t worry. It will pass. See One year – Sex feels amazing now, much better than it did in my previous relationships for a typical progression. Also watch this video “Should I masturbate before sex to last longer?” As one guy said:

“Focus on abstaining from porn, masturbation and fantasy. This will increase sensitivity, but it might frustrate you at the start because once you’re too sensitive, slightly arousing sexual acts might make you very aroused and ejaculate easily. No worries though, as you start to have sex, sensitivity will go down to normal levels.”

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Although rare when compared to ED or delayed ejaculation, premature ejaculation has been reported in heavy porn users. It’s best represented by this video. As a cause of premature ejaculation, porn use seems counter-intuitive. Two possible explanations come to mind:

1. Training your nervous system to ejaculate very quickly (or while partially erect)
2. Sensitized addiction pathways

Training your nervous system

Explained one user:

I’ve been reading a lot of material concerning the issue these last two weeks or so, and most of the info seems to indicate that now that I’ve gotten my subconsciousness under control, it’s my body’s turn. Or, rather, my nervous system. As in, I’ve trained my body to come as quick as possible so that I don’t get caught doing you know what, and now I need to re-train it. Said articles also recommend various meditation and breathing techniques, as well as squeezing the head of the penis as a means of last resort.

Another user:

I was going out with my now ex-girlfriend for 2 years before we broke up. During this period I never had any sexual problem (be it ED or PE). I am easily aroused and I used to last double the amount she lasted. During this period also, I wasn’t addicted to porn, and masturbated occasionally (PMO).

After we broke up, I took comfort in porn unfortunately. I PMOed regularly and even started going to massage parlours with happy endings. This went on for about 6 months, after which I got back with the same girl. When we got back together, I didn’t stop PMO or the massage parlours because I was hooked. (Just reduced the frequency.) The sex was awful with my girlfriend (or at least it was for her) I didn’t have a problem with getting it up (except maybe a couple of times), but I couldn’t last for over a minute. The relationship lasted for a year, during which, I am not proud to say I didn’t not even once make her orgasm from penetration, The same girl that I was giving multiple orgasms 6 month earlier.

And another:

ED + premature ejaculation? Anyone been in the same boat?

So, as the title states. I seem to suffer from both ED and premature ejaculation. When I would begin to get it on with a lady once I had an erection I would ejaculate very quickly (like 10-15 sec). I’m on the nofap wagon to hopefully eliminate the ED but I’m not so sure about the premature ejaculation. When I did masturbate it would be bedtime so I would try to finish as quickly as possible so I could go to sleep. I think this coupled with nervousness with a girl is what is ultimately responsible for the premature ejaculation. Has anyone been through this before? Any advice besides knowing that the nervousness will subside as I become more comfortable with a partner?

One man’s theory:

Well, here is my theory,

Masturbation/Porn can cause PE especially when you start doing it young. When you’re younger, you want to reach climax/orgasm quickly because of the fear of being caught. So you teach your mind that when you’re hard your job is to cum quickly and not enjoy the sensation. Over the years your mind adapts and teaches itself that the response to an erection is ejaculating quickly. I for one remember when I was younger it took me a while to cum and had to force an orgasm, but now I cum instantly within a few strokes of watching porn, having sex or masturbating.

Same principle applies to porn. When you watch porn you become overstimulated and ejaculation is one stroke away, but you stop when you are about to cum, relax and start all over again. Yes, the session can last for an hour or 2, but realistically, you cannot stroke for 10 minutes straight as you will cum instantly. Unlike porn, when you have sex, you cannot just pause, take time out or relax, as it wouldn’t be fun for the lady. Hence, why you blow within a few strokes or before even entering.

So basically, we have rewire our brains to enjoy the sensation of sex and the erection. So during the reboot, we’ll get hard numerous times and not fap. Our mind will not know what do to and unwire the response to an erection being an automatic ejaculation. This will take a long time, years of abuse will not recover within a mere weeks,

Spoken to numerous older men than me and have asked about how they last long. Many said that they last long naturally and don’t watch porn or masturbate. My cousin who says he lasts 20-30 minutes has said he lasts longer when he doesn’t watch porn or masturbate.

