First of all I wanna thank all of you and God for this. It’s been an amazing journey so far. A journey I will continue till the end.
My thoughts:
- It’s OK if you can’t progress fast. We can’t take 10 steps and wonder why we haven’t reached the 1 mile mark. It takes time. I had no progress to speak of the first 1.5 years. Streaks were under 20 days. I started getting 30-40 day streaks from the second half of 2015. I had some five or six 40+ day streaks in 2016. I haven’t relapsed this year. When you do NoFap there will be many relapses but just keep getting up and trying again. You need grit. Do you have it? Never give up. Yes, your self-control is severely lacking now. But do you have it in you to keep trying? If you do, then I know you will post a 90th day one day.
- You know all those triggers? They stop being triggers one day. It’s surreal when I think about it. I wanted to fap the moment I went to take a bath two years back. Now it doesn’t even cross my mind. I sometimes stay up working until 2 am but still don’t get tempted to watch porn. My method was to figure out my triggers and avoid them as much as possible at the beginning. I have relaxed that rule a lot these days simply because those triggers have stopped being triggers. It’s liberating when you realize you can’t be triggered easily anymore.
- You don’t find it annoying to have friends and family hang out with you taking out the opportunity to PMO. I was ashamed at my excitement in the past when my roommates were about to leave for a couple of days. Now, I miss them when they leave. My words are true when I tell them I miss them.
- PMO stops being a coping mechanism. I realised I wanted PMO when I was really sad or stressed. The desire to indulge in it right after feeling sad or stressed was so apparent. I’m going through some seriously tough times in my life now. I felt hopeless once or twice but didn’t get the desire to PMO to cope with it. I either spend my time trying to fix the issue or pray about it or simply worry about it without PMO. Haha.
- Getting rid of PMO isn’t enough. Fill your life with meaningful activities and goals so that you live the right way. You don’t become awesome by not fapping; You become awesome by doing awesome things. This article from cracked.com is worth reading. Also, don’t fill the gap with gaming. Gaming is fine but it shouldn’t be a coping mechanism. Face your fears. Also try out sports. They differ from gaming cause you get physical exercise but more importantly you’ll socialise more. I get a big motivation to stick to NoFap when I engage in or decide to do activities that make me feel like a cool person. Odd but it works for me. Posting in NoFap when you’re down on motivation is also a good idea. I do it when I need it. Help out newbies when you’re here.
- I was socially inept, I was shy, I lacked confidence and self control, I couldn’t talk to girls, etc. All that was when I was 15. I promised myself I would improve and I have managed it in the years since then. It’s also the period where my PMO got worse and worse. So in my case PMO didn’t affect me that way. Also, I haven’t got any ‘super powers’. No girls don’t sense I don’t fap and throw themselves on me. lol. Haven’t experienced anything called flatline either. Perhaps I did but didn’t notice it cause I’m single and doing hard mode. Anyway, my point is that you won’t have to be bad at other aspects in life until you’re good at NoFap. I think it’s liberating. Life can be so much better. Are you willing to work hard and smart to achieve it?
- You will stop cheating on that special person. The one you love. The one who doesn’t know you watch porn behind her/his back. You will put them first. No lies. No guilt. Only love —— and also annoyances and arguments that’s to be expected in relationships. 😉
I’m signing off now. I wish all of you the very best in life. Take care, guys.
by snipergosh
These days I don’t feel the uncontrollable desire to watch porn as soon as I come across anything sexual. I brush it off and go about my business.
I’m single and not into one night stands (Christian), so I don’t have insights regarding how things have changed in sexual matters. But I’ve seen improvements in other areas.
When my housemates leave for another town, I mean it when I say I miss them. In the past I felt excited cause I’d have the apartment all to myself and I could binge.
My libido shot through the roof on the two occasions when I went over 60 days in the past. It was annoying as hell but I’d imagine it’s great news if you are married.
My cousin’s husband is addicted to porn. Great guy but he’s in deep trouble. She looks great but she once confided to me that he doesn’t want sex much but watches porn often. You know a guy is in deep shit when he has a hottie needing sex with him but he prefers to fap rather than bang her. He’s working on quitting it. I hope he does it soon for the sake of their marriage. I don’t know how long it’ll last if he doesn’t change.
During my second streak after I found nofap, I got to 82 days. But I had to come here every other night and read post after post to control the urge. These days I peacefully go to sleep without the urge to watch porn every night.
There are still many other things that would improve if I get rid if this habit completely. Looking forward to it.
Actually I don’t fap to porn much. I just imagine and do it. Even if I do it to porn, I regain control in a day or two and get back on track. I haven’t had these past O cravings much once I’ve stopped the binge.
You don’t go back to square one when you end up PMOing even though your counter does. Keep in mind you’re cultivating a new habit and by extension redefining your character. It takes time —- just like it took time to get this addicted to porn. It’s ok. Just make sure you never lose heart. I urge you to keep on trying. Things slowly do improve as you understand your temptations and find ways to beat it. NoFap involves replacing unhealthy habits (too much gaming for example) with healthy habits (Perhaps getting into some sport. It gives exercise for body and socializing for the mind).
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