My story:
-I’m very fit, from having run from tweenage up until varsity in college. Nowadays, I frequently win my age group in regional races.
-I’m very healthy: I’ve had blood tests while trying to debug the ED issues, and everything is nominal
-Successful in life: I was good at college, and got a good job. These days, I’m a cofounder of a startup.
-Bullied in elementary school, which led to zero confidence when women started hitting on me in HS (when I started being athletically successful), which led to zero sexual relationships until I was in my mid-20s, at which point I’d been PMOing for a decade
-First several sexual experiences were awful, marred by ED, despite being with a physically stunning woman.
-ED-marred sex experiences continued through several more relationships. Even with pharma assistance, pauses to get me back up were frequent.
-Since about age 20, more often than not, my very infrequent wet dreams would involve me finding a website with “the perfect set of videos”, rather than real women.
-My porn habits themselves weren’t as extreme as some other stories I’ve read: It’d be a very businesslike 15 minutes or so when I was bored, about 5-7 times per week. Definitely didn’t rule my life, and was very easy to drop once I came across YBOP’s theories about it causing ED. I feel very lucky to have this “easy” level of porn addiction, and I’m pulling for those guys that got in deeper before they found YBOP.
What brought me to YBOP:
-Had a very promising relationship that ended due to the frequent sex issues. Had difficulty keeping things up.
-A couple weeks before it ended, we had yet another ED-marred sex attempt. An hour or so later, I had a wonderful rock-hard masturbate in front of my PC, and (finally) realized the problem was not physical, but mental. If I could get it up in front of a PC screen, why couldn’t I get it up with a woman? This thought didn’t immediately bring me to YBOP, but a couple weeks later after the breakup I started googling “porn and ED” and found YBOP. The success stories and overall theory seemed sound and jived with my own experience.
My YBOP Symptoms:
-ED with women despite being young, straight, attracted, and healthy
-Thinking “I can’t wait to jerk off while thinking about this” when I saw someone hot like in a nightclub, rather than pursuing them right there. The default action was never to try to enter into a relationship with the attractive person, but rather to use them as masturbation fuel.
-Relationships where I tried to redirect happenings away from sex because sex was so stressful
-Sex being insanely stressful. Rather than enjoying it, it was always just a battle to perform adequately enough to stay in the relationship. Like a pilot says “you either come out of the doctor’s office fine (as you were) or grounded”, sex felt like I came out of the bedroom fine or dumped. It wasn’t something joyful, but rather something to be dreaded.
Past Wrong Theories for why I had this issue:
-Asexual (nope – I like sex)
-Malnutrition (doesn’t really make sense if I’m running and succeeding at half marathons. Plus I made dietary changes that didn’t help)
-Dehydrated (nope – still had issues while well hydrated)
-Fetish to the extent I needed it to get off (nope – though indulging would help, I both had fetishless successes and fetish-involved massive failures)
-Bad health (nope – blood tests showed I’m in fine health, plus I’m healthy enough to do all my athletic stuff)
-Stressed (nope – until I started this startup, my job was cushy and finances are healthy)
Stats Before my 90-days:
-Orgasm rate (without condom) about 2-5%
-ED rate probably 50-75% rate (25-50% with viagra). I’d get through sex, but we’d have frequent pauses for me to masturbate myself back to life. Pre-sex, I’d often have to self-masturbate a ton to get up.
-Blowjobs almost invariably led to me losing my erection. I’d always be trying to tend to myself to keep things up, and too stressed to enjoy the sensations.
-I’d also overheat frequently – I’d get too hot, and that’d invariably lead to ED. I’d previously noticed I’d always flex and strain my legs while masturbating, which creates a ton of heat. I suspect that phenomena has decreased as my threshold to get aroused and to orgasm has gone down.
During my 90 days:
-GF gave me a second chance
-I was open about YBOP’s theory about PIED, and she was accepting of it.
-I didn’t notice a huge flatline
-Masturbated about once a week in a doggystyle-style position without any stimulation beyond my hand. I know M+O isn’t recommended, but it was a great source of progress reporting. My journal went from “could barely keep it up, finished while soft” to “rock hard in about 30 seconds, finished quickly”. In summer 2016 I remember attempting the same thing and I couldn’t even get off WITH PORN PLAYING unless I was in my computer chair. This is honestly probably my biggest definitively measurable improvement.
-In the first month, I had two abortive sexual attempts thanks to ED, but because we agreed to focus on non-P-in-V sex, it wasn’t a problem and we just focused on getting her off. That alone is a huge boost to confidence.
-In the 2nd and third months, I only had one failed attempt, and it was primarily because I was exhausted on that particular day. I think I might’ve even been able to get it up that day, but abstained thanks to physical exhaustion.
-Morning wood came back in a hurry: Within a week or two I was having excellent morning wood every morning. I had noticed it had completely disappeared during summer 2017.
-Wet dreams are still infrequent (maybe once a month), but their content has generally involved sex with my GF, rather than finding websites with sexy videos.
Now:
-Orgasm rate without condom is probably close to 90%
-In the last 30 days (including today!), have had my first two condom-on orgasms, after probably ~50-75 sex sessions with a condom over 7 years. It’s awesome to get off with a condom. Much less mess
-In the last 30 days, have had several sex sessions without any pharmaceutical assistance. Doses of Viagra are on their way down.
-Got back together with the GF whose breakup precipitated my discovery of YBOP, and the relationship is doing awesome.
-During sex, I don’t have a great desire for my old sexual fetish. It’s definitely still there (been there since I can remember), but it’s not to the point that I need it to get hard. I’m torn about re-introducing it because I don’t want to become dependent on it again. On one hand it’d improve sex even more, on the other she’s not into it as much as I am, so dependence is a real possibility.
Anyway, I hope that this post finds and helps someone like me, just like other posts helped me. I’m not cured yet (still got those damn blue pills), but I’m 10x more confident than I ever have been, and I’m 100x as confident that I’ll be getting better going forwards.
LINK – Made it to 90 Days!
By iugejbMADT
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