And yet another man’s theory:

Sensitized addiction pathways

We associate porn-induced ED and delayed ejaculation with desensitization or what we call a “numbed pleasure response.” Desensitization involves a decline in dopamine signalling in the reward circuitry.

In addition to desensitization, every porn addict develops sensitization, which is formation of Pavlovian memory circuits for porn use. (See  Why Do I Find Porn More Exciting Than A Partner?) This manifests as cues (seeing an image, stress, being alone) triggering strong activation of the reward circuit, and the urge to use porn. The more sensitized your brain is to something, the more automatic the particular behavior becomes, and the more triggers will arouse a strong sense of anticipation of pleasure (regardless of the reality). Perhaps men with premature ejaculation have formed very powerful (sensitized) pathways that lead to high state of arousal and a quick ejaculation. Perhaps it’s partly related to a history of forcing orgasms with half-hard penises. I can only speculate.

Here are what some guys have said:

I think it’s important to keep your package healthy while not using it. Therefore, I have set up a good kegel routine which will help me build stronger muscles around the penis, allowing me to have dry or mutiple orgasms. If you suffer from PE, this will also help you. But then it’s not about kegels, but reverse kegels. It’s a sort of stretching exercise which will help you relax the pelvic floor and make it less tense. This will help since PE often is a result of a tense pelvic floor. You should set up a routine that fits you, and if you suffer from PE, don’t use too much kegels. Instead focus on the reverse kegels. You can read about all this and how you do it here or here.

Age 25 – I was a sufferer of severe PIED & Premature Ejaculation

Sex is absolutely amazing (much better then how it was before, when I was masturbating / looking at porn  I had mild premature ejaculation, that has now gone, and I can control when I ejaculate (that’s probably worth mentioning).

The connection that I have with my girl is out of this world, real, vulnerable intimacy (when you let your guard down with a girl, and you get back what you give, man I can’t explain the feeling, it’s euphoric), and I seriously owe it to nofap, there’s just no other explanation. LINK

Age 31 – Married: Both PIED and premature ejaculation are gone. Had some of the best sex we’d had in a long time.

This long story may hold some keys as to why;

My comments on my ED and PE. Sorry for length.

I can be categorized as a man with acquired Premature Ejaculation (PE) as well as some form of Erectile Dysfunction (ED). I would like to make a comment on the usual stories that come up when people attempt to describe their Premature Ejaculation that they associate with their excessive and increasingly disturbing porn use, as well as share a bit of my story.

The story that I usually hear on blogs and even on this site, is that guys want to get rid of the PE that they learned from watching porn and jerking off too quickly (i.e. they didn’t want to get caught, or other various reasons to doing the deed quickly).

I wonder if that was really the exact case. For me I experienced ED before I experienced PE. I started watching porn in what I would call a very usual way at around 15 or so. And as the story goes with porn addicts I began jumping up the porn latter to increasingly arousing things. It began with the simple search for boobs on the google images, then videos, then sex, then varying sex, then scenarios, tehn groups, then fetishes which zoom in on one aspect or act of sex.

At first I had no problems, masturbation was fine, and I found it extremely exciting and fulfilling to masturbate. For me my perversion growth was exponential so where I didn’t really explore much at first, by the time I was 18 and had a girlfriend my senior year of Highschool, I was into bukakke, and pissing, and face-fucking, and other very extreme acts of sex.

At first the sex with my then GF was great, and satisfying for the both of us (she verified too at the time). Although I had a girlfriend, I was also non-stop masturbating–easily 4 times a day if I didnt see her, and of course with the most perverse things I could find. Then at some point I could not cum sometimes when we were having sex, to which I would come up with excuses such as I needed to stop because my leg hurt from the football game I played or other bullshit. But this is all explainable for those who are familiar with the repercussions of porn addiction. It escalated one step further when I could no longer even keep a boner.

And the same thing began to happen with jerking off too…I simply was having trouble getting it up, AND THIS IS WHERE THE CONNECTION OF ED AND PE COMES IN FOR ME. While I was having a greatly difficult time getting fully aroused and erect I was completely compelled to keep masturbating and get the rush of happy feelings from cumming. Regardless of the fact that my dick was not entirely hard (the way it used to get) I would hack away at it desperately trying to cum. I would do this in the morning before school, and several times after, all the while forcing myself to ejaculate. I wasn’t even horny, the best word I would come up with is merely compelled by some urge to keep forcing myself to cum. Again that urge makes sense in the context of porn and general sex addiction.

