Over the past days, several fapstronauts compiled the list of triggers/behaviors of risk – with the hopes that it may help others identify some of their own as-yet-undetected triggers.
Please note that both the categories and solutions are arbitrary. This is a work in progress and you are welcome to help improve it.
Biological/physical:
- insufficient or irregular sleep. Solution: try to give sleep more importance.
- having a full bladder. Solution: pee as soon as you have the need to.
- shaving one’s genitals (the itchiness from the stubble makes our hands wander). Solution: if possible, avoid shaving during the more critical periods of your PMO-free efforts (e.g., the first week).
- Missing a meal or eating fast food. Solution: pay more attention to how you eat.
Behavioral:
- taking the phone or computer in the room at night. Solution: don’t go to bed with either phone or computer.
- being alone in the house for too long. Solution: find excuses to go outside or to interact with other people in your home.
- going down a slippery slope by saying “oh I’ll just read a couple of sexy stories” or “look at a couple of sexy pictures” and next thing I know I’ve PMO’d. Solution: DON’T START.
- using computer alone in the room. Solution: only use the computer with other people around you.
- long sessions of work which make the mind weak. Solution: take breaks and maybe exercise for 5 minutes every few hours of work.
- smoking pot. Solution: don’t, lol.
- during the shower, touching oneself extensively or playing. Solution: DON’T. In more critical times maybe have a rule where you can only wash yourself with the sponge, not with your hands. Also, consider cold showers.
- taking the phone into the bathroom. Solution: don’t take the phone into the bathroom.
- spending too much time in the bathroom. Solution: limit yourself to a quick bathroom break.
Websites/online content:
- Reddit in general
- 9gag
- Deviantart
- Certain anime
- Youtube
- Music videos
- Tumblr
- Any sort of image based forum or website that contains image searching features.
Thoughts/Psychological/Emotional:
- thinking “I’m so horny right now, I’ll just quickly masturbate now and keep trying to be PMO free for the rest of the week/month/whatever”. Solution: remember the chaser effect and CONTROL your thoughts.
- thinking of X girlfriend. Solution: catch yourself doing that and actively think of something else or busy yourself with something else.
- Thinking about partying etc, getting ecstatic about the girls that I will meet. Solution: catch yourself doing that and actively think of something else or busy yourself with something else.
- feeling unwanted emotions (anger, boredom, sadness). Solution: become more aware of the emotions (maybe through mindful meditation), accept that it’s a temporary emotion, and patiently work on making it pass. Sometimes it’s just about surviving that particular day and hopefully feeling differently in the morning.
- thinking too much about how you’re not going to think about porn – it means you’re thinking quite a bit about porn… Solution: think about something else! Find ways to keep yourself (and your mind!) busy.
Social:
- “after a successful day at work or school or in a social situation i rationalise that im ok and its ok to fap”. Solution: catch yourself in that process and demonstrate its falsehood to yourself.
- stress. Solution: find other ways to deal with stress (exercise, meditation, etc.)
- Being hungover and feeling like death on a Sunday morning. Solution: avoid drinking to the point of hangovers.
- Waking up / morning wood. Solution: get out of bed stat and remember to not have your phone near you.
- Talking to a girl revealing a lot. Solution: after that particular interaction, quickly find a moment to mindfully explain to yourself that you were just exposed to an attractive girl, and that’s OK, and you need to go back to consciously think about other things.
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