Never written on here but I’ve been lurking for a few months now, I’ll try and not make it so long but if it is I’ll summarize it at the end. Here goes my story, I’m 25 years old started jerking off probably at around age 11, then started MO’ing to Magazines and porn videos that I stole from my uncles house. Then we got a black box that stole cable and I would fap to that.
I had sex really young at around 13 and didn’t have problems, then at around 15 High speed internet came about and the flood gates opened. I would wack off for hours, I would go to sleep like at 3 or 4am just jerking off, now looking back I have no idea how I didn’t see that I had a problem, I just saw it as normal. So I had a GF at like 16 and I would keep PMO’ing and I would start to get limp sometimes, but I would blame it on the fact that I had already came that day from spanking it so it wasn’t a big deal. At around 18 we broke up and literally every time I was with a new girl I couldn’t get it up or I would get a semi hard and have pathetic anxious sex like that.
Life really sucked, I’m not an ugly guy and never had a problem getting girls, but the fact that I knew my dick wasn’t going to work would just make me anxious and a lot of times I had the chance to sleep with girls and I would use some kind of excuse to get out of the situation because I knew my buddy down there wasn’t going to cooperate. Close to my 22nd birthday I met this girl and we would hang out, she was super cool so I asked her to be my GF and she said yes, well guess what when the time to have sex came up I couldn’t get hard. It was the most frustrating thing ever, it literally consumed my whole day, that’s all that I would think about. So my stupid ass got home and would jerk off to more porn to prove to myself that my dick still worked. Well we have been together for 4 years now and my dick has worked here and there, never the really good boners that I would get with porn.
3 years into the relationship I also start talking to this super sexy Asian chick and when time came to sleep with her nothing happened down there, this entire time I blamed it on performance anxiety and I’m sure that had something to do with it but it wasn’t the cause, the PMO was. Eventually my dick would work here and there and she must have liked it enough to keep letting me do her, but a few months ago it just kinda stopped working and back I went into this bad depression, good thing that we would be a little buzzed when we would mess around because I probably would have had some type of anxiety attack of all the times my dick didn’t work.
Anyways here goes the golden ticket and what worked for me. So I would look at porn everyday, I would jerk off pretty much every night to go to sleep, and edge for and hour or so to porn before I came every night. I would google my problem because I was so stressed about it and came across YourBrainOnPorn probably 3 months ago, I totally stopped looking at porn around 2 months ago and give and take a week or two. I tried not to fap and would do it for a few days and then relapse, in these two months I probably looked at 20 minutes of porn and fapped while doing it and then felt like shit after. However even though I would not look at porn I would still MO and edge quite a bit.
So here is what cured me, I completely stopped looking at porn right, however I completely stopped touching my dick, COMPLETELY, I guess I had death grip as well because it’s been around 15 days and I haven’t touched it and guess what. a little over two weeks ago I tried having sex with my GF and I couldn’t get hard, I hadn’t been able to get hard with the Asian chick for like 2 months. The day before yesterday I had sex with my GF and even though I was super anxious and nervous once I started making out with her I had the biggest hardest boner and the sex was great. You have not idea how good it felt not just physically but psychologically, then the next day which was yesterday the Asian girl wanted to hang out and once again I was super nervous even more with her because I don’t see her often but once we started making out my dick just reacted! I was able to fuck her the entire session without going soft! and I would always go soft during sex with her. Man you guys have no idea how good it felt being able to perform with two different girls on back to back nights without any problem.
So don’t touch your dick brothers, if it’s important for you to have a working dick then just leave it alone, don’t edge don’t do any of that shit, only touch it if you need to pee or when you shower and trust me the benefits totally out weigh the difficulty of going through this. It’s super hard but it’s definitely worth it, you will get the most raging hardons after a few days but don’t edge or even touch it! They will subside after a few minutes and then you can go to sleep or go about your day. No lie now I’m getting boners at minor things, I saw a picture of Sasha Grey with a short skirt on and got hard, before that would never happen I would have to see a video of her getting pounded by a few guys just to get my dick to work. Now I get a hard on from kissing my GF and now my flaccid dick looks much bigger for some reason which is pretty cool.
Don’t give up guys, keep it in your head that you can be cured and that this thing can be defeated and you will defeat it, you have the will power, we all do.
Summary…
25 year old, been PMO’ing for 13 years, doing it to high speed internet for around a decade. Started sex early at age 13 and began having PIED at around age 17, so I have dealt with it for about 7 or 8 years, had a lot of anxiety and I would deal with depression for weeks or months after not being able to get hard with girls. Began avoiding situations to have sex because of the anxiety of not being able to perform.
At 21 Got a new GF even though we would have sex half the time I was semi or couldn’t even really get it up and the times I did get hard I would go limp mid way during sex. a year ago found this really hot Asian girl and I kept having performance problems and the thought of it consumed my life, I couldn’t help but be depressed because I felt like I could never enjoy a normal sex life.
3 Months ago I quit porn but would still Edge and MO to thoughts, and still had problems getting hard after like 5 or 6 weeks of no porn. However 3 Weeks ago I decided to completely stop touching my dick, no rubbing on it no nothing unless I showered or peed, I get raging boners now and just leave them alone and eventually they go down, My penis seems to have gotten it’s sensitivity back and after years of struggling I successfully had sex with two girls on back to back days. I was super nervous with both but when we started making out my penis just reacted and during the sex I never went soft! So there you have it, if you have the will power and you do because we all do then you will stop porn and you will totally stop touching your dick, now it feels bigger when it’s soft and bigger when erect so whatever caused that I’ll take it.
Good luck guys, don’t give up and keep working at it, whether you think it’s performance anxiety or PIED (Probably both) just stop touching the dick and after a while it will get sensitive again and you can have a normal sex life. Thanks for all the success stories that kept me motivated when I was depressed and to you guys struggling, I feel your pain, just remember that you’re not alone and that you will get passed this.
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