But with this now completely forcing of orgasms (with attention brought to not even being really horny nor being erect in the way I used to be) I began to teach myself to cum with very little stimulus, and the PE began to set in. I view this as being different then the traditionally told story of simply trying to cum “quickly”. I recall in my normal days having a joking conversation about jerking off with friends, and we all confirmed (laughingly) that if we really wanted to, we could easily cum in 30 secs. But that never effected anything at the time.

With the onset of ED came the need for me to focus and force the muscles and mental mechanisms to get myself to cum (not necessarily quickly, but mechanistically). And it became just that, a mechanism. I’m 22 now, that GF is long gone for other reasons than sex, and I just graduated from college. My attempt to get aroused has drawn me into further disgusting porn, reaching the sad cold floor of rock bottom with beastiality and Incest (two forms of porn that has entirely taken the humanity out of sexual experiences). Now had I known of the existence of porn addiction I would have obviously stopped, but I didn’t know so I continued for all four years of college, having onsets of depression and other negative views of life.

FOR THOSE BRAVE SOULS WHO HAVE GIVEN ME YOUR ATTENTION THIS FAR I APPLAUD YOU AND I SHALL CONCLUDE.

As I now see my acts retrospectively paired with this new understanding of porn addiction I stand by this notion of mechanistic cumming, this act of masturbation and idea towards orgasm that has taken away all sorts of sensuality from the act of orgasm, turning it into a short spurt and muscle memory twitch of a climax. For those of you with acquired PE I ask you to look at your new behaviors and your new feelings and sensations that came with your onset of PE. Before all this nonsense came about orgasms were absolutely phenomenal (my fucking knees would literally shake) but now I cum with a mechanical twitch with no sort of real gratitude toward the act (and that is including with women).

If feels different and lame. I’m curious of you guys out there who have this same problem if your orgasms have not only become short but unsubstantial compared to the satisfaction you once got from the act. Has it become mechanistic? (does that word make sense for how you feel sexual arousal has become for you?) I have started my journey of trying to get back to the Old Me. I just wanted to therapeutically reveal my situation, as well as try to draw attention to how I feel my onset of PE actually arouse from my original ED. How to turn it around? I’m not sure, but anyone with this problem please feel free to get back to me one your feelings.

Another theory:

I’ve suffered from PIED and PE for a most of my adult life (I’m 38 now). There are times when PE and ED don’t seem as bad but it’s always there to some extent.

Anyway, PE. Here’s my theory.

When I started PMO at age 12, with stolen pages from my brother’s dirty mags, it took ages to orgasm – it was practically inconvenient. Over the years, I believe I have trained my body to get to the point of orgasm quickly and efficiently, mostly out of the conscious desire to not have to dedicate an hour to knocking one out. It started-off as a need to not get caught (the longer you are doing it, the greater the chances of discovery), but as time progressed and I moved out of my parents’ house, it became about being able to sneak a fap in to a time-limited window – in the toilets at work, before the wife gets home, etc.

Once trained to be quick, it then became about delaying the inevitable. When there was the luxury of time, if became about edging and keeping myself near the brink to prolong the enjoyment. But this doesn’t solve the PE issue, it just makes it worse because the less effort you have to put into keeping yourself on the edge, the better.

Sex with my wife became more about frustration for me (although I would always  ensure that she was seen-to after I PE’ed). Sometimes I wouldn’t last  until full penetration. Other times, a few minutes at best. Sad.

I’ve decided to have sex with my wife when she wants during my nofap. I know this can set you back on the road to recovery but I don’t think it fair on her to do otherwise. I’m also hoping that I’m still partially wired for her as well as porn because I could still be aroused by her; erections just rarely last long and are often weak. Maybe I am a fool for trying for reboot and rewiring all in one, but it’s my fall to take and we learn from our mistakes.

Anyway, I am digressing again.

