From a PMO, weed, drugs, cigarettes, paid sex addict to become a clean person now in just 4 months has been a great achievement from me.
Perhaps, I have sunken down so low that the only way to go was up. And the past has been a great lesson for me to realize how brainwashed I was about the meaning of liberty. When I could beat multiple addictions and emerge victorious ( though it’s still a lifelong battle ), it’s possible for each one of you to change everything about your life.
@DeludedSoul @0Cool0 you really pushed me to finish this post faster
Benefits in 120+ Days
- Clear Skin.
- Bright Eyes. I can stare at people for so long and make amazing eye contact. Eyes are the gateway to your soul and when the soul has been cleansed with good habits, simple food, generous deeds, meditation – only a few would dare to make contact with you for they are filled with guilt and shame.
- Faster beard and moustache growth. Though I already had a great beard growth and facial hairs, the speed certainly seems to have picked up. Have you noticed the same? Do let me know.
- Better hair. I oil my hairs just once a week and still, they are having a pretty good growth and require very less maintenance.
- This one is important to me. I had a rhinitis issue for quite some time ( since 12th grade ). I used to hear hissing or some leaking sound ( very high frequency) if I used to have conversations for long/ if I used to listen to songs at a high volume that always used to drive me mad and left me concerned about my ear problem. I even got my ears checked multiple times and thought there might be some problem in the membrane. My dad had been operated a decade back for the same issue and I thought I might have the same issue in the future. But now, right after I started NoFap, the issue hasn’t bothered me once and I think it’s cured. Though I used to avoid listening at full volume for some time, now I am glad that I can do that without that sound troubling me anymore.
- Music sounds awesome and crystal clear. Even with my mediocre earphones, the sound quality seems to be amazing. Have you felt that the music quality seems to improve as you go without fapping for long?
- No joint and backache issues. When I was fapping 2-3 times a day, I would always notice some sort of restlessness and back pain. I always used to wonder on what the issue might be but never realized that PMO was causing it.
- Better mood.
- Postive vibes about future even though I am almost financially broke now. Feeling that everything is going to be okay.
- More Energy.
- Amazing concentration. I spend 2-3 hours each day reading and it’s been really since some time that I was able to do that.
- Return of self-respect and self-confidence. When the soul has been cleansed from inside and the guilt and shame associated with PMO vanishes, a man returns to his state as the nature intents. Isn’t that too implicit?
- Feeling happy and blissful for no reasons. The chirping of birds, smiling of young kids, walking on the green grass barefoot, climbing and sitting on a tree branch, exploring some unknown place – all little things make so so happy now.
- Able to shed off extra pounds and now I look so young now.
- Better immunity. Semen is the kind of body and when the king is strong, no illnesses can trouble you. It was common for me to develop cold, fever or a cough once in a while but I have been in my best health in the last four months. That’s amazing for sure! Did you also observe the same?
- Better connection with my spirit and developed some faith in Bhagwan (God) even though I was calling myself an atheist since I started getting indulging in PMO/ other desires.
- I had this pathetic habit of scratching my scrotum and D for I always used to feel itchy. No more of that feeling now. I always used to wonder on what impression I would give when I go to someone’s place and they always find me scratching.
- Girls attraction was intense near 50 days but it has now gradually subsided. Moreover, I ain’t checking out females and never look at them like I used to and so I am not even sure if I am being checked out. And anyhow, my goals are more important to me at this point in time.
- Lesser sleep required to recover.
- I have become more generous/ less self-centred. I enjoy feeding puppies each day, giving lifts to students whom I find very often, talking to old-aged people and feeding to pigeons a few days in the week. I have been never like this before and all this is unbelievably satisfying.
Note – I have provided the U.S. And India’s Amazon links for I order often from both these sites. Please Copy the book name and find the respective books for your country if you are from any other nation.
A FEW ADVISES
Have a proper reason to do this.
If you are doing this to get involved in sexual acts again/ to improve your D issues/ to please your gf/ to make out with escorts, you would be back to square one sooner for you aren’t here with the right intentions. A Few proper reasons are –
- To cultivate health.
- To live a debauchery-free life as He recommends/ for the religious purposes.
- For your life goals and career for the seminal energy would allow you to work at higher frequencies and attract the money and opportunities you need.
- For your family or your loved one.
I did it to cultivate my health and now since I have been deeply drawn to Hinduism teachings and philosophies, now the religious purposes are further strengthening my purposes.
Remind yourself each day in some way. Please.
What do I do to remind myself? I come to NoFap, read things that align with my purpose ( Reset & Relapse Section is my favourite though ) and leave a few replies that help others and further strengthens my reasons. You don’t have to do that but you must do something to remind yourself each day.
