I hesitated a lot to tell my story (trolls really annoy me, and less porn is also less internet), but I think my point of view might be interesting, and also, I’m bored at work.
I’ve watched porn daily since the age of 15, I’m 33 today. I’ve seen a therapist for 10 years because I have anxiety problems, and with his help things were OK, but I was still very weird with the ladies and scared of most people. He told me that is because I see myself as a picture and not a complete human being (it might be difficult to understand but actually it makes sense). In February this year I had the idea it might be because of porn, and I stopped.
It was VERY difficult, especially the first months when I was totally chaotic. After three months I began to be calmer but I was still quite depressed. Because the point is, I’m deep within very angry, against my family, against my job, against a lot of things, and porn helped me to contain all that anger and change it into something weird but inoffensive. And suddenly all was free and I did not know how to contain it anymore.
Now, what I did. First, and I know it seems to be a huge debate on this sub, I did not stop masturbating. My therapist told me I shouldn’t. Just: no porn. I used my mind. I will not lie to you, in the first month it was very frustrating. But after some time, it became more and more satisfying, because I can put some sweet music for instance and the most important, I can masturbate thinking about girls I know, and it can be very satisfying indeed. Second: sport. I go to the swimming-pool 3 times a week, I do each time 30 minutes, it’s not very much but it’s enough and not to exhausting. And finally, I go out more often. I’m doing two activities this year, writing and improve theater, and it’s doing me a lot of good. I’m not all the time before Netflix anymore, I’m not scared of my boss anymore, and I can have deep conversation with my friends, which was not possible a few month ago because I was exclusively a listening guy. Now, people LISTEN.
OK, now I know it’s difficult to trust someone on the internet, but trust me, I feel better now than before I stopped. Suddenly I have a future in which I can decide something, it was not the case before. I see some people on this sub are struggling, believe me it’s a good thing to stop. If it’s too difficult, try sport or seeing a therapist, or not doing this alone and having someone to talk to.
Keep courage!
LINK – After 8 month without porn, I’m finally fine
by _matoche_
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