My therory is this: You need to solve the ED before working on the PE (if you have both), and my reasons are as follows…

Traditional and effective treatments for PE involve relaxation before reaching the brink, mental distraction, etc. You can’t do this if you lose the erection every time you pause for breath. You need strong, lasting erections before messing about with this stuff.

Also, I found that, when suffering from both PE and ED, losing the erection and then carrying-on is a recipe for even worse PE. It’s like your genitals give-up and just get it over with – I find that I can ejaculate with almost no sensation of actually having orgasmed, if I’ve lost the erection and tried to force it back into action – it also happens bloody quickly.

However, once you have a sustainable erection, you can stop for breathers, regain control and then carry on. I have found that each time I regain control, I can go for a little more time before taking another breather. After half a dozen times, you can go for longer that you’ve dreamed and start feeling like a rock-star (which builds confidence and helps in its own way). Of couse, I might be able to say this with more conviction when I have rebooted for longer and actually have regular decent erections to experiment with. This is basically the stop-start method without the masturbation.

I firmly believe PE (related to PIED, at least) is about having trained the body for speed and that with some practice, you can train it back.

The one time we have made love since starting nofap, I took it really slow from the start. Mostly just enjoying the sensation of being joined and together – no thrusting initially, just kissing and stroking. The key seems to be avoiding getting worked-up – the temptation is to tense-up and worry about the PE but this is a) a recipe for performace anxiety, and b) the more you fight it, the quicker it will happen. This last point sounds stupid but the sexual stimulation and orgasm involve a lot of tension and releasing of tension – if you are tense and on alert for signs of PE, then you are already putting yourself in a tense state – relax and enjoy. Don’t stoke the dopamine fires with thusting and approaching orgasm but rather relax and get the oxytocin flowing – it helps.

I have been unconsciously unaware of my 13-year porn addiction until last weekend it clicked….Through the years I was an absolute sex maniac. I could have sex every night with no hiccups….The last 8 years have been the worst; I was depressed, anxious, and angry, confused and didn’t know what was going on with me….In the last year I have noticed my erections have been really weak and I have premature ejaculation.

NoFap cured my erectile dysfunction (ED), delayed ejaculation (DE) and premature ejaculation (PE)

[Advice to a newly rebooted guy complaining of PE] I been there and understand. You’re rewriting your brain but in the meantime, you’ve psychologically taught yourself that sex is for self pleasure and the end goal is ejaculation, while now you’re teaching yourself that sex is to pleasure another person and the end goal is intimacy. It will take some time but I’ve been there.

I’ve found a very useful tool (and this is going to suck but it helped me out) is to use the numbing, or delayed ejaculation  condoms offered by Trojan or some other company. I think using those for a bit is definitely going to delay ejaculation and as you do that, plus no fap, it helps to reset your brain that ejaculation takes longer than the few seconds you could achieve with your hand.

I feel I’ve solved the premature ejaculation issues that have been bothering me. What I now understand is we have phases of arousal. The problem was with my understanding. Pre-E isn’t about reaching FULL arousal and holding back from the edge of the final phase, but staying in the phase beforehand and avoiding the finale until I’m ready.

When I was masturbating 2-3 times everyday there came a time eventually I noticed that I wasn’t getting a full erection, that I was only lasting 2-3 minutes before orgasm, that I had to vigorously stimulate myself physically, etc. I also was not able to get an erection standing up, only when seated or laying on my back. Now by only masturbating once every 1 to 2 weeks (but still striving to make it the entire 8-10 weeks of a full reboot) I’ve noticed I get almost 100% erection quality when I do masturbate, that I can go 10 to 15 minutes at a time, that I could lightly stimulate my penis and it would respond, and most importantly, I could get an erection while standing up as well.

Quitting masturbating was the best thing I ever did for my sex life. I still have a lot to learn but I’ve noticed some very positive things in regards to premature ejaculation.

I started nofap like probably a lot of you to see if it would fix my ED. I knew it was just a mental thing I needed to get over. Every time I found myself in a situation with a girl I would get so nervous and all I would think about would be getting it up, and of course I couldn’t because I was so nervous. Once I started no fap I tried to only get one night stands, no strings attached type of deals because I didn’t want to embarrass myself with someone who I actually cared about. (I feel like this is a pretty common occurrence here) I had 3 one night stands over the period of a couple months of not fapping, I managed to get it up but came almost immediately. It was super awkward and I felt worse than ever.

