It’s been almost 3 months (with 3 relapses) now. I wanted to wait for a while before writing the philosophical stuff that you are about to read. Why? because I didn’t want to jump to conclusions too fast. Now that I’ve earned a decent amount of time from my experience, I think I’m ready to spit it out. So this is all about fapping and anxiety, nofapping and well-being. I’m convinced that fapping and anxiety are closely linked. Why? 20 years of fapping proved to me that fapping fucks with your brain so you become a zombie addict all your life.
So here’s my story: since I kicked fapping from my life, I have this overwhelming feeling of well being, general confidence and happiness.
I’ve been eating healthy, doing sport and improving my pro skills. It is fair to think that those are the main reasons why I feel this way. Well, I’m 100% positive that they play a minor role in this story.
To explain, I have to go back 6 years in my life. I was in my mid-20’s. I had the hottest girl on earth, was successful at work and was very fit. Me self confidence was peaking at the highest level of my life. Of course I didn’t know anything about nofap. Back then, I was addicted to PMO. And although I felt great at times, it was more like a roller coaster than an stable feeling. Right now, I’m in peace with life. I feel balance. Back then, I was either extremely happy or extremely sad. And that’s because fapping was messing with my mind to make sure I will be feeding the addiction for years to come.
A couple of years after the high period, you would find me alone and miserable. No girlfriend, some problems going on and highly addicted to PMO. My life would consist of a void work-eat-fap-sleep cycle that threw me deep into the pit of human misery.
In this period, I was a really troubled guy. Somehow PMO managed to take over my nofap time to change my perception of life. I used to see all my wrongs as a person and not a single right. Depressed and miserable, my addiction lead me to fall into the darker deeps of extreme sexual behaviour (not gonna give details but let’s say it was stuff waaay out of the normal spectrum).
During that time, I had this overwhelming feeling of anxiety. Always worried about the future. I used to over-think problems and ruminate for hours. Social Anxiety. Erectile disfunction. Unable to share intimacy with anybody. I felt powerless, miserable and sad … probably the saddest guy on earth. A victim of an unfair world.
Fortunately, living for a couple of years in that terrible state gave me the strength to find a solution to fix myself. That solution came in the form of zillions of self help material. Self-esteem, social skills, mental tricks to overcome anxiety… That material was useful but there was something still missing. Something that was preventing me from seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. That was fapping.
Yes my dear bros. Fapping was this fucking huge obstacle in the middle of my road to happiness. Since I stopped it, all the sadness, anxiety, doubts and fears about myself and the future are FUCKING GONE.
As I said at the beginning, I didn’t want to jump into conclusions too fast. I didn’t want to be that guy that nofapped for 2 days and posts “OMG I can fly now!”. I think that 3 months are enough time to claim that nofapping cured my social anxiety, my cronic low self esteem and my worries and fears about the future. Bear in mind that I’ve been addicted for 20 years.
It is fapping, I’m sure. During my binges I would go to work thinking that nobody liked me, fearful to express my opinions, and procrastinating like a bitch. Now I’m friends with almost everybody, stand my personal and pro boundaries openly and perform like a star.
Somehow when you are so addicted (I was for 20 years), your brain triggers your anxiety levels so your whole life gravitates around coming home at night and choking the duck’s neck for hours. Fapping makes you feel stressed so you stop feeling that pain when you fap.
These are my greatest two revelations learned from nofap so far:
1) Fapping gives you extra stress and anxiety so you need to relieve it (stress-fap cycle).
2) Fapping eats a fucking huuuuge amount of time in your life. Seriously dude. In money terms, I’d say that fapping was a 60% tax on my salary. The number of things that I can do now with my free time is amazing.
Sorry for the wall of text and thank you for making a better self out of me. You guys fucking rock.
TL;DL: Fapping gives you a hell of anxiety when you are addicted to it. It also eats a lot of time. Stop your addiction now!
LINK TO POST – my experience with fapping and anxiety
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