Age 23 – My mind is strangely clear, pure, BEAUTIFUL

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I’ve been on Nofap for 2 years, but now I have drastically reduce the amount of fapping to 2 times a week. I used to fap 4~7 times a day since before my puberty (11yo). Yeah, that shit destroyed me.

Now, as you can see on my badge, I’m on day 2 but have greatly reduced. The peeking was causing the minor relapses. BUT I WILL NO LONGER GIVE UP TO URGES AND NEVER PEEK AGAIN, because what I’m experiencing now is priceless.

Seriously, what is happening? Out of nowhere come this memories of feelings and sensations, from tastes, movies and experiences in general.

I was about to sleep and suddenly came this memory about grape ice cream and how much I used to love that shit when I was a kid. This shit hit me hard and out of nowhere; me, standing above the multiple ice cream flavors e looking at the purple ice cream; the flavor took over my body. This blue ice cream (in my country[Brazil] we called it “piece of the sky) also came in the memories. Suddenly I feel this magical desired to eat ice cream; not as a craving, but as a desire for a contemplative experience of taste. I want to taste FLAVORS of EVERYTHING. I haven’t thought about these sensations for more then 10 years and they are all came back out of nowhere. I cried like a bitch when they hit me, because I remembered how much free I was when I was a kid.

I also can remember clearly about the movies I’ve watched more than 5~10 years ago, pick them apart, scene by scene. I can enjoy them more. Before they were just random images and sounds on a TV.

My mind is strangely clear, pure, BEAUTIFUL. Seriously, my mind IS FUCKING BEAUTIFUL. And you know what? I don’t want to feel like before never again. I also don’t want to be near people like that. Oh god, how the fuck I was able to date an awesome girl being like that, how was she able to stand me, to love me? PMO fucked our relationship because I was numb emotionally and felt no desire to have sex because of Porn; I was distant, almost never present.

One of the coolest changes I have notice is the self-respect. But not in a usual way; you PROTECT yourself from yourself. I believe there is this week person inside of us; it wants comfort and pleasure. Now I feel a REAL and STRONG self that protects me from this week motherfucker. It’s a strength that ignores the voice of the week motherfucker, throwing him away from my mind. With time I’m sure he will disappear.

I’m 23. I’m quite “old” in the nofap scenery, been trying for 2 years.

Guys, please, share your similar(or not) stories. I’m sure I have much much more to go through, but I’m here to share what’s happening to me so all of you can gain the motivation to keep going.

My attraction to real women has returned, but it’s weird. I’m still getting used to it. You see, the “attraction” you think about is different; you see women in a different way. It’s bizarre. You feel attracted by the feminine energy they emanate, not they appearance. You “feel” them, rather being only stimulated by their looks. When I fapped a lot, women were kind of a thing that I wanted to fuck because society told me to do it and get status from it. Now when I feel attraction is a REAL attraction, I want to FEEL the girl. It’s so weird because many times I didn’t actually felt any attraction for the girls we see in media; Its almost like they felt fake. But now the attraction is more focus on the feminine energy.