After doing some reading on here I decided to ditch the hook-up strategy. After a while I found someone I really connected with. Our first time having sex I finished really fast again, because I was nervous about finishing too soon like always, but we just waited a bit and tried again, 100x better. We’ve been hooking up steadily for a few months and the sex is fantastic. Guys who are worried about ED or PE, your first time with someone is probably going to be shit, even after not fapping, but if you find someone who really wants to be with you it won’t matter. It takes practice, just like anything. The effects of nofap took a bit to kick in for me. Original post

Age 22 – Happier, less depressed & anxious, more focused, brighter outlook, PE gone

I have definitely experienced that same effect many times: feeling like I might orgasm even though I wasn’t hard at all. I think porn helped our fantasies become so intense that they are now unnaturally pleasant. Just a theory. Anyway, I “tested” plenty with fantasy and erotic fiction after I gave up video porn, and didn’t experience any improvement until I totally abstained from all porn and masturbation. In my experience, after a few weeks those intense flushes of horniness began to cause erections. Inconsistent at first, but improving over time. As the intensity of those experiences settle down a little, something else will come up a lot.

More than half a year ago, I came to the conclusion by myself, that I had copulatory impotence. Had the opportunity to have sex with multiple girls, and each time I could not get hard enough for penetration. It frustrated me. I didn’t know what the cause was, except I knew that I could get hard easy while masturbating to porn. Partner would jack me off furiously, but I would only get blue balls. Really good-looking girl with hot body would not make me hard. Something was really not right.

But when I put on some internet porn, I got very hard, and came after probably less than a minute. Ridiculous. After a month without porn, followed by two orgasms during sex and a return to masturbation…I had sex again a week later. Another hot girl that at the verge of going for sex, did some manual stimulation, and I almost came prematurely after 15 seconds. I stopped her, as I wasn’t even half hard. I couldn’t get it up, but almost ejaculated anyway. So freaking weird.

[Part way through reboot] A lot of us here have the situation where we start to come when our penis is only partly erect. It seems connected to porn addiction. In my case, my penis sometimes only gets totally erect just as I’m coming.

[5 days no PMO] I got triggered by pictures of one of my favorite stars. I tried to fantasize about real women instead. I was so turned on that I felt I was orgasmic. But the funny thing was that I did not have any change in my penis. I actually felt as though I might orgasm, but my penis wasn’t hard at all.

LINK – I’m in the same boat. I can say that my ED is improving. Both ED and PE seem to improve the more times I successfully have sex w/ my new gf. By successfully I mean maintaining an erection the entire time and lasting long enough to get her off first. I’m still not confident that will happen every time, but when it does it seems to help quite a bit the next time.

A few success stories:

Not E.D., Not D.E., but P.E. (Premature Ejaculation!)

So many men here at YBR and YBOP have “porn induced” Erectile Dysfunction (ED) and Delayed Ejaculation (DE). But some of us (I believe a minority) have premature ejaculation (PE) from our porn use.

In the broadest sense of the definition, I guess PE is a sub-set of ED.  PE is a form of dysfunction.  However, PE it is very much the opposite condition of ED and DE.  In my case. I get hard very, very quick.  My erect penis is very sensitive (hyper-sensitive) making ejaculation embarrassingly easy (quick).  Prior to my re-boot, my penis would get so rock hard and stand at attention at 12 o’clock.  the skin on my penis stretched tight like a snare drum.   My penis was a fueled up rocket sitting on the launch pad, count down starts at 10 seconds, 9, 8, 7, 6,5,4,3,2,……..1, ORGASM. the words “sorry honey” became my motto.

but today, 52 days into re-boot, my penis is no longer on the rocket launch pad.  It stands at 10 O’clock. I have a softer, but bigger erection.  Don’t get me wrong, It is still very hard and capable or V penetration.  It is more plastic now and less rigid.  it is less sensitive  , but not ready to explode.  but most important to my relationship with my wife, I am able to last longer now.  the re-boot is working very well on my porn induced PE!

