After this 90 day journey i can see just how blind and deluded i was and just how destructive and damaging P and MO is. It numbs and detaches from reality and feeling, it is a mind numbing disconnection from life. I realise that the last 8 years that have been dedicated to P have robbed me of the beauty of life’s true bountiful experiences. I met many wonderful girls that i failed to notice were wonderful girls (i only saw the sexiness or hotness in girls)
I neglected my business although i thought i was focused on it, i was lazy and lethargic, hungry for success but not willing or able to put in the work to achieve that success.
Its a hard journey changing bad habits for good habits, for cutting out addictions (and P/PMO is crack), but its worth it. It is a beautifully light place without the weight of P around your neck pulling you down and away from life. I feel like i am involved in life again, that there are wonderful people waiting to be met, wonderful experiences waiting to be experienced and wonderful successes awaiting my arrival. And for the first time in a long time none of my thinking has anything to do with O (less so PM) – in fact, there is nothing less relevant and further from my mind.. and that is just the way that i like it!…
I am just about to complete my 90-day Hard PMO challenge. The funny thing is though.. i didn’t actually realise before taking on this abstinence challenge that Porn and PMO was quite so impactful and destructive. It was simply that this is the kind of thing that i do; sacrifice the short term pleasure in things for the greater long term good and benefit. I gave up alcohol, meat, dairy, sugar and caffeine, committed myself to healthy eating and cycling, swimming and regularly going to the gym. Mainly because i like the power that comes from embracing discomfort and winning through, in pushing and challenging myself and delivering on the goal. It feels great to know that there isn’t ‘anything’ that has any power over me – and that i have ultimate power in my life to choose my way.
Abstaining from PMO seemed the perfect next challenge for me even though i didn’t really feel that it was impacting negatively on my life. I met girls yes, many i would never bother to contact again or i would let fizzle out. With most i wouldn’t be bothered about having sex with either, although i had a big appetite for P and MO. When i did have sex i would always take a blue pill to ensure a stable erection as it was a problem without. But all this said, i was still happy and ok with my life as i felt it was a life choice not to be involved with anyone, and i was busy working on my business.
LINK – A battle that i didn’t even know i was fighting!..
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