I did it! 90 days PMO free. It’s been crazy, wonderful, and tough. (I decided to tell as much of my story as I can remember. I feel it’s important to show that this journey is never linear, never going straight from point A to point B). 20 years old, started MO so young that in the beginning I didn’t even have any semen to ejaculate (wtf kid me, what a dumbass).
I can’t remeber when MO teamed up with P, but I’ve been resenting that collaboration for a long time.
Jumping ahead to high school, I started to PMO daily, binging during the weekends (bad times, those four years). I got so bad that it was then that I noticed how desensitized I was becoming (the P that I started to search for was concerning me). So I tried to lay low, cut down to once every few days. It worked for a while, and I was back on my destructive way, thinking I got this PMO under control.
Starting college I might even dare to say I improved myself a bit even without NoFap. I met people around which I could relax and be myself more. PMO was still a big part of me, but something started to gnaw at me more and more. I came across NoFap a couple of times during my searches, always laughed it off. How I praise the day I didn’t close the tab, but stayed and read some posts.
I’ll be honest, I didn’t think much of this “reboot thing”, so I didn’t fully commit. As before, I cut down to every few days. Ups and downs with that. During my first year, when my finals started, all this NoFap information got organised in my head and said “Dude, stop fucking jacking off and then studying. It’s not working!”. I passed all my finals, PMO-ed once a week during that time. Forgot about it the moment school was over, back to regular PMO (“regular PMO”, like any of it is normal. What a dumbass).
My second year, second semester got REAL. I started one week, two weeks, three weeks max. streaks, got super depressed when I relapsed, not realising the true reason(s) for my relapses. Started reading more posts, more advices, more success and relapse stories. Then came the finals. “Use the extra energy, channel it into someting productive”, that was my mantra for the next 45 days. 45 whole days. I made this account, badge on 0 days. I passed all my finals, PMO-ed the second they finished, went on a month long binge. After that, reset my badge. 90 days have gone by, hard mode reboot, no PMO!
Today, I can say that my binge relapse after 45 days was necessary for me. I needed to fail once I experienced the benefits to know what I lost. A life lesson I will never, ever forget.
—The benefits—
- No brain fog
- Better concentration
- Better image of self-worth
- Improved confidence (so much, my friends, so much!)
- Less social akwardness
- Less shyness
- Clearer face and body (went from ~half-dozen huge zits and a lot of black spots at the same time to one (max two) medium sized zits and 60-70% less black spots)
—Final thoughts—
Thank you all for making this sub a place where porn addicts can come and not be judged. The amount of support you, as a community, give to old and new fapstronauts never ceases to amaze me. Feel free to ask me anything. Thank you for reading this.
LINK – 90 days finally completed!
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