I want to start off by saying hello to everyone in here and to just say THANK YOU to NoFap for this powerful platform to really help people. I know people are struggling and it legit hurts me because I’ve been through it all with my addiction and really know all the drowning emotions that comes with it.
With that said I’m here to tell anyone reading this that feels suffering/pain/guilt/disgust/loss/weakness/problems to absolutely know there is another side of you, that you WILL reach when you are no longer OUT OF CONTROL………YOU’LL FEEL AT PEACE AND IN CONTROL. Okay here’s my story…..
I started watching porn/masturbate when I was around 12 but I didn’t know I was addicted for years until there was a list of things that I ended up taking notice of. One of my earliest memories of noticing the problem was the random urges to want to watch porn and masturbate because I wanted to “feel” normal because I was stressed out.
[I thought it was normal]
From there I had the ignorance of thinking it was totally normal (especially how society/media makes porn seem good for the body)……..let me tell you right now, i was on a damn hamster wheel. I would feel stressed and wanted to feel “normal” and “relaxed” but funny thing is, I’d watch the porn and masturbate to then feel absolutely terrible and the cycle would just be reoccurring. It had full control of me.
The wild thing was I knew that it would make me feel horrible so I would try NOFAP to feel better……..wasn’t able to go even 1 day! When I tell you I think I tried NOFAP around 1000 times I’m not even joking you. It got to a point where I did the porn blockers/would have alarms on my phone/would lie to partners and family/would even set stuff up to make sure I wouldn’t even have the chance to masturbate or watch porn……..somehow I always found a way!
PIED
I have dealt with PIED and that I believe was the pure gasoline to my Porn Addiction. It spiraled me and created a part of me that just felt so down and so unmanly and that to me, that was the worst feeling I’ve ever had. There was so many times I would question myself “am I ever going to be able to stop?” “Am I going to be married and be still addicted to porn” and to me that felt so defeating.
From having PIED with many partners that led to me feeling a certain way about myself and having to never be present and never going after what I really wanted to do and the feeling of the grip of porn addiction had on me for PAINFUL YEARS….
Complete freedom and control
I’m here to tell you I have found myself that put me in complete freedom and complete control.
It’s been about a whole year without watching Porn or Even masturbating. Before that, my best NOFAP streak was 27 days
I have gotten my confidence back, I’m in an amazing relationship, I feel connected, I’m present, I’m Calm, I can’t even believe to say that I have no urges at all to even want to watch porn and masturbate which to me is wild because there were times where I didn’t want to at all and would tell myself “don’t do it! and I would almost wake up form a daze knowing I just did it and would get so down on myself. There were times I would be doing and it and during I would tell myself I can stop right now but the voice in my head would say “it’s fine, just do it today and then you’ll start tomorrow”…….the scary part of it was I did the same thing yesterday!
I’m completely free from Porn and Masturbation and it seriously feel like you have your life back. I want to help as many people as possible so I’m Looking to start some media where people can find motivation in it that really helped me understand everything. I know how much some videos helped me by someone talking about there situation so I actually feel compelled to want to do this for the people I truly want to help that are struggling.
You can do it, I will be updating a lot on this website and for anyone that wants more info on where I’ll be posting some motivation nofap content just message me and I’d love to be someone who has helped someone. Thank you again NOFAP and thank you to everyone who read this I appreciate every single one of you! Be strong, know your possibilities, and be FREE!!
“If I want to be free, I gotta be me” –bob proctor
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