I have been watching porn since i was a teenager, around 14-15 years old but i can’t tell for sure. At that time there were magazines and VHS tapes.
Then the computers came around and thus my personal one. It wasn’t long before we got internet connection at home and as you can imagine, i discovered pornography on the web.
During this time, i was also trying to meet a girl and have a relationship, serious or not, it does not matter. I still haven’t been able to do that… The reason? PORN. However, i had many many many chances to do that. Sometimes i was approaching girls, some of them responded and some of them not, logically. Sometimes i was the one who got approached, and quite a few of them were quite hot. I was thinking… how can this woman be attracted to me?
Anyway, among the stress and confidence issues that i face, porn was the was the most serious one. I cannot say that i was addicted to porn. It was more like a convenient way to relax and release the stress… Because of my luck of confidence, i could not approach women and when i did, i messed it up. Every single time. So, I stuck with porn.
I did though had sex a few times, if i can call it ‘sex’. I have experienced what i am sure most of you already know ‘erectile dysfunction’ every single time i tried to had sex. Why? Cause my mind got used otherwise… I needed porn movies to turn me on. I thought: ‘how can it possible be? there is this naked woman in front of me wanting to have sex with me.. AND I CANNOT GET AN ERECTION. WHAT IS HAPPENING?” But, of course knew the answer deep down. Those few times i had sex, it was very short, a few minutes actually. It made me very sad.
I knew i had to stop watching porn and try to meet girls, whether it was a one-night-stand or a relationship. I was weak and until recently i could not do it.
During the Xmas holidays i met with the family as we do every year to celebrate. One of my cousins had exactly the same problem. Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction. We discussed this when we met and he offered to help me. I hesitantly said OK, it is about time to change things. He advised me to stop watching porn. Stop cold. Just like that.
So, during these 18 days of not watching porn and nofap, i had sex with 3 women. With the first woman, i had trouble having an erection like the previous times, and when i did, i ejaculated very quickly.
With the second one, i had an erection, but i could not ejaculate, i could not even perform…
BUT, the third time was a 100% success. Not only i have had super hard erections, i could also ejaculate twice within one hour. I left her house and i was feeling ecstatic. Outside was extremely cold, i couldn’t even feel it. I started laughing without any reason, just out of pure happiness.. i knew right there that the period of 15 years of loneliness and luck of sexual experiences has come to an end. I knew this because i proved to myself that my organs were working perfectly. The problems obviously were: 1. my mind was used to watching porn and 2. lack of interaction with women (not necessarily sexual).
So, its been 18 days without masturbation or porn. I can say that i have not yet felt the urge to watch porn and i believe i can stay away from that for a long time. Who knows.. maybe for ever. I am determined to do this and i will not stop, nor fall in the same trap again.
Your comments and questions are all welcome.
Thank your for your time 🙂
LINK – I have just started the NoFap journey.
by minderc
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