I have reached 90 days. I have never reached 90 days before.
Before starting NoFap, I was watching porn and masturbating almost daily. I was using porn in the car, at home and at work. I risked by marriage, my career and even risked being arrested. My porn use escalated to paying for escorts.
What have I been doing since I admitted that my porn consumption is a problem?
I have been eating better and exercising daily. I have been on streaks lasting from 2-3 weeks; not able to get over the hump. When my wife has he period, I would occasionally watch porn and/or visit a prostitute.
What have I been doing different this time around?
I have found a porn blocker that I cannot get around. I have found an accountability partner whom I speak with at least once a week. I also completed the Strive program. I am currently working on the Fortify program. I have read a number of books and articles on porn addiction and recovery.
How am I feeling?
I am waking up with a brighter attitude. There is a new spark in my sex life with my wife. Although I am still having some withdrawal symptoms I have a positive attitude that being anti-porn is not anti-sex. I turn to companionship of a real person instead of acting out sexually with porn or a prostitute. I am feeling more connected with my children and my family. I am not feeling as stressed, overloaded or as angry. I am less tired from sneaking into the bathroom late at night to PMO.
What do I see in the future?
I am not falling into the trap of believing that using porn is just a one-off. So far I feel a connection with NoFap and my accountability partner to discuss my porn use freely without shame. I have more money in my bank account. I will continue to be more punctual and more attentive at work. I want to start reading more. I will continue to note my triggers and avoid them. If I am turned on, I will continue to divert my attention and let the urge pass me by.
LINK – 90 Day Beginning
by Veritech
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