I like this method from Paula Hall’s book Understanding and Treating Sex Addiction, Routledge 2012 p.140.
“Essentially this allows someone to create a dialogue with the problem that is located outside of the self rather than being an integral part of it. In other words, when a trigger is experienced, rather than beating the self up with negative self-talk or splitting the self up into good cop/bad cop the dialogue is aimed at the external problem – the addiction. So rather than saying ‘I want to act out’, externalisation would say ‘the addiction wants me to act out’. By projecting the problem outside of the self a new relationship can be created with the problem, which can empower change while protecting the self.”
My self voice has always been very harsh. Here’s a good link about this technique: http://obliquely.org.uk/blog/externalising/
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