I write this on my birthday, which just so happened to be my 127 hoursday. This is probably going to be a long post. I write this for me as much as I write it for my fellow fapstronauts. I was hoping to make a 90 day post, but bugs and life got in the way, so here I am. I’ve gone 127 days without PMO or MO.
I’m not sure what hard mode truly is, but what I did wasn’t easy (as many of you already know). YET here I am.
First and foremost, you can get here too. For me, the pros heavily outweighed the cons and I had to focus on that a few times during this trip to get through some hard urges. When I started Nofap, I had severe PIED. I had been fapping since my single digit years, fapping to porn since 13, and fapping to high speed porn since I was 15. Today, I enter my late twenties a man. Not just because my PIED is gone, but because I feel like I’ve taken control of my life.
For everyone, lives before nofap are different, just like struggles during nofap will be different. Before nofap, I was driven, but only in some respects. I achieved things I set my mind to, but those things were usually work, school, or hobby related. On top of that, I could only work hard for short bursts at a time. I slept poorly, went in and out of depression symptoms, had bad hygiene, incredibly shy around people I wasn’t comfortable with (women fit in this group), and of course, I had PIED.
Nofap has two effects.
It will directly affect your penis health – the less you fap to 2D women (PMO) and the less you fap in general (MO), the faster your natural sex drive will emerge.
- I started getting morning wood again (<14 days)
- I found myself more aggressive (<30 days)
- My PIED went away (>70 days)
- I went from a shy person to a dominant sex partner (>60 days)
Nofap is also the TOOL that helps you realize things about yourself that you want to change. If you use it as a tool to change your life, nofap will indirectly affect your mental health.
- I realized I was a slob and cleaned myself and my environment up (<14 days)
- I slept better (<50 days)
- I felt happier (<45 days)
- My reaction time became faster (>90 days)
As I started seeing changes that I brought about through nofap, I gained the confidence to talk to people. For some of you, nofap is about meeting woman. It shouldn’t be, because meeting women is a side effect of you becoming a better, more confident person. As I started gaining confidence in myself and accepting that women are just people too, I met my current partner. I met her while I had PIED, but rather than running away from the challenge, I went at it head (lol) first. Guess what, I had ED on our first night together, and the second, and the fifth. How I got to the fifth attempt was being honest with my partner about my PIED and nofap. The courage to be honest was a result of nofap. It also helped that I learnt sex wasn’t just about penetration.
The flatline is a very real thing and you just have to live with it. Mine lasted >50 days. Nofapping was easy for me during the flatline, because my libido was almost 0. However when the urge to fap came, it didn’t come from an physical urge, it came from a mental urge sparked by the thoughts that I wouldn’t heal. The ED with my partner happened during my flatline. The urge to give up was very real, but I didn’t return to fapping. Instead I reached out to my fellow fapstronauts. I posted threads and also sent personal messages to people that seemed to have similar problems to me. I encourage you to reach out – that’s why we’re here.
Once the flatline ends, you’re in so deep that you forget how much better you are without PMO. You become used to the new you. When I started getting urges after the flatline, I had to look at my old posts to remind myself of how terrible life was before nofap.
I guess in conclusion, remember that the long term gains outweigh that short term release. Use this subreddit and it’s fapstronauts to your advantage when you need help. And start changing your life with the time you save nofapping.
Here’s a helpful post aggregating all relevant ideas about nofap.
LINK – 127 days: a survival story
by timewindow
INITIAL POST – My 35 day log
Wasn’t completely sure whether I should do a 30 day update, but then I thought, why the f*** not – a key thing I’ve learnt throughout my quest. There are a lot of younger nofappers out there, but I hope this helps the older guys. It’s 5 days late, but here goes.
I’m in my mid-twenties and a virgin. I dated a few people, but social anxiety (probably stemming from my fapping) kept me from going the distance. I would say this started from my first and longest girlfriend. We dated for 3 years, but her religion kept us from having sex. We were in one of those weird states where everything but sex was ok. Now, I’ve MO’d before I could even remember, then porn entered my life and I was PMOing like no tomorrow. That was already a problem, but not having sex while in a relationship made everything worse. I was PMOing maybe 2 times a day. It was bad, but I couldn’t see at the time. Looking back at it, everything that is said about PMO is true – it made me complacent, clingy, indecisive and gave me PIED or at least exacerbated my anxiety induced ED. Not quite traits a woman wants.
Not suprisingly, we broke up because I just wasn’t “manly” enough, but my problems didn’t stop there. I wish I learnt about nofap then, but instead, I spiralled out of control. For the next four years, I fapped til my arms fell off. My hygiene was deplorable, my social anxiety worsened, I mustered enough courage to ask a few people out, but again, it never went far.
What directed me to nofap and yourbrainonporn was my first strip club session 3 months ago. I was getting a lap dance from a gorgeous woman and nothing. I was mayor of limp-town. I don’t know why, but this is what made me realize I had ED, which I later learnt was PIED.
Immediately, I gave up porn, but couldn’t get a grip (haha) on my MO. For me, MO was definitely my underlying problem. I used it as a stress relief for too long in my life, so I gave up fapping 30ish days after I gave up porn. These are some of the things I’ve noticed:
- A few days after giving up porn, I started getting morning wood again. These intensified after I gave up fapping and now I get wood every morning
- The first 2 weeks or so was the hardest time for me. I think I might be in a flatline now, but since then, it has really gotten easier. I’m sure there are hard days to come, but the 30 day mark goes by fast once you get over that initial hump.
- My dedication has improved and laziness has decreased.
- I’m more aggressive (don’t know if that’s a positive, but it’s definitely true) -I sleep better. I used to have a terrible time going to sleep, so this is great. I actually feel tired now around midnight.
- My hygiene improved. This didn’t happen magically, but once the fog of fapping lifted, I realized how disgusting I was and changed my ways.
- A lot less shy. I danced for the first time in my life at a party I went to 2 weeks ago. I’m still not a good dancer, but there was no fear of looking stupid anymore. I was just having fun.
- Women notice me more. This is probably a combination of all of the above, but whatever it may be, I’ll take it. A coworker even asked to have lunch with me.
- Last but not least, I’m happy. I had depression symptoms for a lot of this year and most of those symptoms are gone.
TL;DR moral of the story, no matter how dark and twisted your fapping past is, it’s never too late to start nofap and improve your life. Nofap helps you reflect on your life and naturally you start making improvements in life.
Good Luck. If I can do it, you can do it.
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