Start a journal in reboot log section and pour your feelings, action plans or your daily life so that you remain committed. Moreover, once you start a journal, you end up inspiring a lot of others too and that may create a chain. You still believe that you don’t have power?
Or Get a new notebook and write about this issue. What has M/ PMO done to you? How does it make you feel once you are done? What are your reasons? Can’t you spend a month making notes about this addiction each day which has probably ruined decades of your life? That reflects your seriousness. I did that when I started here and I still refer or read my notes before I go to sleep.
Or why not come to this site each day, choose a forum topic that most appeals to you and spend half an hour on it. Reply to others. Help others. Not only it reinforces right thoughts on your brain but also allows you to continue streak with ease.
Or why not create a note in your smartphone and refer to it each day? Or why not stick some notes somewhere in your home where you can give them glance at least a couple of times.
There are so many ways to do this. You would have to spend some time initially and then you have to be persistent after that. Enemy strikes hard when you forget your purpose or let go off things that you were doing. Nothing except the repentance would be left then. How do you remind yourself these days anyhow and do you have better tips? Do you think it’s important?
Be careful about the Food you eat.
Just a simple advice regarding food. Eat in moderation. And eat high-quality food. The food you are eating is going to become part of your body and your soul. Should you then not allow only the best food to enter your body so that it promotes your well-being and great mental functioning?
And have control over this tongue that wants to taste exciting things. This is an amazing instance that I read from a book which I found worth sharing.
“Justice Mahadev Govind Ranade’s wife served some mango slices to him. He took only two of them and told his wife to distribute the rest. His wife was surprised, “These are such good mangoes! So sweet and lovely! So aromatic! Don’t you like them?” Ranade said, “If I take more of what I like, my weakness for taste will increase. I do like mangoes, but don’t want to be obsessed with their taste. Slavery to the mind and senses degrades the individual. I do not want to pamper my greedy palate. Rather, I would like to distribute the thing I like in order to cultivate self-restraint. I want to change my habit of enjoying something into that of just utilizing it.” This is a wonderful way to fight attachment. If you like something, don’t enjoy it by consuming it. Enjoy it by giving it to others. In this way, one should try to get rid of desire rather than becoming a slave to it.”
– From Divine Inspiration – The Secret Of Eternal Youth ( U.S. link / India link )
I eat once a day and have a two-hour window in which I consume food. It’s mostly the home cooked food with a lot of healthy fat, dry fruits, curd, legumes and some carbs in the form of brown rice. I then have a glass of banana shake and spinach juice. Is anyone here a vegetarian like me?
Eating excessive food/ things that excite passion like wine, meat, eggs, deep fried or overcooked things should be minimized or altogether stopped. Remember, eat to live and don’t live to eat.
Be careful about the Internet Addiction.
All these apps and social media sites are designed for one thing: Use your time and productivity to make them money. It’s all an illusionary world that would leave you completely hollow. These apps are designed to give you instant mini-dopamine hits every time you use them so that you keep coming back to them each day while they rob you physically, mentally, keep you dependent and they suck money from your pocket while adding a little value.
The smartphone is an amazing device if used rightly. Why not use it to learn new languages? Why not use it to read millions of books available at your finger-tip? Why not use it to get access to fitness training programmes and get into your best shape? Why not use it to support sites who have a great cause? Why not use it to subscribe to amazing channels that really add productivity to your life? Why not use it to learn new skills? Why not use it to improve your photography skills? Don’t you know all the amazing and productive things that can be done with this amazing gadget?
Get rid of social media sites. They are full of triggers. It was very painful for me to delete my facebook account with more than 1000+ friends but the life has become so peaceful after that. Why do you have to be on multiple social sites that add no value to your life? Don’t you think that person who truly cares about you would make you a call and talk to you rather than dropping those messages for the sake of formality? How many of those people whom you follow or are friends with would really take their time to do something for you? Deep down, you know the answer to this.
Though it’s been more than a few months since I got rid of Whatsapp, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter – truth is, I haven’t been contacted by more than a couple of my friends. That’s the reality. At least, I know it now.
Now, I use my smartphone for productivity. I spend most of my time either reading on my smartphone/ on NoFap website replying to people. Also, I have installed the right productivity tools like Evernote, Drive, Splendo ( To-Do list app), Calendar and I use them in combined to plan my day, do the tasks that I have been procrastinating since ages and work on my life vision. Moreover, I have subscribed to a few YouTube channels that I like and I make sure that I keep my feed clean.
Managing Urges is simple.
Once you set up your reasons, make a firm commitment, improve your understanding and awareness, managing urges ain’t that tough.
