First time reaching 90 days! I have had an insane 3 months. Lost the most weight I’ve lost since working out and below 300 for the first time in forever. I asked a woman out and have been going on dates regularly with her. I put in the time and effort to go for my promotion (waiting to hear back but feeling good).
I’m getting back into the habit of reading, putting more time into my music and learning piano which I put off for far too long. I am more confident than I’ve been for some time, I can honestly say I was already emotional but they feel like true real emotions. I’m able to approach things from a more analytical view and instead of clouding/hiding my emotions with porn or masturbation I take them head on.
I will say do I think I did all the because of nofap/pornfree? No, honestly I was working very hard this year to improve, to be the man I wanted but I think it was helpful and helped me understand myself . I save time, I obviously had issues with woman mentally and problems physically. I think I see things clearer and I see women alot less objectively.
I had a friend who I confided with very many times about this and I recommend it, as talking about your problems and how you feel is a big part of this. I also kept a journal for the first 60 days or so. I meditated, made sure to get plenty of sleep, and thanks to wanting to get in shape fixed my diet and regularly exercised.
On the physical front. I think my PIED is clearing up/gone. I pretty much have morning wood every day. Random erections seem to happen more often. Most noticeably, when I’m with the woman I’m seeing, and were holding each other, when she kisses me I’m at full mast. I’m excited by her but not just physically, by everything in that moment. Not sure how I’m looking on the DE front yet but I figure I cant stress about it and will have to give myself time.
I know for a fact I cant go back to porn. I have no interest in it whatsoever. I cant say I wont ever fap again. As of right now I wont because I want to give my self the full time to recover and heal but in the future I don’t think Id feel like a full relapse if I did it every once in a while. I can cross that bridge when I come too it.
I had alot of ups and downs during this time and it wasn’t easy. For those going through its not gonna be and you need too understand that but I can say it was worth every moment of fear, anxiety, of every tear I cried.
P.S. Notice I didn’t use the word superpowers once in my post. I hate that word in this sub. Don’t think about “superpowers”. Think about the better person your becoming, think about the effort, time, emotional investment you put in for this on. There’s nothing heroic going on here, your choosing to be better.
Glad to answer any questions. Here are my 30 and 60 day reports. 30 Days 60 Days
LINK – 90 day report
by zerodashzero
50 days later – PIED cured but DE still ongoing…Any help?
Well It seems like PIED is not an issue for me anymore. I continually can achieve erections with the girl Im seeing and pretty much have no desire to see porn. The issue Ive had the last few times are all DE related. I can go at it for 30 minutes and nothing.
We had sex yesterday after not having not O’d for 8 days and after wards I finished myself off but it took 15 minutes. i defintly know I have death grip issues (i actually think its speed related as i had a less grip but I had to do it vigorously to actually finish)
The girl Im seeing knows all about my giving up porn and not masturbating and she has been great but I think she is getting frustrated with this as am I. Ive read lots of reports on here and reddit about curing this and maybe I just need more time but its very frustrating.
Ever since doing my 90+ days of porn free/no fap Ive masturbated a few times mainly right after sex with the girl Im seeing or a day after but been cutting it out.
My questions are do you guys think I should abstain from it period? I was thinking of implementing a rule that after sex I wont finish myself off at all, that I have to finish in her. How about the fleshlight/light grip plans?