It took me forever to finally get here. Ok so what did I learn? Positives: Everything is brighter and much more optimistic. I am a true cynic and depressed person but without PMO dragging me down every day it was much easier to have a happier outlook on life. I still get terrible and ugly thoughts, and am a very paranoid person that has trust issues.
Nofap didn’t fix any of these for me, but it did show me that my thoughts are not something I can control, it’s how I react to them that matters.
Your brain will turn on you in the blink of an eye to get you to PMO. It wants you to be sad and lonely so you can never rise up and get out of your situation. Only giving in to your needs.
But I digress, I’m down 15 lbs. since last year without really trying. I consciously eat better and while I need to develop more of a gym routine, I do work out sporadically around my crazy work schedule. I haven’t been at this weight since high school and it’s not a struggle to stay here. I give NoFap all the props for that.
Women. Well this part is different for anyone. I can maintain eye contact and frequently get looks back. I’ve noticed women checking me out no matter where I am. As soon as I walk into a room I immediately notice three or four women, and I usually get a look or two myself. I believe this is my sexual energy I give off, mixed with a no fucks given attitude which allows me to power through anything.
Negatives: Should not be ignoring this part. My brain will do or say anything to make me think that the people in my life aren’t really good and I should throw them all away and just PMO all the time. I’m not kidding, the hardest part was realizing what the difference is between good ole skepticism and fan fiction my brain was writing to get me to release dopamine.
Desires… I’m always horny. It never goes away, the urges just sit inside me now and I channel it through a rough energy for life. It’s still a big work in progress. While the desires do get easier, it’s still not something I would say is easy or even tolerable. You will be confronted with these while alone, you need to prepare.
What now… I must continue onwards. PMO is like alcoholism for me. I can’t go back and do any of it ever. Not everyone will make that choice but I know that as an addict, I can’t relapse or else I will spiral and go back to my old ways.
I know I only was able to succeed because of an intense desire to not fail and the love and support of this community and those around me. My main focus I want anyone to know in the struggle right now is that you’re not alone, and while this community is great, you need to seek out positive people in your life as well.
I’m 25, dude who has been PMOing since 15. I have been on the Nofap journey for a couple of years but only recently got serious.
Tl:dr. Gets easier, women flock to you if you’re smart about it but the urges truly never go away. Your life is like the ending line to the party “You don’t have to go home but you can’t stay here.”
LINK – 100 Days Clean. What I’ve Learned and What I continue to Struggle With.
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