One Man’s Struggles With Transexual Porn

“I’m a straight guy who has gotten really into tranny porn over the last month. I’m shocked at my own attraction to it. Like the others here, I’m not attracted to men or penis’ on men, and I’m only attracted to feminine looking trannies. I have also contacted some tranny escorts in my area, asked questions, etc. I even went as far as trolling outside a tranny party that I saw advertised on CL held at a bar in downtown NYC. I just wanted to observe the comings and goings, but it was a quiet night. I have found this blog helpful and am grateful to those who have taken the time to post. I’m white, single, 37 years old, educated, fit, masculine.

Since I’m single, I won’t address the infidelity issue that has been raised on this blog. That’s a whole separate issue be it with man, woman or trans-gender.

For about the last 10 years I’ve been addicted to internet porn, masturbation, and sex with prostitutes (female). I have not the slightest doubt that this recent compulsion towards tranny porn is the porn addiction run a muck, and that the addiction caused this desire which is not natural to me, not innate in any way. I absolutely love women and have traveled the world and spent lots of money to have sex with women of all shapes, sizes, skin tones, etc. I would be open to being gay, I’m just not. This is about my mind needing to shock itself, cross boundaries, etc in order to produce the same thrill that other things once did.

Having read the posts I see a lot of people saying things like its no big deal and you should be who you are and like what you like, etc. Abstractly I would agree with all these principles but I think this is different. In almost all of these cases a porn addiction was present which is of course an unhealthy and unnatural state. Without this addiction the desires and impulses to fantasize about a tranny would never have existed. Therefore I don’t believe that any desires or compulsions that are born out of an addiction should be embraced. We are not talking about a situation where a guy meets a tranny in a bar, knowing or not, and ends up falling for a particular person. In addition, though transsexuals have existed for all times, only very recent modern medical technology consisting of hormones, various types of implants, facial augmentation,etc is able to produce such feminine looking transsexuals which all the men on here report as being the only ones they are attracted to, like myself. Therefore we are finding ourselves attracted to something that is not innate in the natural universe. It would be different if one found themselves attracted to trannies who did nothing more that grow their hair, wear women’s clothes and makeup, etc. Just as McDonalds has created foods that people find unnaturally tasty and literally kill themselves over, the porn and sex industry have created modern day transsexuals for our consumption.

I’m very nervous having read how this has affected so many people lives. Right now my plan is simple: try to stop looking at it and hope my brain resets itself. This is of course easier said then done for a porn addict. If that fails I may go the route of living out the fantasy. Some men on here did report that after they tried it they realized the fantasy was better then the reality and it either went away or lessened greatly. That has happened to me with other sexual fantasies. Of course there is always the chance it goes the other way…

I have also found it helpful to look at pics and videos that show transsexuals before and after. This makes my erection go away in a hurry and if exposure to visual images got me into this mess, maybe I can use different images to get me out of it.

Good luck to all those affected by this.”