I have finally done it. 90 days. Here are my observations. First of all, the difference between this attempt and all my failed attempts was that I was very clear with myself about this one. I wrote it down on a piece of paper, I kept that paper in my wallet. Thus, whenever I would open my wallet. (At least once a day) I would see my commitment.
I counted the days on the calendar. I had a clear picture in my mind of the finish line. Where I was headed, and why I wanted to get here.
I purchased an exercise program. Insanity. I highly recommend this, as it gave my body something to be focused on other than PMO. Insanity is rather expensive, but there are plenty of Youtube exercise programs that are free, and with a little digging you can actually find the insanity videos uploaded online.
In general one aspect that has helped me immensely has been the idea of positive trending. I’ve seen this written about many times in this subreddit, but simply seeing your journey as much longer than 90 days. If you relapse, that is part of your path. You are still in a positive trend. The fact that you even see PMO as something to be transcended is amazing, regardless of whether you have successfully modified your behavior yet or not.
Deep down I had the unflinching belief that I would eventually succeed. Yes, I could have made it sooner had I buckled down, but regret lives in the past and is therefore useless.
As far as super powers go, my sexual interaction with my girlfriend has grown far deeper. My experience with ED was only very slight, so it’s not something I can really comment on too specifically. As far as physically, my sex drive is much stronger, and any kind of ED is gone.
I am able to keep better control of myself. But most notably, I am able to stay in the moment with her. Connect to her, rather than be in my own head, and feel mentally and emotionally isolated while going through the mechanics of sex.
** The most effective tool that helped me succeed** was a kind of visualization. The reason why I failed so many times before was because I would lose touch with why I was doing it. I couldn’t feel any differences, couldn’t notice and benefits, so I would lose touch with the “why” of it all. And when you’re trying to use your mind to overcome your body, if you don’t have a good “why” your body is going to win. Because the pleasure of wanting to feel gratification is very immediate and strong.
gTo combat this, I would visualize the version of myself that I was working towards. Being in the best shape of my life. (Which I currently am.) Having incredibly vital energy, being in control of myself, channeling my energy into my desires and aspirations. There were many ways in which I could see this, the point is, that I imagined and experienced that energy and emotion. I reached into the vision in my head and I sampled the energy. Because I have had moments where I felt that powerful, that confident, that amount of flow. And my desire to feel that constantly was what kept me on track.
In summary, whatever your motivations, whatever the reason you are here, I believe it is very beneficial to conquer addiction in any form. This will strengthen your willpower and allow you to gain tools that will help you change in many ways for the better.
Something I truly believe is that you will not move on to the next level up in your life until you have mastered the level you are currently on. I’m not saying that everyone in the world should join NoFap. There are many paths up the mountain, and the view is always the same from the top. But you have been drawn here. You have decided that this is something you want to reconcile, thus it is part of your path.
Once you have mastered it, you will receive a new challenge, a new step to take. But the view will keep getting better and better.
I’m 28. I’ve been using porn since I was about 16
I have learned a lot in the process of this self evolution. If anyone has any questions, feel free to ask.
LINK – First 90 Day Report
By Mysticedge
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