I guess my question is “why do some guys get PE from porn usage, and some guys get DE?

I was always a horizontal fist humper or sitting prone mastubator. I could never do it standing in shower or laying on my back. I also edged a lot, sometimes for many hours on end.  Could these be clues as to why I developed PE and not ED or DE?

I am no longer experiencing the extreme PE that I have experienced for many years prior to re-boot. It is really a miracle, because i had always just assumed it was some genetic defect. I did not connect the dots as it possibly being porn-induced until I found YBOP.

Just thought I’d update you as I have been perhaps one of the longest cases on this site, which was troubling for me as I recovered, and hopefully can serve as some inspiration for those frustrated with lack of results.

First off: getting a consistent partner was what did it for me. Before that frustration was all I saw. Starting at month 7 after reboot I had someone to flirt with, sleep with, cuddle with, and kiss gently before moving to sex. This slowly got me going again. At first I could only get hard for short periods of a time and had to “rush” for penetration, but after each time my erections got stronger.

Also high levels of PE have subsided as time has worn on–practice makes perfect. I now get hard just by gently kissing my lover and have zero issues with erection quality. I have zero desire to masturbate and am sure libido will continue to improve, as well as my orgasms which were nothing of note at at start (but have slowly gotten better). I had sex three times in one night with zero difficulty so I cannot believe how far I have come since embarking on this journey.

Get a real partner, take the time to get to connect with someone (not just sexually), and it is an experience too powerful to describe. With everything taking so long for me, I can only imagine the changes a year from now. 9 months later and I am a changed man. I felt obliged to share this final update for all those struggling out there and hope no one ever has to go through what I did.

Fellas fellas fellas!!!! Stick with this plan!!!…I personally felt like no one wanted to be cured more than me. I followed the plan and got my first opportunity to see if it worked. I honestly believe I had the worst case of PE in the world…10 to 40 secs. My erections have improved to about 85%.

I am living proof that this stuff works but u have to be strong and restrain from all pmo activities. I had one relapse in 90 days but I got my chance see if it worked with a new girl. stamina was back like never before. I couldn’t believe it!!! Had to give my feed back, hope it inspires someone…be strong and you will be rewarded.  (LINK – Edrummond May 18, 2012 )   

[Age 53, 101 days without porn or masturbation, but occasional sex with wife] At the beginning I had ED problems, I’m convinced because of internet porn addiction. Now, even though my erections are not “rock solid” – they are a lot firmer and I am no longer experiencing premature ejaculation. I think my PE problems were a combination of being porn-induced and anxiety. When I was having my ED problems, I was always anxious and worried about getting and maintaining an erection. When I did get one, it didn’t last long – either through “rapid fire” stimulation or for psychological reasons, “Please stay hard, please stay hard …etc.”

And then bam, nothing! I really think slow, carefree lovemaking has really helped me here. I last way longer than the old way we used to do it.

Something I have noticed during my reboot is that for me there are two kinds of sex, one with full presence and kind of a slow (oxytocin driven sex?) and the other horny, more fast and agressive type of a sex (dopamine driven sex?). PE problem only occurs with the dopamine driven fast one. If I’m open and present in the moment, there is neither PE or ED. If I’m in a rush and horny, there’s no ED but there’s PE. Also erection has been much firmer with the slow and precent sex.

I also think PE can be anxiety-related, possibly because anxiety is one of the feelings usually supressed by PMO. Might sex during anxiety light up some old pathways in the brain, which easily then lead to an orgasm? PE is not healed by masturbation or orgasms. They are a short-term “solution” for a long-term problem.

Are you masturbating the same way you used to do when you we’re watching porn? You can get so used to the pressure and speed of your hand that anything different just makes you either cum or lose your erection. Try slower, more sensual masturbation to sensation alone, with no fantasy.

Some of us are initially faced with an awful choice: Erectile Dysfunction or Premature Ejaculation. In fact, I both had both at the same time. That was my low point during recovery. It wouldn’t get hard just making out; so she touched it (soft) and it exploded (soft). This, for me anyway, was a temporary condition. Once I was able to get hard regularly (and I thankfully have a willing partner) and was able to have sex on a frequent enough basis, I now get hard quickly and easily AND stay hard long enough for her to be completely satisfied.

