I will say this…from personal experience: Porn is addicting; I found relief in finding and accumulating as much of it as I could – even though I would never return to anything I actually downloaded because I was looking for more, needed stuff that started to get on the fringes.
Then I went from Straight porn and crossed over to bisexual, gay porn – just to find the next best thing to get off to. I would routinely ignore my wife, her needs, her advances. I could not wait to get off again – and I could not do it without visual stimulation from pornography. Refractory period or not, I would do everything I could do to climax again – I have read extensively a lot of neuroscience articles on this as I have somewhat of an education as well as a physician. I will say I could feel the actual dopamine rush in my brain at time of orgasm; I could feel this in my brain if I had an orgasm without an erection and without any semen production.
If this is not addiction – I don’t know what it is. It came down to my wife catching me, and talking to other professionals for me to believe this. Because I could cite a lot of BS about the non-addiction of pornography coupled with masturbation.
Nine months into “recovery” – I am not porn free, and it is a struggle I feel particularly when stressed out. My wife and I talk more; I am able to have an erection with my wife again, I am able to have an orgasm with my wife again (therefore releasing oxytocin/dopamine rush and re-igniting the physical bond i.e. reward/release mechanism between us.
My Porn started at an early age with an uncle that was only 2.5 – 3 years older than myself, and my dad’s penthouse stash. I have four children, and I work vigorously, especially with my boys, from viewing pornography. It’s too easy. Maybe genetics make me predisposed to addiction – I don’t know. I have warned all my children of this cycle that does not replace human bonding – and in a relationship may well be very selfish.
Masturbation is natural; it comes from natural exploration…maybe more so with boys because of early morning erections and nocturnal emissions. Masturbation is not bad – within context. Pornography is not a great sex ed tool; it is not a reflection of what real sex is even like. It might be great for ideas to spice up the sex life – but not at the start.
I am NOT a neuroscientist, and I do not list any references but to only highlight my own personal experience as a physician. I am not referring to any recognizable names of friends here. I am giving ONE data point from personal experience that was and still is difficult to overcome. Fortuna lists some very valid and statistically sound, juried evidence on the relationship of FosB – I agree. Chemical changes occur in the brain.
For me – There is absolutely NO DOUBT about porn/masturbation addiction, and it is only intensified by a culture that is moving away from human to human interactions.
You decide for yourself.
“That’s about all I have to say about that…” – Forest Gump
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