I started masturbating at around 10 to clothed pictures of girls in magazine, also would watch scrambled playboy channel on the TV late night and would sometimes go 5 times in a night at the age of 11-12 on the weekends cause I was bored.
Once I hit 7th, 8th grade and the girls in my class started looking more and more women-like I would M in the shower with lubricant every night imaging them naked or me having sex with them. It must have been around age 13 I saw my first real porn magazine with straight up exposed female genitalia and I loved it. So then I guess I escalated cause all I wanted was to stare at specific girls V’s I really liked in the mags and fab. Mid-high school I found my first porno VHS that had a bunch of different scenes on it, then I switched to needing that for M and O. I realize now that I look back, I stopped M to fantasy with real girls by age 13. That is in my opinion the healthy and normal M of young adult males that has probably taken place for thousands of years. The problems start when your focus changes to constant M novelty with false women in pixel form.
I am lucky because I did not have hi speed internet until I was 18 and started college. At that time, high speed was still not widely used and there were no tube websites, however, you could download stuff. It just sickens me to think of all the college years I wasted hunting for new porn scenes to download and M too, when I should have been out lifting weights and hunting for real women to have meaningful sex with everyday. Well in college I had my share of drunk hook ups, but I never got a hard on and always just attributed it to being drunk. Then I met a girl I must have chased for 2 years (lots of other hook ups along the way with ED, but I really wanted to get with this girl) So back then I thought porn may be contributing to my ED so I stopped watching for 3 weeks when I finally got in a dating situation with this girl, and when it came time to do the deed, boom the Dick worked all night, but I could not Orgasm. After about a week of regular sex with this girl I did however achieve my first O from pure vaginal stimulation (age 23), and let me tell all you guys, it is such an awesome feeling when that happens with a girl you can tell is totally into you when you are having sex with her. Anyway, she gets weird and my sex stops and she moved away. That is when I went on a long sad streak of no sex and lots of M to porn. From ages 22-25 I had maybe 3-4 drunken hook ups, but all with Porn-induced ED. My porn viewing really escalated during this time to some very hardcore stuff (bodily fluid, sadistic stuff, really awful) and I would M 1-3 times a day.
Then at 25 I started professional school and thought to myself, I need to get into better shape and stop watching so much porn. I still didn’t think the porn was causing my ED, but I did start running and doing pull ups, looked much healthier, and really cut down on the porn and M. So by the end of my first year of professional school, I was sleeping with the same girl as mentioned above again, only this time I suffered from delayed O and weak erections. Very sad about that at the time. That did not work out and during my second year of professional school, I had a few nights of ok sex with no O, but then I got a girlfriend that lasted for 5.5 years, from 27-32, I wont get into all the details, but porn ruined that relationship.
I had ED issues and stopped having sex with her because I was seeking the novelty of PMO instead. I found YBOP when I was 31 and did do a 90-100 day stretch of no porn, but I still M when I felt like it. During this stretch my GF and I had a lot of sex and my I was finally getting rock hard morning wood again like when I was 13, and I had no problems with PIV O, but I relapsed into PMO again and the cycle continued. So she ends up with a new guy that will have sex with her all the time(big surprise). I was devastated for a while, so what did I do, escalated my porn use.
So flash forward to May 30th. I met this new girl who is really great. We met at a dance club, danced, talked, made out, and I ended up back at her place and we both got naked that night. Luckily she didn’t want to have sex, but I had a lifeless D the whole time anyway. That was the absolute turning point for me. We started dating, I stopped watching porn. 13 days in I knew she wanted to have sex bad, but with a condom (I hate condoms) so I cheated and took a Cialis, but got hard and kept an erection for intercourse with a condom on for about 2 hours, then I fell asleep. The next day she gave me a BJ to O after I had been drinking all day, again progress. That same night I had sex with no condom on for a while with no O, but I kept an erection for a while. The next morning I pleased her first, then was able to get an erection and have an O to pure vaginal stimulation..so thankful for this. I wouldn’t say I relapsed, but over the last 2 weeks I have M at home thinking about some of the sexual things me and this girl have done together, but my ED has not come back since M, I think this might be because I am M to things I have done with her or want to do to her. I am def going to buy a fleshlight and use that for M from now on, as I think it promotes the right sensation on your penis to be more ready for the real thing.
My parting words to you guys is this. My ED can be cured fairly quickly because I did not start on Tube porn, instead a good portion of my Masturbation from 11-13 was from good ole fashioned fantasy with real girls. However, I royally F’d up my brain and pleasure centers and still have a long way to go before I can 100% rely on hard erections without delayed O. Real women are really helpful. Training your brain for pleasure from foreplay, smell, touch, flirting, a girls smile, and the feeling of absolute elation when she wants to give herself to you is the natural way our ancestors brains were trained to get erections. That pleasure is so much better than the false foreplay pleasure of clicking a mouse, looking a disgusting sex acts on a screen, and getting O from watching poor lost souls being dehumanized for our viewing pleasure.
I will never watch porn again. Not sure how I feel about the no M thing. I find that when I don’t M for 7-10 days it gets harder for me to O and get an erection, and that was from my previous reboot. I really think for me personally, if its not death grip and I am thinking about real girls M is not a problem for me 1-2 times a week. That has never caused me to not get erections, it has and always will be the evil porn that I will never watch again. The real thing is so much better and now I feel like I have to get out there and make up for a lot of lost time.
Please feel free to comment and ask me any questions about my story.
POST – Age 33, success with a new women, years of porn addiction and PIED
BY buckpelvis
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