Delve deep into reading rebooting content so that you become a professional rebooter. Just keep reading. I have given a few book links in the below section.
Set up proper reasons.
5 Methods to Fight Urges
1. Repetition Method – This method comes from the book, ” The Power Of SubConscious Mind” by Joseph Murphy. ( Get it here: U.S. link/ India link ) If you repeat anything often and attach feelings to it, it seeps into your subconscious mind and becomes a part of your character and reality.
So, in this method, you have to create some mental oaths and repeat them as often as possible. Here’s one oath I created which I repeat often.
Oath I repeat –
“Haey Ram! ( Ram is an Indian God ) Give me light and purity. Let me get established in physical and mental Brahmacharya. Let me be pure in thoughts, words and deeds. Give me the strength to control my senses and observe brahmacharya vrata ( fast ). Let all my senses be engaged in your service and the service of humanity.
Wipe out all the sexual desires and impressions. Annihilate lust from my mind. Let me be chaste in look. Let me always walk in the path of righteousness. Make me a true Brahmachari. Make me as pure as Swami Vivekananda, Hanuman or Lakshman. Forgive me for all my sins and offences. I am pure. I am strong. I am powerful.”
– Oath Taken from Brahmacharya By Swami Sivananda ( US / IN )
This is the oath which I repeat in the morning after I wake up and before going to sleep. It’s indeed powerful. Your oath need not be so long and specific. It can be as simple as this. Make sure it’s positive. Make sure you feel the words when you speak the words. And make sure you repeat it often so that subconscious mind accepts this.
“I am chaste. I am strong. I am powerful. I have understood this filthy world and all my brainwashing is removed. I conserve my semen and allow it to nourish my physical, mental and spiritual world.”
Do feel free to use your own words and create your oaths. Can you come up with some oaths that you can repeat often? Do share it.
2. 5 Second rule – This is based on a book 5 sec rule by Mel Robbins. ( Get it here: U.S./ India ) The rule can be used to beat urges as well as to get the things done that you consider important.
If you get an urge, just count backwards 5 4 3 2 1, and as you count 1, just get up from your place and just do something. It can be to just start walking at your place. Or to hit a few pushups. Or to hit a few situps. Or to just move up and wash your face.
When you interrupt the thought at the right time and move your body, you change the state of your mind and body and urge can’t trouble you for long.
I used to hit pushups during my first month and the rule helped me a lot. You can try this too. And the book is a great read that can help you to enhance your productivity and beat the habit of procrastination.
3. Mindfulness – This is a little-advanced method to beat urges. Instead of running away from urge like you do in 5 sec rule, here you actually face the urge face to face.
When the urge shows up and tried to defeat you, just do this.
- Sit down comfortably no matter where you are. Whether you are in the office, travelling by train or just sitting in your home doing nothing, you can do this anywhere. It starts with you taking deep breaths and sitting comfortably.
- Keep your back straight and comfortable. Keep your eyes open.
- And start focussing on your breath. Feel the urge. Face the urge.
- Enjoy the breathing process. Concentrate on your breath. Enjoy breathing that fresh air into your lungs. Expel out all your worries. You can do this for a few minutes to sitting hours at a place.
Don’t forget in the distractions of the world that it’s only your breath that keeps you alive. Learn to appreciate it. Sit like this for a few minutes. Allow the urge to go away and feel the victory. You can read Buddha in blue jeans by Tai Sherida. It’s the shortest and the most amazing book I read. You can get it here. [ U.S. / India link ]
4. Cold Wash – Cold water can be especially helpful to fight the urges. Not only that, it improves blood circulation, reduces anxiety, reduces depression and also provides great mood management capabilities.
Take the cold shower once a day. So many brothers have felt its benefits and except for a couple of days, I have made sure to never skip it. Do you also think that cold shower is beneficial? Do let me know.
5. Power of faith – If you believe Him, He surely helps. During the times when you feel yourself getting defeated, you can always ask Him for help. I have developed a great faith in Bhagwan Hanuman ( A Hindu God who was a lifelong celibate ) and I start humming his words when I feel a little out of control.
I am sure you can pick up some of these methods and make it a part of your character so that it becomes easy for you to manage the urges. Which one do you plan to use? And remember to make your mind beforehand and just stick to one method.
Embrace flatlines.
I just came out of 10 days long flatline that lasted from day 110. With mild headaches, no libido, mood swings, less concentration, it can be certainly a difficult time.
But don’t worry. Body is healing from inside. There is a battle between good and evil going on and so body exhibits certain symptoms. And the good always wins if you remain persistent. Have a positive attitude. You are a man and nothing can go wrong with your D. So just hold on and allow it to pass. Can’t you bear a little pain for all the sins you were getting involved in?