[3 weeks with no PMO] Last night I had sex with a girl I know. My God, it was fantastic. I had a huge erection, a very firm one indeed. I didn’t Premature Ejaculate (PE) at all, which was always my worry. I’ve had PE for years. I put it down to anxiety of some sort, but recently I have been thinking has it been induced with overstimulation to porn.

I might have PE due to porn and masturbation addiction, so I decided to quit. Another symptom that I had was semen leakage whenever I am excited, be it watching porn or foreplay before sex. I did a little research about semen leakage and I found out that “Semen leakage is a sign of the weakening of the parasympathetic sexual nerve that keeps the ejaculation valve shut and hold the erection. Eventually maintaining of erection can be a problem. ” And this might lead to “ejaculat(ion) upon penetration or in a short time after few strokes”.

Exactly the problem I had, and it takes me a very long time regain an erection after ejaculation. It has been 3 weeks now with no PMO. It hasn’t been easy, especially when I am alone surfing the net, it takes a lot of self control stay away from porn. A couple of days ago, by chance ( seriously 😀 ), I got to a page on reddit where women post nude pictures of themselves. I got very aroused, and got the strongest erection since I started my detox. I am happy to say that I did not have any semen leakage, not a single drop, whereas three weeks ago, I would have had substantial leakage.

Age 31 – (ED, PE) Incredible progress. On the road to full recovery.

My wife was the first partner I opened up to. After gentle breathing and taking the pressure off, I had anxiety free wonderful sex for the first time in my life. I took the pressure off myself and was able to absorb myself in the moment and focus on the pleasure rather than my performance.

I wouldn’t say I was completely over PE during this time, but it became less of an issue. Then for some reason, slowly my PE started to return. I noticed that I was starting to feel out of control on a few occasions and more importantly, to start to feel anxious about it again. I don’t know 100% for sure, but I believe this period was related to an increase in porn viewing. There was a period when I was sexually frustrated from not having enough sex when I was in that ‘zone’, yet instead of engaging in other forms of bonding with my wife, I went for the instant gratification of daily masturbation to meet my own needs (or so I thought).

There were periods when I focused on my wife and found satisfaction bonding without sex, but I think due to my daily masturbation and porn viewing, I found it hard to settle on this. For the last month I haven’t masturbated to orgasm for probably the longest period of my life. I have played recently and found myself to be incredibly responsive and hard, yet stopped before orgasm. I have found the abstention incredibly beneficial, but feel I have a difficult choice.

Solving PE – Think I’ve Whipped It Whether you’ve acquired PE or ED from fapping, don’t wait till you’re 29 to address your problem like I did.

I’ve basically had to unlearn the quick orgasm response that I’ve taught myself over a decade and a half of rubbing one out in the bathroom. No fap was the first step.

My other tools have been coitus reservatus, kegels, and paying attention to my muscle tension/breathing.I think monitoring muscle tension/breathing was what really led to my break through over the last week. I’ve found that orgasms are triggered by muscle tension. I’ve been able to last progressively longer by keeping relaxed and not holding my breath.

The kegels have may have helped a bit…I’m not really sure. I’ve been completely unsuccessful at “kegel-ing out” an orgasm. And though I’ve been able to continue on after an orgasms or two thanks to kegeling, it hasn’t really increased my endurance.

Today I lasted a solid half hour from insertion, and I feel like I’m finally beating this embarrassing problem. That wasn’t a half hour of straight up pussy-pounding: there was a lot of full-insertion and grinding, kegeling inside her, etc. But it’s a quantum leap in terms of what I’ve been able to deliver in the past.In the past I’ve tried practicing longer fapping sessions. I’m not sure why, but there is no crossover; it didn’t help me last longer in bed at all.

Good luck to anyone else out there going through the same problem!

I had sex around Day 130 and it was super fast as might be expected. However, I had sex again multiple times 3-4 days ago and, to my surprise, I didn’t have to fight that hard to keep from ejaculating too fast. It was almost like I could go as long as I would have pre-reboot (where I suffered from delayed ejaculation) – just with the added ability to ejaculate with less effort (i.e.- no intense focusing on porn or some other situation), and much improved erection strength and recovery time.

