I’ve been on Nofap for a while and I first wanna let you guys know how much you helped me understand the struggles my boyfriend was going through at some point. I want to share his/our story to show you guys that anything can be accomplished and maybe give some of you guys some inspiration or something.
My boyfriend and I got together exactly one year ago. At the start of our relationship we were spending most of our time partying or having sex, which made me believe we had the best sex life I ever experienced so far.
Time passed, things got really serious and we decided to move in together. At this moment, I noticed that even if our sex life was still great, we were having way less sex than before. We used to see each other only on weekends and being able to actually live together changed things a bit.
We have a really honest relationship, tell each other everything and have great compatibility. So I felt free to ask him about his porn habits one day when we were watching a movie on our couch. He told me that he was watching porn sometimes a few times a week (he used to finish work before me and was doing it before I got home, never when I was around).
To be honest with you guys, I did watch a bit of porn when I was a teenager but quickly realized it wasn’t my thing and I wasn’t comfortable with it because of moral issues. So when my boyfriend told me he did watch it, I felt uncomfortable and he noticed it was bothering me. We had kind of a fight about it and a lot of conversations about it. He did saw how uncomfortable I was with it so decided to stop PMO altogether. I didn’t realize how much he was addicted to it until a conversation later on.
My boyfriend admitted to me that, when he was single, he used to watch porn and PMO a lot. A lot. Sometimes, he was doing nothing but watching porn all day, reaching a 24 times a day record and ended up watching the weirdest porn there is because normal porn was not effective on him anymore. He used to feel this need (In his own words it was like a gut feeling which can’t be explained properly but it was strong and deep in the gut) to watch porn and had the need to do it again quickly after, and again, and again. When he was in a relationship, he watched it less, even if he admitted still PMOing 2-3 times a day when we were together but living apart.
He never really asked himself if it was a normal thing to do but did think about quitting when he was single and saw things were starting to get out of control. He failed in doing so. When we talked about it, he told me he was still doing it for stress relief more than anything else but did decided to stop when he saw how uncomfortable it made me feel. We used to have sex a few times a week and I couldn’t understand why he had this need when I was coming back home shortly after him and always up for it. It made me wonder if I was doing something wrong, if he was unsatisfied, if porn was providing something I couldn’t, etc… Porn can really make your partner feel unattractive, unwanted and hurt them.
The first few weeks were not easy to be honest but I told him I would do everything I could to help him. We then started having more sex like before until he got a fatline. This flatline lasted a few weeks and it was frustrating for both of us but everything went back to normal eventually. He did have some urges to PMO but didn’t act on them and didn’t have any for a while now.
My boyfriend has been clean since end 2016 and doesn’t want to ever go back. He is now the man he wanted to become and is proud that he stopped. And I cannot express how proud I am of him. I think that our sex life is now better than ever, much more intimate and intense. We love each other very much and got engaged two days ago.
Porn used to have a huge place in my boyfriend’s life but he did get rid of it. I don’t know if our/his story can help other people but guys, you can do it. You have all my support in your NoFap journey. Don’t get mad if you fail and try again. Everybody fails sometimes but don’t give up, you will be able to reach your goal and become who you wanna become x
Note from the Fiancé: Guys you need to believe that you can do it, after talking to my then girlfriend it made me realize what I was doing and how it impacts the love of my life.. The thing is guys when you stop it’s gonna be hard for a few days it really is BUT if you put in the effort and get the motivation then the results are worth it! I see my now Fiancé in a even more beautiful way than I did before, I see myself in a better light, there is no longer something controlling me, I am in control. I am now the man. the man that I wanted to be my whole life, The thing is you Need that motivation otherwise it won’t work (speaking from experience of trying when single for example) but if you find that motivation then you can succeed and the results are amazing, the sex is better, she is more beautiful, and you feel proud to be who you are, Don’t let something like fake sex rule your drive and life, push yourself as you can be better! well that was my little piece, thank you for reading to the end and remember guys NoFap! 😉
LINK – My fiancé used to be a porn addict
By Nausicaal
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