So I’ve been lurking around these parts for sometime now and decided that today was a good milestone to finally post. It’s been 8 weeks to the day since I last masturbated, the longest break of my life since hitting puberty 20 years ago.
I became interested in NoFap when I saw a TED talk a couple months back and started to read up on how fapping is connected to addiction. The movie “Thank You for Sharing” was also inspirational in a way and I recommend it to those that can handle some triggering material.
Upon seeing the similarities between drug addiction and various sex addictions, I immediately became less interested in fapping and soon began my sobriety. I think this is in large part due to my strong aversion to drug usage and I’ve reframed it into the same category. It’s rather ironic though as I’ve let myself become addicted to lots of other, non drug, things like video games, television, compulsive spending and obviously fap itself. I’m also battling those demons with varying degrees of success right now but I digress.
As far as other symptoms, I never really had much of an issue with ED, although there where a few times with my ex that were probably related. My porn tastes also never migrated much and I actually had found myself turning away from the more violent and degrading stuff a long time ago. I would also go through periods without porn, just using mental fantasy and reading erotica, so I think I was naturally resetting myself to a small degree.
Overall the experience has been positive. I did notice the surge at the beginning that many people report along with a flatline afterward. I seem to be coming out of the flatline period now since my morning wood is normally there to greet me again. I’ve noticed an increase in my ability to socialize, as meeting people in the eye seems easier and I’m more willing to engage with people casually. I can’t say for sure on this though, as it is something I’ve been focusing on improving anyway.
I’ve also noticed a renewed interest in life in general and have been actively looking to meet women again, at least through online resources. I still haven’t addressed my social anxiety enough to get past my shy awkwardness and introverted nature. To go along with not fapping, I also started exercising again regularly, eating better and sleeping more, so I’m sure that has all helped as well.
As far as negatives go, the only real issue has been with any kind of arousal response causing seminal leakage and the mess that that causes. Otherwise, the other “negatives” I would actually consider positives. This includes facing my loneliness after being separated from ex and being celibate for 18 months, facing my issues with social anxiety, and facing the other addictive behaviors that I’ve taken up as a way to hide from reality.
I can honestly say that I think fapping is now permanently in the past for me, as the new frame that I have for it makes it very undesirable. That would probably be my best piece of advice for anyone who is struggling to stay on the wagon. Just find a way to reframe it into something that is repellent for you. That said, you’ll want to be careful here, as you could easily wander into other dark places if you choose your frame wrong.
One last thought here is that in this process it’s best to try and correct and improve yourself without judgement. We’re all human and self improvement is hard enough without the inner critic constantly jabbering at you, so feel free to put some duct tape over that asshole’s mouth That said, remember that the goal is to move forward, so don’t wallow in complacency either.
I hope this helps someone else. I know that writing it down has been good for me.
Thread: 8 Weeks
BY – rambling_mammal