I’ve been lurking on this subreddit for a while now reading posts to stay motivated so I’ve just decided to make an account and post for accountability as well as to share my thoughts on nofap.
I know that most of us here are in the same boat, the developments in technology in the last decade or two have made porn readily available to us in an instant and our primal instincts are loving it. However, the problem is that there is no REAL interaction with a person in porn, the way that sex should be, and the way that we want it to be, it’s a lonely experience.
So we have made the incredibly positive decision to change our lives and have what’s rightfully and deservedly ours: a REAL life. As a 22 year old, porn has been with me my whole life since puberty and I viewed it as a perfectly natural thing (since everyone else used it). My use inevitably spiralled out of control as my brain required it’s daily fix and eventually it took its toll on my personal relationships; ED & messing up with my girlfriend until eventually I realised she deserved better than me. It’s something I will regret for the rest of my life.
It’s only by doing nofap that I’ve discovered the life I was truly missing out on. I’ve typically done it in stages of 2 weeks before relapse but significantly cut down on my porn use which is the real problem here. The furthest I have made it so far is 25 days, every day can be a battle.
Everything is brighter: porn desensitizes your brain to everything! That daily blast of dopamine reduces the number of receptors in your brain so smaller doses of dopamine are not as fulfilling as they should be – meaning it takes more to make you content. With nofap these receptors start to return and along with them; food becomes incredible, exercise becomes a joy where it was once an effort and motivation to do things (to get an alternative fix) is increased tenfold! You revert back to the excitable, social person you were all those years ago before porn.
Girls (and other guys) start to notice you again: As you begin to control your urges and learn how to say no to PMO you become a master of your own body and confidence in yourself increases and hence your true personality will become amplified. You start to let your guard down and become yourself and while this may not appeal to everyone (since we’re all different!) there will certainly be girls who respond to it, girls with whom you actually have something in common. You are generally more socially aware and will actively seek out companionship because you know that you have much to offer.
Hints for controlling urges:
● no edging – just don’t it’ll make it an uphill struggle
● replace it – up until now porn has been a big part in your life and removing it will leave somewhat of a void. Replace it with something you are truly passionate about: for me it is music and playing guitar
● cold showers – controls urges, makes you alright with being uncomfortable which is a huge part of giving up any addiction
● meditation – mindfulness can help you to clear your thoughts and not be an anxious wreck thinking about all the important things you have to do at once, 10 mins a day will make you a calm and collected person, you’ll be suprised at the difference it makes.
● working out – stress relief, physique you can be proud of, you feel great afterwards, gives you a focus by setting yourself goals, day off/day on – join a gym or buy/use your own weights, do it for YOURSELF no one else
Obviously, to the human male, porn is not given up lightly! I have tried to completely remove it from my life many times. But with every relapse I have found that my resolve to give up grows stronger. I realised that porn is not the ultimate satisfaction I want in life, I want and I need to strive for something truly fulfilling, something that’s REAL.
Stay strong fellow fapstronauts we’re all in this together!
LINK – Been trying nofap for about 6 months – observations and advice
by nofyap
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