It wasn’t until the third session that I even really felt super sexual and engaged on a more emotional level. I really think the basic reboot just brings the brain back to neutral, and then you have to do some things to get yourself to where you want to be. Since the sex, I’ve had more spontaneous erections, had morning wood (which I still hadn’t been getting before), and have noticed that my penis seems bigger flaccid, like it’s waking up or something.

303 days in by Tastybusy303 days

I am another long rebooter who has had some success but still has room for improvement in the PE department. I have been trying something new for a week now and I believe it is helping.

I did a bit of research and read some interesting things about GABA. GABA helps to regulate neurotransmitters and there actions. It occured to me that just becuase I may be recharged by no PMO and no alcohol I may still be out of balance, which explained why a came so quickly when I had sex with my wife. I now take 1000mg of GABA morn, noon and before bed.

Almost right away I felt a reduction in my anxiety levels and then hightened sence of sensation in my body. Last night I had amazing sex with my wife (and again this morning). I had rock hard wood and lasted longer than I needed to to get the job done for her.

There is a lot of conflicting research and opinions on GABA. Some say it can’t cross the blood brain barrier and is therefore useless and others say it finds its way in via the pituitary gland. I just know what I feel when I take it and know it’s working. The positve studies showed that 3000-5000mg was where benefits began to be realized, so thats why I take 3000 a day. Be aware that taking 1000mg of GABA may give you a temporary tingling and or heat sensation in your face, arms and hands about 20 minutes after you take it. It’s a bit disconcerting at first but it only lasts a few minutes. I also take a bunch of other supplements but GABA is for me at least making a dramatic difference with “our” problem.

NoFap fixed my premature ejaculation problem, anyone noticing the same? From 10 seconds to 3-5 minutes.

Pre no-fap days, I could only last 10 seconds during sex with my girlfriend, it made me super sad.

Abstaining from porn and masturbation makes me last much longer, anyone noticing the same thing?

This was just interesting:

As a long time PE’er, I was rather anxious to have sex last night. I’ve been on a streak of 33 days, and doing good.

I’ve been interested in sex, ejaculation and semen-retention for quite a while now. I’ve had some devastating brainfogs after faps of course, but also after sex with a real person, and I was always a bit scared that it would never change.

Well, last night I finally managed to have a dry orgasm WITH a partner, not only by using hands and breath by myself. It was really special. I dit not feel ANY draining of energy after, a bit of blueballs, but that’s it. Today, even though we just slept two hours, I feel really good and could easily done it again a number of times.

Also – about PE. I just told my girl that I’ve been trying to master the dry-orgasm technique, and that I may have to stop sometimes. After 10 min, PE totally got managable, and I could go for easy 30 min +. When the orgasm came, it felt exactly like the real thing, exept for the condom being dry afterwards.

I’m really proud of myself, and want to use my story to give others with PE and severe energyloss after ejaculation and real sex a new hope. Please excuse any grammar mistakes, as my main language is Icelandic 🙂 About the premature ejaculation-effect of NoFap.

Interestingly, the ancient Chinese Daoists also recorded that premature ejaculation was one of the symptoms of “expenditure without restraint.”

It was observed that ejaculation, although depleting physical reserves, has the opposite effect on sexual desire. After an immediate post-coital letdown, there is a rapid psychological rebound and an intensification of erotic interest. This sexual law of inertia, the tendency of a body in motion to remain in motion, or sexual addiction, is best expressed in the traditional medical metaphor of fire unchecked by water (yin hsu huo wang) and [the solution] the Taoist aphorism, “when the ching is full [i.e., when one is not deplete] one is free of lustful thoughts.”

It was noted that premature ejaculation (tsao-hsieh), spermatorreah (hua-ching, or post-orgasmic illness syndrome), and nocturnal emissions (meng) were associated not with a high level of sexual energy, but with deficiency, often resulting from what the Classic of Su Nu calls, “expenditure without restraint.” Thus sexual prowess came to be defined not as the ability to expend semen but to save it. Excerpt is from Douglas Wile’s book: Art of the Bedchamber, pp. 6-7

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