How have been your experiences in flatline?
Nofap ain’t a miracle. You still need to do a lot.
It’s the starting of your new life/new phase. You join the very few once you start doing this seriously. But planning is important. You need to have long-term, mid-term and short-term visions that push you each day.
Without planning and knowing where you want to go, there would be nothing to push you to get better. Sit down and ask yourself the questions that you know are important and you have been always avoiding due to all the desires you want to get involved in. Now is the time to sit down and ask: Where do I want to be in 10 years? How do I spend each day of my life? Who are all with me? What do I do at weekends?
Being successful is spending most of your time doing things that you truly value and make you happy.
Remember, planning is an investment. You always save time when you plan. Don’t consider it as some sort of burden. Be the artist of your life and create your life of fantasy. Spill the words. Draw the pictures. Feel it. It may seem impossible to get all the things that you want but it ain’t impossible. If its tough, it means that there is a lot of hard work to be done and with that sexual energy conserved, it won’t be tough to get the life of your desires.
I would advise you to Read How to Take Control of your life in a Distracted World by Andres Ravello. Pick it up here if you are from the U.S. and here if you are from India.
Don’t be so pissed off by being lonely.
I see so many people complaining about being lonely. Remember: you came here alone and you would go alone. You came from the darkness of womb and you would still be going into the dark world. Embrace being alone. It’s the time to learn to live alone. Time to learn to manage your emotions. Time to realize the fake nature of everything in your life. Time to develop skills. Time to spend with your family. Time to build the physique that you greatly admire. Time to control the senses that delude you. Time to wait for the right persons which would truly uplift your souls and make you see the new dimension of life.
Stop complaining that you don’t have a gf. She is still going to suck on your male energy and money and still leave you feeling hollow. She would be an obstructor in your rebooting attempts. She would consume all your mental energy, something that you could have used to solve the endless problems aligning with your skills and passion that humanity is facing with 7 billion+ of us now. She ain’t a magical pill that would solve your life issues.
Embrace loneliness. I stay alone most of the day and instead of seeing it as loneliness, I see this the time to introspect and improve and wait for the right person that would surely show up sooner or later. Don’t walk in a herd of sheep; be a lion.
Do a simple google search and find some clubs near your place. I am planning to join an adventure based club sooner and it’s going to be fun meeting new random people. Do you have some great other suggestions to beat loneliness? Be glad to share.
Be careful. Anything can be addictive.
From smartphones to fast foods, from Netflix to fashion – everything is designed to please our senses and give us dopamine hits so that we keep coming back to them. Keep the senses in check. Spend more time alone, thinking about yourself, thinking about real-self or spirit, getting immersed in meditation and staying generous and kind.
Read. Read. And read !!
Getting someone’s lifetime knowledge, reading someone’s life experience and all that in cheap – perhaps, nothing can do you more good than reading can. It helped me raise my understanding, made me aware about so many things and made me so much of a better man.
Here are a few of them I would advise you to read :
Note – I have provided the U.S. And India’s Amazon links for I order often from both these sites. Please Copy the book name and find the respective books for your country.
Few rebooting books that you must read.
1. Rebooting as the best remedy. Get it here.
2. Brahmacharya Book ( IN / US ). You can also read its online version for free here.
3. Also, Secret Of Eternal Youth by Divine Inspiration. ( IN / US )
4. Your Brain On Porn by Gary Wilson. ( IN / US ) This is a must-read for every rebooter here.
5. Wondering if Prostitution is right or not? Then read Paid For My Journey Through Prostitution. ( US )
6. A lot of you may have heard about this book by George Collins or may have read it. Yes, it’s breaking the cycle. An amazing book on Sex Addiction. ( US / IN )
7. Also, check out this site and read this often.
Other self- development books I would advise you are –
1. How to be truly Productive by Andres Ravello ( US / IN )
2. Wellness Sense by Om Swami ( Book on health and nutrition ) ( US / IN ). A must read if you want to learn about nutrition and live a natural carefree life without ever thinking about weight gain issues again.
3. 5 Second Rule by Mel Robbins ( US / IN )
4. Buddha in Blue Jans by Tai Sherida ( a short book that you can read multiple times. It teaches mindfulness) ( US / IN )
5. Power Of subconscious mind by Joseph Murphy ( US / IN )
It’s very recent that I have realized that I have so much passion for reading. I have finished most of the books that I mentioned above.
Do you have any good suggestions too? I would love listening from you.
LINK – 120+ Days Update – 20 Benefits & Few Advises with some MUST Read Books